“Are you coming tonight?” Her long, wispy hair blew into her eyes, and she gently nudged it away.
She batted her long, thick eyelashes pleadingly. Riley had a way of entrancing me. And yet again, I fell blindly into her trap.
“Fine,” I sighed, taking her outstretched hand.
Long, pale pink nails wrapped around my wrist, and she was pulling me along before I’d even registered what was happening.
We fell into a comfortable silence, nothing but our feet padding across the forest floor, leaves crunching beneath us. She broke it by letting a small giggle escape her plump lips, matching the colour of her nails.
I couldn’t help but laugh along – everything about her aura was contagious.
“Where are we going?” I asked, meeting her eyes.
The edges of her mouth twisted into a large smile. It dropped almost instantly as her body jerked, sending us toppling into the hard floor.
She landed on top of me and, uncontrollably laughing, planted a kiss on my forehead. The cool breeze was nothing compared to her warm breath on my neck.
Eventually, we got up, clinging to each other’s warmth.
Riley had tripped over a tree root. Grinning, she gently held my hand, leading me back into the forest’s depths.
After a bit of walking, the sound of music littered the air. The smell of grilled food wafted into my nostrils, and suddenly I was glad I came.
“You actually came!” Lexi exclaimed, hurrying up to us.
Her long, white dress billowed behind her as she embraced Riley. I had no doubt that she could smell the lavender scent from the perfume I’d got Riley last month. Lexi hated lavender, but she didn’t say anything.
I smiled awkwardly. Lexi had never seemed to really like me, so I wasn’t surprised that she didn’t even greet me before scurrying away.
“Dance with me!” Riley’s smile was bright, welcoming.
I felt like I was melting into my own blush, mind foggy with only her in sight.
We danced for hours, drinking the occasional spiked fruit punch. I was not socialising with anyone but the love of my life.
We kissed, sang, danced, all in wistful glee. Completely unaware of the suicide bomber creeping closer by the second.
Lexi, drunker than anyone else, wobbled over, wrapping her skinny hands around my neck, nudging Riley away. She smelt strongly of alcohol.
Before I knew what was happening, she kissed me. She wouldn’t let me go. I glanced at my girlfriend, pleading for forgiveness, despite the fact it wasn’t my fault. Riley just looked as though I’d slapped her.
Finally, Lexi pulled away. “I always avoided you for Riley’s sake, but you can’t deny the attraction.” She puckered her thin lips again.
I pushed her off, just in time to bolt after Riley, who had sprinted away, sobbing.
“That wasn’t me, baby,” I wheezed when she’d finally stopped, which happened to be in the centre of the party. “Lexi was drunk, don’t blame her either—” I was cut off.
“Oh, now you’re defending her?” Riley cried, mascara smudged on her perfect cheekbones. “I really thought we had something…” Her eyes were downcast, refusing to meet mine.
Before I could say anything else, Lexi reappeared, a psychopathic grin plastered across her delicate features.
All in one moment, she ripped open her dress, revealing heaps of bombs. She clicked a button and BOOM! I was flung backwards, hitting a tree with a nauseating crack. Pain seared up my left leg, and I cried out, head aching from the impact.
My leg was broken.
Around me, I heard screams, shouts, and pleas for help. I saw death, destruction, and chaos. I smelt smoke and discovered that the trees were alight.
We needed to get back to my house before the fire hit it, to warn my family. We… Riley!
“Riley!” I yelled above the frenzy around me. “Where is Riley?!”
That’s when I noticed the limp body spread in between two trees, the fire quickly engulfing them. Realisation struck, and I dragged the body away from danger, adrenaline ignoring the pain in my leg and coursing through my veins.
I laid her next to a broken popcorn stand. Riley… I stared at her closed eyes, the small smile she had when she was sleeping. Perhaps she was unconscious. I figured that wasn’t true when I saw the gaping hole where her arm used to be, and the blood pouring from it. I also saw the deep rip in her stomach, probably from trying to use a tree as safety.
She half-opened her eyes, the ghost of a smile playing on her lips. She saw me and frowned. A deep, burning hatred blazed in her gorgeously rounded eyes.
“I hate you.” Then, her lips stopped moving, and her head lolled back.
Grief hit me just like the bombs, but worse. My broken leg rested uselessly on the floor, refusing to let me run away.
The ringing in my ears grew louder, and tears formed in my eyes. I dismissed the pained headache and focused on my pained heart.
I thought about her last moments. The betrayal she must have felt. The helplessness must have hit when she realised her best friend had blown herself up. The loneliness she must have felt, lying there in her dying moments.
There, I sat. Weeping for my deceased girlfriend because she didn’t have enough time to do it for herself.
“I’m so sorry,” I whispered into her soft, well-conditioned hair.
It lay in waves on the ground, her head barely grazing the sandy floor. My heart was heavy, and that’s when I made my decision.
I thought about my life. How it lit up when Riley was around. How heartbroken she looked as Lexi’s tongue fought its way into my mouth.
I thought about my struggling grades. The way Riley tutored me. The excitement in her eyes as she celebrated the fact that I’d passed Math and could stay on the soccer team.
Now, soccer seemed so small and insignificant.
That when I decided that I would wait for the fire to engulf me to, the hands of death reaching out to take me.
I would stay with Riley. Forever.
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2 comments
Critique circle. Weird. I liked it. But. It could be crazier. I literally didn't know what was going on for the first... well, for any of it. Which was great, the psychopathic energy kept me reading. Are they in a forest? A beach? A party? She hit the floor, stumbled through leaves, brushed away sand, tripped over a root... But. The ending is a little prosy. I think (only my humble opinion) that if you hit the gas and went full on, ballstothewall crazy, it would be a better read, like Gibson's 'Neuromancer.' Cheers and keep writing. Ben
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Thanks so much! So I was going for they were leaving the protagonist's house and she leads them through a forest to the beach. When the explosion happens, it's so powerful that they are blown back into the forest around the beach. Yeah I got a little stumped at the end and I appreciate this critique! Thanks again.
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