Chosen?! 1,2,3, Not It!

Rushing in while closing the door quickly behind me. Closing my eyes, standing in pitch black, with my hand on my chest. Trying to gain control of my breathing so I don’t have to use the inhaler, now is not the time for coughing. I can hear his truck tires slide on the gravel. My mom rushing, heels pounding the floor, hearing the urgency to catch him outside with every step. Both doors slamming at the same time makes me jump. My insides feel like every emotion you can think of all knotted up in a razor blade twister on the inside, when ever he comes around. I slide down the wall into my indoor fort. 

Its quiet now. Feeling confident I can use my flashlight. I pick up my journal.

Dear Diary,

 Here is where most would feel afraid, sitting in a pitch black closet for what could be hours. I have a flash light, a book, this journal, snacks, couple of sandwiches, and water. Here I feel safe. Out there, not so much. 

Hearing the rocking chair rock out in my room brings me back from writing. Reminding me I am never alone. Sitting my journal and light to the side, I close my eyes. 

I cant hear you but, I feel you.

I cant see you but, I smell you.

I don’t know you but, I think I do.

The rocking chair stops as the back door opens and shuts. 

Reading the foot steps I know its my mother. As her steps get closer I know she's headed this way. Hey its Mama, she says coming into my door way. She opens the closet door and tells me if I need to pee, GO NOW. 

I push up from sitting crossed legged, getting my foot tangled in the blanket as the top part of me continues out the closet. Taking off in a sprint up the hall cutting to the left, door closed and on the toilet seat right in time. No idea how long I have all I’m focused on is the task at hand. 

Opening the door slowly, listening for movements, I see my mother standing in the middle of the living room looking toward the back-door through the kitchen. She's surrounded in smoke and showered by a stream of light coming into the living room window. She's waving me on to my room never taking her eyes off the back-door.

 Running up the hall I step a little to close to the left and my foot lands right on the furnace grate and grabs my toe stopping me dead in my tracks. Biting my lip to keep from screaming as I hear the back-door open followed by his voice. Softly I walk and close myself back into the closet. 

Slowly sitting back cross legged I flick on the flashlight as I re-situate my fort. The sound of the TV coming up the hall, Smell of cigarette smoke filling the house. I eagerly get back to writing. 

I’m not even suppose to be here. I’m suppose to be at school, but I got suspended yesterday for fighting and now I’m confined to this closet. I cant go to prom now either. I mean it could be worse. I could be suspended the rest of the year instead of three days. There's a new boy in my class. He moved from Pennsylvania. He doesn't look like any of the boys here. The only thing I've ever heard about that place is that its where the vampires live. Is he a vampire? I mean he could be. Dark Hair, Dark eyes, Pale skin and wears dark clothes. That is all for now. Love Alice. 

Closing the journal, sitting it to the side. I drop my flashlight reaching for my cup. Taking a big gulp of my water and placing it back in the corner. Staring down that cup of water as I lean back into the opposite corner.

 Needing to learn to accept what I can do and the ability to control it. The cup starts to vibrate making the water tremble inside. As it knocks the base board I had my hand ready to stop the fall. 

I may never be able to share my powers with anyone. I realized this a couple years ago when I shared my dream of the space shuttle blowing up in my back yard only to wake up and tell my mom about it for her to tell me it was just a dream. I believed her until I was sitting in class and my teacher interrupted class by rolling in the TV cutting on the news to a space shuttle blowing up in the sky. The same one I had dreamed about the night before. Raising my hand I say I dreamed about this last night and my teacher is looking at me mouth dropped open. She says, don’t be silly Alice you only think you dreamed it. Dismissed, I think, surely my mom will believe me now.

Later that day upon returning home from school. I say hey mom, soon as I walk in the door, about that space shuttle. Standing in the doorway between the kitchen and living room, She cuts me off with, I don’t know how you did that, how you could have known that but I need you to not talk about it with no one. You’re teacher called me, along with your principle. You will end up in a mental hospital if you go around telling people about your dreams that come true. Those things are only in the bible, not here.  

Closing my bedroom door behind me as I escape inside. I need a breather. The meeting about my person starts in 15 minutes and I am not prepared. The sisters have faith in me I have yet to find. Its crazy to me that my time with her has almost come to its end. Yet the contract she is in, no where near done.

Flipping the bathroom light on I quickly Walk straight for the sink.

Turning the knob water rushing from the faucet, Splashing the cold water onto my face, I hear a knock on the door, Its time. 

Today is the day I will be passing guidance of you onto not only my sister but my dear friend. I trust that she will guide you and communicate with you in ways that excel what I could do. As I take my seat in the back ground I will be seeing you at the end of the string.

I whisper into her sleeping ear.

Startled awake by Mom opening the closet door. It took me a minute to realize who she was and where I was. The dream was so real, It felt like I was really there. Some kind of ceremony for me. Weird.

He's gone? I say, standing up quickly because I have to pee again. Yes, he's gone, she barely gets out before I have zoomed by her trying to get to the potty, ringing the seat with my half naked booty. Slid those the rest of the way down and… relief

 He’s gone to work for the night so coast is clear. 

Yahhh, I say as I come bouncing from the bathroom. 

Don’t get to excited you still have to stay in the house and do not answer the door or phone. I have to go out for a few hours. Do you still have your sandwiches? She ask as she gathers her purse and cigarette case from the counter. I nod, yes ma’am and she's out the door. 

I sprint off to my room to gather my food from earlier today. Refill my glass with milk and head straight to the tube box. I can watch whatever I want so yeah I like it when Its just me. I guess. 

It only takes two clicks and I’m on the horror channel. Nightmare on Elm street is on. I could watch this over and over again, I say out-loud as I back up to the foam red couch behind me, Plopping down. My bedroom door slams shut. Putting my food and blanket off to the side as if that will help me hear better or be more ready to run which ever needed.

Didn’t I tell you not to do that, roars sister one, bursting through the door.

I mean it could get her attention and she just might be able to receive the message, sister two says, as she slide off her bed.

Or you could scare her to death. 

Look even though she has a contract with us sisters of fate doesn’t mean she cant make her own choices. And the choice she's making right now is watching a scary movie about a burned man that haunts nightmares. Nobody said it was a great one, but here we are.

I see what you’re saying. I do. Better choices on when to deliver the sign.

Right, thank you. 

Besides have patience she will be here when she goes to sleep.

The plans set for her journey. She will need all hands on deck. Our goddess is most interested in her plans. 

Be Where? I say, as I’m getting up from the couch.

The two beautiful ladies I was just watching argue about what seemed like was about me are both looking at me with no color left in their faces.

Where did you come from?

The lady in peach clears her throat as the lady in green covers her mouth.

I’m sorry for interrupting, as I sit back down. They both looking at each other and back at me.

 I just assumed you’re in my living room pointing at me on the couch here and I really just want to know what's going on. 

What Contract?

Who’s Journey, Mine?

Who are the two of you?

Why are you here?

You know, I say, as I take a bite of my bologna sandwich with warm mayo and mustard oozing onto my lap. I think I remember seeing both of you in my dreams.

Please don’t talk with your mouth full. The lady in green says, I cant understand what you’re saying when you do that. And snap out of it your gonna chock eating in this state. This isn’t your conversation. At least not yet. Now snap, she says, snapping her fingers at me.

Sandwich half way to my mouth. A sandwich I don’t remember opening, or eating 3 bites off of, for that matter.

Was I just asleep? 

What the heck was that?

Is someone here?

Looking up at the TV Nancy is being drug across the ceiling while she screams as blood spews the room. Feels like my life, I say with a sarcastic chuckle.

I sit my food down on the coffee table and get up holding my shirt, careful to not spill the crumbs and globs until I’m perfectly centered over the trash can. 

Its, “Do you know where your kids are”? time as the announcement interrupts Elm street. I throw away what was left of my food for the day. Walk over to hit the knob on the TV and grab my blanket from the couch. Just in time too. Crunching gravel tells me Someone is coming up the drive way. The only light in the house now is the lamp sitting on the end table placed beside his chair. I’m in my room and in my bed pretending to be asleep before the vehicle even stops. 

How Did this Happen, The Goddess questions out-loud. 

She is the one. 

The One who signed this contract before she left here, headed back for earths school. 

And now you three are sitting here with those faces on telling me she's not the one for this mission. 

Excuse me, Hey, Hi, 

So Ive been listening, I know, I know, not my conversation. I understand. Yet it is about me and that to me sounds like research that I’m simply doing.

Any-who, Goddess Ma’am, may I speak to you directly.

Sure Alice, Step closer to me.

Walking forward about 10 paces as I feel all eyes on me. Keeping my eyes on the goddess before me as she never took hers off of mine. 

Ma’am Am I understanding correctly that I have signed up for this thing called earth school. 

Yes, that is correct. 

OK, and all the bad things that's happened to me. I signed up for that too?

Yes, those things in general were chosen as lessons, by you, with the knowledge that others involved as well as your self still have free will.

I see, says Alice. 

Listen, Now that I’m here and able to access the situation fully.

Let me start off with saying, I’m honored, truly I am.

It’s just that, I’m not your Hero. I’m not who you thought I was. 

When you picked my file out of everybody else’s file and said this one is it this is the Hero for us all you really should have looked at that free will box I checked off on before stamping Hero on me.

Alice, Alice Calm down, I understand you’re frustrated with your first 12 years there but I need you to understand the big picture. 

Oh I get it, I see the Big picture just fine ma’am, sacrifice myself for everyone else. Yet I suffer. You thought I was a female version of Christ returning. 

Find you somebody else to be the Hero.

No Ma’am, Not I! 

3 months later…

Ladies thank you for coming here today.

We are here to discuss Alice.

It seems she has turned her attention to worldly things and is now carrying a tiny at the age of 13. I see here her mother is making the choice for her to terminate. This wasn’t a part of the plan. This is not what her and I sat down and put in the contract. I’m desperately trying to get her to follow the path, yet, the souls she has individual contracts with are becoming a huge problem.

Sister 2, who recently joined in with the second part of Alice’s journey chimes in with, Goddess Ma’am, it seems to me we have already exhausted all of our resources to get her to wake up now, yet nothing is working. I fear us sisters, as they nod amongst themselves, believe there was a mistake as well on the hero path. 

Goddess with a stone face stands. 

I don’t think you understand what a Hero truly is, she says, looking out over the tables filling the room.

Looking down at the sisters of fate as they lower their heads. 

Sisters, she says, with a rumble in her voice that shakes all the tables and chairs violently. 

I know to you it seems defeat is upon us. I suspect you will want me to roll the dice and pick over again. I regret to inform you all that this will not be the case.

I have done more than ever and will continue to give extra light to her path until there is no more string to string. 

As will you three along with the rest of the spirit team appointed to her. 

It seems she isn’t the only one with lessons to be learned, Do we understand? She bellows.

Yes ma’am, our Goddess, the sisters say, jumping from their seats with a bow.

Very well then, whispers the Goddess.

Carry on, as she shoos the sisters away. 

And now we wait, she says, with a sigh, sitting back upon her throne.