Emileigh

Before checking with her brain, her hand slowly reached up to touch his cheek. A somewhat happy confusion clouded his eyes and face, as if he wanted it and yet had no idea why the feeling had come upon him. He raised his hand and touched it to hers tentatively and, as though his fingertips were etched in electricity, the feeling of his skin whispering across her own jolted Emileigh's mind into focus. Her warm smile faded to crimson embarrassment as she pulled her hand away from him and turned her back to him, not certain what to say.

Suddenly, forgetting the proper etiquette that had been drilled into her since birth, Emileigh took off running through the castle toward the garden. He called and reached out to her, but his voice was distant, muffled by her shame and terror. His words seemed to fall to the ground in the air that separated them, losing themselves somewhere on their journey to her ears.

She flew past her parents, who were sitting in meditative idleness on a bench in the royal garden. She ran through the maze that was her mother's rose bushes, racing toward her willow tree. The tree served as her secret place, one that she could escape to and one that she often used to hide from the many burdens of being the king's daughter. The tree kept her safe by enclosing her in its long, draping leaves. She was never afraid when she was underneath that willow.

Emileigh finally found herself at the tree and collapsed as all of the breaths that she hadn't been taking threatened to suffocate her. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and she felt that her heart was being ripped out of her. After her breathing regulated itself and her heart found a quiet, steady beat at which to pulse, she leaned against the trunk of the tree, contemplating what exactly had just occurred between her and the only boy that she had ever been close to, the one she had known her entire life. Jakob. Sweet, sensitive, understanding Jakob.

She felt her eyes glaze over in fear, concern and something else that she couldn't name – she was not certain what this meant for them. Things between them had been platonic for so long that she had begun to think that that was how their relationship was always going to be. But, especially recently, she had started feeling a tug of something a little deeper beginning to emerge between them – something new and raw and immature in its growth, and yet it was there. It was a bond bringing the two even closer than they already were.

And they were intensely connected as it was. Since they had been young children, running together and playing hide-and-seek throughout the labyrinth of the castle, they had been the best of friends. Their parents had hoped for an eventual wedding, but when both had reached the tender age of eighteen and had yet to fall in love with one another, they gave up hope. Now, it seemed to Emileigh that their parents had known what lay in their hearts after all.

If only she were not betrothed to another man.

Emileigh sat in silence, praying to God for a sign to let her know what she was supposed to do, for in herself she found only murky, muddled, confused answers to her questions. The only reply she received (in that moment anyway) was the sound of two blue jays chirping insanely from somewhere else in the garden, and in their song she found little comfort.

With a sullen sigh, Emileigh allowed her eyes to slowly shut out the world. Her mind screamed for a moment of peace, a moment where nothing was plaguing her and no one expected her to do or be anything more than a simple human being. Was that not what she was? True, the surname "Ackhart" entitled her to several luxuries that, truth be told, she would rather not give up, but every person has a name. Therefore, because she has a name, is she not a person as well and warranted the rights to be let alone? Why must she constantly be insisted upon with stubborn orders and unrealistic anticipation? Is she no longer allowed to act like the child that she is?

"Emileigh? Emileigh, are you alright?"

His voice reached into her thoughts, pulling her focus back to world she felt so unfortunate to consider tangible.

"Emileigh? I know you are under there. Do you not remember that I have known you since before our memories can recall?"

Her eyelids snapped open, and with great reluctance she returned to reality.

"If you know that I am under here," she replied rather smartly. "Why then, pray tell, have you not entered my domain?"

With this, Jakob pushed aside a few strands of willow leaves and walked to her side, sliding down to the grass beside her.

"I, unlike you," Jakob said with a smile creeping into the corners of his mouth. "Have manners, even if they are few. I did not want to intrude upon you if you thought ill of me, as you seemed to just a few moments ago."

"I could never think ill of you, Jakob," Emileigh's tone hinted at a hidden sadness. Then, in a total alteration of emotion, she playfully hit his shoulder. "Unless, that is, you married a horrible wench from the France or something. Of which, I am sure you will never even dare to attempt."

"Oh, really?" Jakob leaned in close to her face, staring into her eyes. "Well, you are right. I would never attempt to marry any woman from that horrid country."

"I thought so," Emileigh was consciously aware of how close his mouth was to hers, and even more aware of how dearly she wished to close the gap between them.

"Why would I?" Jakob said, as that sly smile of his found its place on his face once more. "There is a plethora of wonderfully divine English wenches who are perfectly willing to, dare I say-"

"Jakob!" Emileigh pushed him out of her face and laughed quietly, for she knew when his jokes held no truth to them as this one did. "You are positively dreadful."

"Ah, you see, and yet you still find a dear place in your heart for me, despite this well known fact," Jakob replied cleverly. "Why is this, my friend? Is it because you have known me for your entire lifetime and would feel absolutely terrible for betraying that friendship? Or is it because you see all of my human flaws and therefore pity my pathetic soul? It must be one of these, for there is not the slightest chance you truly like me."

"Well in all these you are wrong, dear," Emileigh said, looking into his playful eyes with all sincerity. "You are one of my most precious, most trusted friends. How could possibly think otherwise?"

"I do not know," Jakob said. "Because I did not think that of you. It was a jest, Emileigh."

"Jakob, you most certainly shall be my undoing," Emileigh looked away from him, completely consumed with the fact that should could not clearly read him. She was quickly losing control due to her mind being elsewhere. She was not a fragile being and yet she suddenly felt like an egg with no protection from predators. She felt as though she could break at any given moment.

"Emileigh?" his tone was genuine, drawing her eyes to his honest face. The sly smile was gone.

"Yes, Jakob?"

"May I ask you a question, even if I fear that you do not want to answer it or your answer will not be what I wish to hear?"

A moment's hesitation stretched between them. The moment alone struck a chord of fear in Jakob and he was frightened by his sudden instance of blunt curiosity.

Instinct told Emileigh to allow him his question. Instinct also told her what the question was and that maybe, it would bring her the happiness she would most certainly desire. But logic told her that, should he ask the question that she was thinking of, havoc would befall the entire situation with her fiancé. How could she be willing to risk losing a guarantee?

"Yes, you may, Jakob," Emileigh was going with her intuition.

"A few moments ago," he started. "Before you retreated here, when we were inside the castle together. Something occurred there that I for one never anticipated."

Emileigh's heart sank. He had not felt the pulsing desire to be closer as she had.

"Not to say that I did not long for it." Her heart rose again. "On the contrary, since we were children, I have often dreamed of taking the next step in our relationship."

"But?" Emileigh could it hear in the silence left behind after his words.

"But…Emileigh, let's at least attempt to be realistic. Our romance would be forbidden. You are a princess, about to inherit an entire kingdom to rule with a superior guidance passed down to you through your family's lineage. But what am I beyond the son of a duke? It is true that our parents wanted our union when we were children but could they honestly grow to accept it? Especially considering your current engagement, I am afraid that we would merely be frowned upon."

"What are you proposing that we do then. Jakob?" Emileigh finally found her voice. "Deny that we have feelings for one another? Though I did not know they were there until this afternoon, there is no forgetting them now. I can not – nor will I – bring myself to marry Seamus. Jakob, as you said we have known each other since before our minds can recall. You know me in ways that no one could possibly fathom. Please tell me that you will give our hearts a chance to fall in love. Should time pass and neither of us feel that love that we crave, then we shall return to our stations as merely friends. Agreed?"

Jakob glanced into her eyes and saw the desperate truth and deep passion she felt and took her hands in his.

"Agreed," Jakob whispered. "Though one thing still concerns me."

"What?"

"What are you going to tell Seamus? Your parents?"

Emileigh took a second to think, wondering the same things.

"The truth," Emileigh replied confidently. "That there is someone else in this world that means so much more to me than a perfect stranger from the north."