PINOCCHIO

TW: self harm, mental illness

             “Is it true that you like me, Ava?” asked Noah with an annoyed face. I stuttered when I heard his question. Should I be honest or not?. “Of course not”, said me in low voice. Suddenly I start to hiccup. Noah laughs and starts assaulting me with his nasty words. “What qualification do you think you have to like someone like me, ha?” said him arrogantly. I start to cry and run away. I felt very embarrassed and could not stop blaming myself for having this symptom. Everyone knew that every time I start to hiccup, its means I’m lying which I could not control myself. Yeap, it’s me. Ava, a girl that could not lie.

             I have this symptom since birth. The doctor called it Pinocchio Symptom. When I  lie, I will hiccup. If it's a big lie, I  will continue to hiccup until the truth is revealed. If it's a small lie, the hiccups will subside in a few minutes. It is something that I could not control. I was raised by a strong and lovely single mother. She raised me with love and patient. She loves me for who I am. I also have a best friend. His name is Liam. Liam was a smart and warm person. He always supports and protects me since we were a child. I felt very grateful to have wonderful people in my life. Since Liam and I were in high school, we decide to go to school together every day.

             One day, we have a new student transfer to our school. His name was Lucas. He has the deep and gorgeous hazel eyes that I have ever seen. His seat was behind me. I felt excited and nervous at the same time as he walks towards his seat. He looks so ravishing. But Lucas was a very cold and quiet person. I never saw him smile at all. It gives me a chill to talk to him. The girls in our class were head over heels at him including me. Well, who could blame us when someone as handsome as him in front of us. But he never spoke to any of us.

             One night when I was on my way to a convenience store near my house, I saw an injured man. Surprisingly, he was Lucas. He was badly injured with a bloody head and a wounded hand. I started to panic. I called his named several times to make sure he was conscious. I told him that I will call an ambulance for him. As I was about to take out my phone, he grabs my hand and says no. “Just take me to my home”, he said to me in a very low voice. I was still shocked. But, when I heard him groaned in pain, I quickly hold his arm and support him with my body. His house was quite far from mine. I ring the bell in front of Lucas’s house and his maids run toward us. They brought Lucas into the house while leaving me. I was blanked for a while. One of the maids asked me about what happens to Lucas. But, I also have no idea. They thanked me and asked me to go home as it was getting late at night.  My mind keeps wondering about what happened to Lucas.

             The next morning, I saw Lucas. He stared at me for quite a long time. As I seat down, he called me. “Thank you”, he said to me. I was smiling and blushing. I just nod my head and giggle quietly. As the school end, Lucas asked to talk to me later behind the school. I agreed to him. I told Liam and he said that he will wait for me. When I met Lucas, he started to ask me. “ Why do you help me?” he asked. I said that anyone would do the same thing as me if something like that happens while smiling at him. He was stunned by my answer. He takes a deep breath and asked me one last question. “ Do you like me, Ava?” he asked. I was flabbergasted. But I was too shy to say it. So I shake my head. Suddenly I started to hiccup. He looks shocked but started to smile and look at me. “ Why do I think that you are lying to me, ha?” he said. Then he said that maybe he will give me a chance to go on a date with him to show his gratitude. I rejected it at first but he insists on me. So, in the end, I agree.

             I told Liam about it. He was very surprised. He does not like my decision. But, I told him that it will be alright. He seems mad at me. But, I pursued him with my cute voice, and later he was okay. That night, Lucas texted me. He said that he will pick me up at 8.30 pm. I was so nervous. I started to get ready. I choose a pink short dress with a pair of white sneakers. When Lucas picked me up, he looked so charming with his black leather jacket. That night, we went to a restaurant called ‘Yummiezz’. They served the best milk ice shave I’ve ever eaten. We also ordered other dishes like Aglio olio, seafood risotto, and garlic bread. While eating, we begin to know about each other. Lucas seems like a cold person at first but as I getting to know him, he was a warm person. He likes to crack some jokes and have a very dashing smile. After we were done eating, we went to a cinema to watch the new release movie, called ‘Silent’. We choose this movie because we both like horror movies. During the movie was playing, I could not focus at all. I kept looking at Lucas to see his reaction, but he was so calm. Then suddenly, the person next to me accidentally pour a drink at my cloth. Lucas and I were very surprised. The person next to me just leaves without apologies. Lucas seems to be mad while holding his fist. I was quite angry at first but tried to calm down. I told Lucas that it’s fine. But, I still could see him mad, so I hold his arm and calm him down. Soon, he started to relax and look at me. “I think we have to end our date for tonight. You should go home now. Let’s go” he said to me. I nodded my head and smile at him. As I reach my house, Lucas wishes me good night and leaves. Tonight was a nice date even though that accident happened. I smile as a started to get sleepy.

             The next morning when Liam and I were on our way to school. Liam asked me about my date with Lucas. I said that it was nice and wonderful for me. I truly love it. Liam looked kind of sad. But I just ignored it assuming that he just jealous because I did not invite him along. Since the morning, Liam ignored me. He seems to be sulking. I was so confused by his behavior. He usually did not act like that. Liam that I knew was a mature guy but somehow today he seems to differ. After school, Liam asked me to go home first. I was very confused about his behavior. On my way back home, I saw him at the convenience store near my house eating ice cream. I approached him. “Why are you here? I thought you were still at school” I said to Liam. Liam stared at me for quite a while. Then he said,“ Why are you so stupid?”. I was shocked by his words and asked him back “What are you talking about. I don’t understand”. He took my hand and said, “I like you, Ava. Since we are a child. Why you don’t even notice it. It’s very frustrating to me seeing you with another guy. Don’t you know that”. I was flabbergasted and speechless. I lose the grip of his hand and shake my head. “No, Liam. I don’t like you. I’m sorry but I only consider you as my brother. Not more than that,” I said to him. Liam looked gloomy and sad. I could not see him like that. So I left him alone and went home.

             Everything seems out of the blue. Liam confessed to me while I was still dating Lucas. I have a feeling for Lucas but not Liam. But, my honesty seems to break him very badly. It brings guilt to me. But, assuming that everything will be fine, I just pretend that nothing happened between me and Liam. Lucas and I kept meeting each other every day. I was so happy at the moment until I realize that I’ve been forgetting about Liam.

              One day, I heard a rumor that Liam was transferring to another school. I quickly look for him. But, I could not found him at all. I was very sad and anxious. Lucas came to me and said “Well, Ava. Actually, I was just fooling with you. I don’t have any feeling for you at all” he said while smirking at me. My heartfelt like being stab with thousand of knife. I fall to my knee as I heard him said that.  Lucas left me alone and do not turn back. Lonely and pain was the feeling that overflowed me at the moment. I cried my eyes out. Liam, my only best friend has left me and now Lucas was playing with my feeling. It was so overbearing.

             After a couple of hours, someone pat my head and said “Who made my best friend cry so hard, ha?”. I looked at the person and it was Liam. I stand up and hug him. “Liam! I’ve been looking for you everywhere. Don’t leave me” I whine at him. He hugged back and said that he would never leave me alone and will always be with me. I told him that Lucas was fooling me. He caresses me softly and said that he will take care of that. I felt very peaceful to hear that.

             Later, I found out that Lucas has a mental illness. That night when I saw him injured, he was hurting himself. He seems like a normal person sometimes but could be a very dangerous person. Lucas lived with his maids. His parents were busy with work and never cared about him. I kind of felt very sorry for him. He must be having a hard time alone. A couple of weeks later, Lucas has stopped school and has been sent to the mental hospital to get treatment.

             Liam and I were back to normal. But, this time Liam seems to become more charming. He changed his hairstyle and start to work out every day. Day by day, he becomes more charming and muscular. Liam also once said to me that he will wait until I have a feeling for him. I think I started to fell for him every day. He keeps making me blushing when he flirting with me. I just could not help myself.

             On the last day of school, Liam asked me to go to the park in front of our school after school. When I arrived, I saw no one there. So, I decided to wait until he came. Suddenly, someone closes my eyes and said “it’s me Liam. Don’t open your eyes, okay?” he said. I nodded. After a couple of minutes, I called Liam. But, no one reply. So, I open my eyes and saw the most gorgeous necklace I’ve ever seen.  Liam holds it while kneeling in front of me. “Ava, I know that I’m not the kindest and most handsome guy in the world. But, I will try my best to support you, cherish you, and love you. Will you be my girlfriend?” confessed Liam with his sweet and hopeful voice. I was so surprised and overwhelmed by his confession. I nodded and hug him. “Thank you for accepting me as your girlfriend even though you know about my Pinocchio symptom,” I said to him. He laughs and hugs me tightly. “Are you joking? For me, you are the best. I never cared about your weakness. I love you cause that you. Because I love everything about this girl named Ava” he said. My tears almost fall hearing his words. He let go of me and looked at my face. “Do you cry, my baby?” he asked me. I’m embarrassed and shake my head. Suddenly, I start to hiccup. Liam looked at me and laugh so hard. He then smiles at me and says, “Whatever you say, my Pinocchio girl. But, I will still love you no matter what you are”, he said. Today was the best day of my life. I never thought that Liam that I once thought of as a bother has become my boyfriend. I promise to never degrade myself and cherish every moment in my life. That all about me. Ava, a girl that could not lie.