Here’s A Bunny, “Tale” TO Make You, “Hoppy”

Here’s A Bunny, “Tale” TO Make You, “Hoppy”

Once upon a time in a huge metropolis called Danville, Va., there lived a little rabbit. When it was born her parents couldn't tell it’s sex so they figured if it was a female they’d name her Misty, or male, they’d name him Mister. The bunny was born into a huge colony of 10 bunnies. That meant whenever the children reached full-growth in a few weeks, out they went because it was to be expected that about 6 weeks later there would be a whole new slew of rabbits to bless this old Earth with. When the new-born were fresh-hatched, even the mamma couldn’t tell the sex of her children until they got bigger. That didn’t matter anyway since the bunnies had all co-ed places to potty. Their folks were eager for them to grow up so they could go out on their own and have their children cause them as much grief as they had given their folks. It’s called, “Pay-Back Time,” something every parent loves to see come, if they can live long enough to see it happen. They were on a strict deadline that needed to be met before he retired.

In 6 weeks the babies were old enough to go out on their own and start making families of their own. That was when Misty, or Mr. also was kicked out into the world, literally with those strong bunny leg muscles. Bunnies have 4 legs, no hands. That included Misty, or Mr. as well.

When spring time rolled around, it was time for all bunnies to go looking for places where they can call their, “home,” that’s a relative term, it’s where the heart is. The main thing they needed to be taught was how to get food for them and their families. Since they’re vegetarians who only eat plants, Misty, or Mister came to a tremendous orchard. It was full of veggies that were ripe and ready to be picked off and eaten. As Misty, or Mr. ran towards the huge guardian, suddenly she-he stepped in a rope and was instantly shot up into the air, leaving the poor little bunny hanging by one foot between Heaven and Earth. The bunny figured it was a trap that had been set up by Mr. McGregger, and sure enough, no sooner was the little bunny jerked upside-down hanging by one foot, then here came Mr. McGregger barreling down the path to where the rabbit hung upside down by her-his foot. Mr. McGregger was laughing hysterically at the poor, little creature hanging upside-down by one foot. It’s life was about to be shortened.

Here came mr. mcGregger. Barreling down the path, laughing hysterically at the poor, little varment who was obviously the victim in his filthy, terrible plan for him, laughing all the way.

“Aha!” he shouted pointing his index finger towards the poor, little varmint who was hanging upside-down by one front foot, “I’ve finally got you! This time you won’t get away! YOu’ve stolen the last vegetable from my guardian you ever will steal! I’ll call you, ‘turkey’ because you’re about to be cooked! You look like you’re really stewing! Well, soon you’ll be a, ‘rabbit-stew!’ Nobody will ever call you a, ‘grab-it rabbit’ any more after what I’ll do to you!”

It looked like the poor, little bunny was about to meet his Maker. Then he remembered his mama reading him those stories about Brer. Rabbit, Brer Fox and Brer Bear since Brer Rabbit always got out of the messes he was in by using his head, not his foots. He thought for a few seconds and then said, “well, if you really want to eat me, I can’t stop you, but I will warn you that if you do, the consequences will be ever so immensely worse than you can imagine!”

“Uh, tell me exactly what do you mean about the consequences being ever so immensely worse anyway?” asked Mr. McGregger with his eyes squinting down towards the little fir-ball with big legs and a tail, “I ain’t never heard no law about cooking varmints who eat my food!

I done read all the books with the laws in them! That ain’t one! What you talking ‘bout, Willace?”

“You’re right!” said Misty, or Mister, “It’s not in a book! That’s because the penalty is so severe it would really upset anybody who ever read it! That includes all rabbit-hunters on Earth!”

That made Mr. McGregger frown and put a finger on his upper lip, but before he could make any comments, he was instantly attacked by all of Mister, of Mr’s friends and relations. They had all come to save the bunny from a horrible fate. They all jumped on him and bit him with their razer-sharp teeth and kicked him with their really strong leg-muscles. There were more of them than could be counted, and they came from all sides. That caused the poor farmer to cry out in pain numerous times. Finally, he ran into the woods, screaming all the way. That made all the gang erupt with maniacal laughter, including the little victim. When they finally stopped laughing, they untied the rabbit from the spit. Then they chorused, “Why can’t you stay out of trouble for even a few minutes anyway, Bro., Sis?” That made our little heroine frown, but the frown was really short-lived since it was quickly replaced by an even bigger smile. Then the others untied their little victim. They wanted their little relative to iron the bugs out of any plan before executing it from that point on. Being amongst all the delicious fruits and veggies, they had a huge feast in honor of their little victim whom they had just saved from an awful fate. They called the little bunny, “The Mast Of Disaster,” saying to iron the bugs out of any plans before acting upon them. Then they promised if it did that, they’d have to change it’s name to, “Bugs-Bunny.” At any rate, as all best-written children’s stories will officially finnish up with,

“THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!!” The end.

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By, Cuz Roye, ….1-434-849-8268.