Not a disney date.

She stood awkwardly, book in hand as she leaned against a pillar looking out for her date. It was quiet on the street and she felt anxious, the sky was darkening and she remembered all the times that she'd been told the dangers of being alone outside in the darkness. She tried to distract herself with the book don't think about kidnappers and rapists and murderers... behind her people sat eating burgers in the dated McDonald's. She stole a glance at her outfit, she'd decided to wear a red polka dots dress, red shoes, a tote bag, and a black blazer; but looking about everyone else was wearing jeans and t-shirts. What if people think I'm a prositute... I am on a corner and everything... what if someone asks me for services? Ali’s fingers gripped hold of the side of her book tightly like it was a float in a swimming pool, her nails slightly denting the cover as she did so.

Further down the street Danielle was running, her red Dr Martens slapping the floor with every strike. I'm going to be late, is this what a heart attack feels like? She wondered as she ran. It had been a long time since her last date and she had been watching the minutes earlier in the day. Just as she was finishing work in strolled a demanding customer to please. It's always on the days that I want to leave on time this happens she'd thought as leaving time came and went. As soon as the matter was settled, she finished her work, grabbed her things and ran, stumbling as she went to the door. “Careful there you nearly knocked you’re noggin on that wall! Concussions aren’t cool!” Her manager laughed from their desk as she narrowly avoided an injury on her way out. Now Danielle was panting as she climbed the hill, the road was steeper than it appeared when walking, was it always that way? Still she had a cute girl waiting for her and that was worth a little exertion.

Ali realised that she’d read the same line over and over again when a voice dragged her back to the real world “how are you?” Flicking her eyes upwards she noted the appearance of the tall dark haired man with a sharks smile and brown eyes, “shall we go in then?” He asked gesturing with a nod of the head to the door of the McDonald’s. Really, this place on a first date? Ali nodded, shut her book and followed him inside trying to hide her disappointment, “well I thought we could have a bite here then go for a drink somewhere different after…” he explained as he led the way to the counter “what are you having? My shout… obviously.”

Ali blinked, the lights were really bright and she wasn’t really hungry “just some fries please”.

“Cheap date” he chuckled to himself “nice” before getting to the front of the queue and ordering himself a burger meal and Ali a small portion of fries with a wink. Ali started to wonder if this was what all dates were like…

Just before she reached the pub Danielle slowed herself down to a stroll and looked for a tissue to wipe the sweat off her brow. Don’t want to look to eager or like I’ve just been running a marathon. Then after stealing a glance at herself in a shop window reflection and running a hand through her hair perfect she strolled in looking for the cute girl with long brown hair and sea blue eyes that Carla had set her up with. A quick scan of the bar revealed a group of friends swapping stories over beer hovering on the right handside, a handful of office workers queuing for post work drinks in the middle and a greying couple falling over each other in an awkward personal display of affection on the other side. Checking out the tables there seemed to be a mixture of groups hanging out and solitary men drinking with their mobile phones. She walked slowly to the bar shooting glances around the room for the elusive Elise that she was supposed to be meeting. Joining the queue behind the office squad she started to doubt if this was a good idea. Maybe there was no cute girl, maybe Carla was just playing a prank on me… Whilst I’m here I might as well have one drink then go… At the bar there was a man with a punk hairstyle, black shirt and grey trousers serving, behind him there was another wearing black jeans, a black shirt and a brown pony tail stacking bottles on the spirits shelf. As Danielle reached the bar and ordered a pint the man elbowed his colleague, whispered in their ear, before they turned around. Danielle couldn’t help staring at her brilliant blue eyes “hi I’m Elise, you must be Danielle..” A stupid grin spread across her face as she stuttered “be must… I must be!” Elise smiled at her, grabbed a couple of pints and came out from behind the bar with a wink to the man still serving.

Ali fiddled with her book as she tried to get it into her tote bag while they waited, for a second she thought that she’d dropped it on to the floor but when it made it’s muffled thud with her note book and purse she felt relieved. Shark smile turned back to her “you’re a really lucky girl to have a date with a catch like me” he grinned at her waiting for a laugh “only joking!” He hurriedly cried before telling her about the music he was listening to on the way to meeting her, Ali nodded as he carried on talking. Was he really joking or does he actually think that she wondered as he filled the void with his words. After a few minutes their number appeared on the order screen and he grabbed their food, carried their order to a table and gestured to Ali to follow. This is what people do on dates right? They listen to people and go where they suggest… it’s not super exciting yet, does that come later? She walked over to the small table in the corner that he’d chosen and sat opposite him with her small carton of fries as he regaled her with his life story with a mouth full or hamburger, occasionally spraying the area with little bits of meat and bread.

“Er… are you working or on a date with me?” Danielle asked as they walked to a table near the jukebox. Elise flashed a smile at her “no I’m not working anymore I was just helping Alex while I waited, Carla said you’d be late.”

“I’m nev… not always late” Danielle admitted into her pint of Peroni. Elise laughed but reached out a hand to grab Danielle’s, “I don’t mind waiting for a hot girl y’ know”.

Danielle suddenly felt a little hotter and took off her leather jacket to try to distract from the fact she was blushing. She thinks I’m hot too! They sat there for a moment looking at each other before the questioning began “which do you think is better Star Trek Voyager or The Next Generation?”

Shark smile took the empty tray away and Ali wondered if he actually wanted to go somewhere else, somewhere less well lit or if she could think of an excuse to slope off home. Maybe fictional characters make for better romance… she wondered as she wiped food and spit particles off her clothes. He got very animated talking about his hopes for the future but Ali wasn’t sure if he’d asked her what her plans were or very much indeed come to think of it. As she went to throw her napkin in the bin he threw an arm around her shoulders and guided her out of the door, “right! On to the pub now!” Ali tried to wiggle out from under his arm but he grabbed on to her opposite shoulder then smirked, saying “come on the night’s still young lets have a drink.”

She sighed a tiny sigh and let him lead her down to the Red Dragon where he shouted a greeting to the serving man behind the bar as he went in. This isn’t normal is it? Surely this isn’t romance or what all first dates should be like? Maybe I can go after one drink, then I can at least say I’ve tried dating… Ali went with him to the bar and was released from under his arm as he ordered so she edged slightly to the side as he chattered to the man with the punk hairstyle whilst ordering a selection of drinks and crisps. Looking around this seemed more like a normal place for a date than a fast food restaurant, it still wasn’t super romantic with the rock band posters all over the ceiling and sticky floor but she felt a little more confident there. 

“Can you find us a table and I’ll bring them over?” Shark smile asked her, grinning what he considered to be his most winning smile. Ali nodded and found a table by the pool table, maybe we can have a game later. She took off her black blazer and slid it on to the back of her chair, admiring the nice leather jacket of the girl at the next table, she found herself looking at the shiny red boots and the legs in the blue leather jeans too before getting distracted by the distinct thud of glasses on a table top. When she turned around she noticed that there wasn’t just one drink for here there but three, then she realised he hadn’t said lets have a drink… no he’d said lets get drunk.

That first pint of Peroni had been very welcome after the run and the nerves, Elise was also very easy on the eye in her fitted black shirt and her curve hugging jeans. Danielle was glad that she let Carla talk her into getting back out there and going for a date even; if Elise didn’t like Star Trek, everyone had their little flaws right? They were both in their twenties and found each other attractive they were single maybe it was time to think about having some fun she thought as she went to the bar to get another drink for both of them. As she stood in the room she glanced around the room at the other people, the middle aged couple had gone to find a room of their own and the office crowd was starting to dissipate but next to her table was another couple a talkative man and a woman in red who was starting to look a bit tipsy. Danielle frowned, he doesn’t look very drunk but the woman with him… it’s not your problem, not your circus not your monkeys. She turned away and focused on her drink order.

“I… I think tha… thaa I need to go to the toilet…” Ali mumbled at shark smile. “Oh are you sure you don’t want to get out of here?” He asked. Ali shook her head and stood up slightly swaying, looked around a little longer than was necessary smiled at the women in the next table then stumbled towards the toilets.

Another woman walked behind her and they both entered at the little slightly too bright pink ceramic toilet room at the same time and went in their separate cubicles. When they washed their hands Ali started splashing water on her face, braced herself on the sink bowl and noticed the other woman’s shoes. “I like your red boots!” She told her a little too loudly. Danielle smiled at her “yeah, I like your red dress too…” Ali started to cry. “What’s wrong polkadots?” Ali leaned on the sink and rubbed the tears from her face, smearing her mascara down her cheeks. “I dunno… I just thought… I… thought a date might be a bit more fun?! That’s I’d get to chat more… but he’s just going on and on… giving me all these drinks and… I don’t even know why!” She started to sob again “I just thought I should’ve been on a date by now… but it’s rubbish he’s just… rude!”

“You know he just wants to sleep with you right?” Danielle blurted out as she dried her hands. Ali slapped her hand against her forehead, “now it makes sense! I’m another notch on his belt.”

“You don’t have to be you know” Danielle told her offering Ali a tissue to wipe her face, as their hands touched Ali’s brow unfurrowed and she lunged forward to kiss Danielle. For a second they enjoyed the sensation but Danielle gently pushed Ali away, “you’re too drunk for that and I’m on a date myself… but we’ll help you get away from that creep” she smiled. “Just wait here.”

As she left the toilets to talk to Elise she couldn’t spot her at her table, then as she got nearer she noted that the man Ali was with before wasn’t at his table either, instead they were furiously kissing against the jukebox. Seriously?!? She went over and cleared her throat, “Elise” they broke off and looked at Danielle. “Threesome?” The man asked, Elise grinned at her then giggled as she walked away.

Danielle returned to the toilets for Ali, “come on polkadots, lets get you home.” Ali nodded and let Danielle loop an arm though hers to guide her through the pub, stopping only to grab their jackets. They got a taxi and Danielle dropped Ali at her house, “here’s my number, message me when you get up or if you need any help ok?” Ali thanked her and then zig zagged to her door. Danielle smiled a tiny smile as the taxi drove off. Dating is still awful.

Why does my head… oh! Ali blinked awake and found the strip of paper with Redboots and a telephone number written on it. She smiled, rubbed her face with her hands and started to write a message. Maybe dating wasn’t the problem maybe it was the guy.