Twilight

She pushed her feet deeper into the moist sand; slowly, little waves wet the sand even more. She gazed up at the sky, watching the setting sun. Her brother snapped a photo of her placid posture, pretty smile, and the picturesque view. She tried to remember: how many times has she seen the sunset? She smiled as her parents took shape in her imagination.

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A pregnant woman was sitting on a lounge chair; strong, manly arms were circling her lovingly. She leaned her head on her husband’s naked chest and looked up, sniffing the sea’s aroma. His hands played with her long hair, and he glanced up to watch the sunset with her. She murmured while still looking at the sky, “next year, we’ll have our baby with us!”

********

Same woman, same beach, but this time, a three-month old baby was sleeping on her lap; her husband was stroking the baby’s cheek gently with his damp hand. The baby stirred and started to whimper. The woman held and hugged her, patting her back gently to calm her down. Her husband hugged her from behind and raised her chin with a finger;  Both looked at the setting sun. An annoyed sob from their baby made the woman’s attention shift towards her. She held her up because she wanted her to watch this with them. The baby smiled soundlessly at the sky, but her moodiness caused by the disturbance she experienced while napping quickly brought her back to crying. Her mother rocked her tenderly until she slept peacefully again.

********

The baby was now a year old. Her father was coming out of the water, carrying her on his back as her arms circled his neck. His wife had been gesturing for him to come out of the water for quite a while; she didn’t want to miss their customary ritual: watching the sunset together. But his girl had looked sad and teary when he wanted to take her out of the water, so he decided to convince her by treating her to a nice ride on his back until they reach shore. He set her on the sand beside their umbrella, panting but laughing. Again, he embraced his wife from behind and they both admired the sunset; he whispered something to her that made her call her daughter, who was digging a hole in the sand.

“Look up, Twilight.”

Twilight looked towards the sky, and her mother sighed and wept silently.

“it’s a pleasure she’ll never fully enjoy.”

 They had just known that their girl was legally blind. She could see some colors, and because of her light and shadow perception, she could see shadows and light. Maybe she could see the yellowish color of the sun?

********

Twilight was three years old. She was still in love with the water and the sea’s atmosphere. The only thing that had changed was her reaction to the sunset, As her mother had expected, based on the newest x-rays and reports from her doctor that confirmed that the  little vision she had had lessened. Only the light and shadow perception stayed. This was a hard blow for her parents, for they had to change the rehabilitation method she was receiving: she wouldn’t be reading and writing normally, they had to resort to braille. However, her mother’s lofty hopes for her daughter and her persistence fortified her efforts and made her work, along with the vision rehabilitation specialists, as much as she had before and even more. Still, a pang of pain lingered in her heart because she was certain her daughter won’t see any hint of color in the sunset. The distance will also complicate her observation of the setting sun. Soon, her visual memory would gradually fade, and she wouldn’t recall that spectacular scene. Two years ago, she had thought that this scenery would never be fully appreciated and enjoyed by her daughter, but now, she knew that Twilight will never enjoy it at all.

********

Twilight returned from her absent mindedness with a start when her brother sprayed her face with the water pistol. She squealed in fright because she was so lost in thought. Her brother laughed at her reaction and left her in peace. She sighed and reflected on the situations she imagined had occurred at different, scattered points of her life; she knew they were the products of her yearning to see the sunset, which she doesn’t remember seeing before, and her awareness and knowingness of the developments of her vision impairment, which her mother had discussed with her a lot. She lifted her gaze up towards the sky and squinted and stared; she could only identify the degree to which the sky had darkened with the sunset. She realized the difference in the strength and radiance of the sunlight, and she could easily spot the variation, even though it wasn’t huge compared to the last time she had looked at the sky. Other details she was thirstily, vehemently zealous to see were not visible to her. She kept looking at the sky; she wished that she would be granted a second, just a second of sight to see the only thing she ever dreamed to see. Despite of her accomplishments, excellence, and the normal life she fought for, where she isn’t inferior to any sighted person with her independence, perseverance, and love for learning, she experiences situations when she wishes for moments of sightedness. Even her dear recollection of seeing the color yellow didn’t provide her with a clear idea of how the color yellow looked, and so didn’t suffice her desire to know the visual part of the sunset. Everyone who knew about her wish tried to describe it to her. She tried to piece together the fragmented descriptions she heard from each person until she made this very good  description in her mind. there is an imaginary line they see that makes the see and the sky meet; when the sun sets, the circle, which is the shape of the sun, loses a part, making the shape irregular. Each disappearing part looks like it’s submerging. This turns the sky into a multitude of colors in a variety of shades: yellow, orange, pink, red, purple, gray, and indigo when the sun has set. No matter how descriptive it is, Twilight believes that it isn’t even close to the real view; to add on, it lacks a vital part: the spectacular scene and its remarkable beauty. Also, colors are meaningless to her; she knows nothing more than their names. At this point, there is no communication between their world and hers, and she feels jealous of them and angry towards her mind that doesn’t assist her with any helpful memories.

********

Twilight was holding her brother’s hand; she was squeezing it as if it was her safety that she had to cling to. She was in a hospital bed, and after some procedures she didn’t care to understand, her eyes were let out of the bandages that were rapping them for a week, after the completion of her surgery. She squinted a couple of times and opened and closed her eyes until she adapted to the light. Her brother was ready! His phone was right in front of her eyes the second she could open them properly. It displayed her picture, 8 years ago when she was 16, at the beach during sunset. Her eyes lit up. Her smile widened and showed her dimples conspicuously. Tears of happiness fell from her eyes for the first time in her life, as she has never cried gleefully. She hugged her brother until he screamed in pain! 

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“maybe I saw it before, maybe I will see it later, but until then, it will be my desire, I will never stop wanting to see the sunset,” 16-year-old Twilight thought.