Coulrophobia

August 2016

“It’s all fun and games until you get punched in the face. You definitely deserved that!” Sera Canister berated her brother.

 The small group was driving home from a party. Sera took a detour on a road through the roads. She didn’t feel like driving in traffic. Especially after the incident at the party. Javier was in the back seat, wearing a creepy clown costume. He held a bloodied washcloth to his nose. 

“This whole clown frenzy has everyone on edge and you decide to use it to your advantage! And not only that, you dragged Ernest with you! No offense Ernest, you may be sweet, but you are simple!” Sera told him.

 Ernest tilted his head in confusion. He was wearing a second clown costume. This one looked friendlier than Javier’s.

“Um… none taken?” he replied.

  Sera nodded.

“And Helen? You need to chill out.” Sera told her.

Javier laughed.

“I thwear, you coult hear thath thweeb id Peru!” he chuckled.

“Javier! Zip it! I’m telling Mom that she raised an idiot!” Sera snapped.

  Helen glared at the two men. Her blue eyes filled with rage and embarrassment.

“You guys know I’m scared of clowns!” she snapped.

  Sera turned to look at her.

“No offense, Helen, but there is no way you’d catch me losing my crap over a– GAH!”

  There was a figure on the road. Sera slammed on the brakes. It was too late. The body toppled over her hood and rolled off. Everyone froze.

“I think you just killed someone!” Helen shrieked.

  Sera shook her head.

“Th-That– That could have been a deer!” she replied.

   “Thera! How many deerth are baby blue?!” Javier asked.

  Ernest unbuckled his seatbelt.

“We need to go check on who or whatever it is! We might need to take them to the hospital!” He replied.

  Sera got out of the car, followed by Javier and Ernest.

“I am not getting out of this car!” Helen told them. 

Sera rolled her eyes. She looked at the hood.

“That’s a lot of blood…” She whispered.

“Do you hear cryink?” Javier asked.

  Everyone froze. Helen shifted to the driver’s side. It sounded like a child crying. They followed the noise to the culprit who was sitting on the side of the road. It was a young girl. Her face was covered in long blonde hair that cascaded into neat curls. She wore a baby blue party dress and red tap shoes. She was sitting, head on her knees.

“Are you okay?” Sera asked.

  The girl didn’t answer. She kept on crying. Sera pulled out her phone to dial an ambulance.

“Do you need a doctor?” Ernest asked.

“No thee needth a pardy planner.” Javier said sarcastically.

  The girl stopped crying. She stood up slowly. She took a careful step. Then another. And another. Sera looked up and backed away. The two men followed. There was definitely something not right.

“Um…” she said out loud.

 The girl stumbled over and caught herself. She looked back up at them. She slowly parted her hair. Everyone screamed. The girl had red orbs for eyes and a wide mouth full of sharp teeth. She also had clown makeup on. Sera and Javier ran back to the car. Ernest ran down the road.

“What are you doing?! Get in the flipping car!” Sera shouted at him.

  Ernest turned around and tossed himself in the car. As soon as all of the doors were closed, Helen locked the doors. She tried to start the car again.

“IT WON’T START!” Helen screamed.

“KEEP TRYING! JAVIER! I TOLD YOU THIS THING WAS A LEMON!” Sera shouted.

  Helen turned the key again. Nothing.

“Wait! Where did she go?!” Ernest asked.

  Everyone froze. There was pounding on the roof.

“Thee teleported!” Javier replied.

  The girl’s maniacal face appeared in front of them upside down. She was giggling loudly.

“I am not dying today!” Sera snapped.

  She hotwired the car. The car roared to life. Helen slammed on the gas, launching the monstrous girl off. She stood up and ran after them until they were in town. Sera breathed a sigh of relief as she saw the city lights.

“Helen, I owe you an apology.” Sera whispered.

  Helen nodded.

“Apology accepted.” she replied.

Sera and Helen were back in their apartment. Ernest and Javier sat on the couch, waiting for their roommates to pick them up. They both didn’t feel safe driving home alone. Helen was stuffing popcorn in her mouth. Sera was calling the police.

“Yeah, down Creek road. She wore a blue party dress– and what do you mean you’re busy? This is the seventh clown call you got this night?” she asked.

Helen shoved the last handful of popcorn in her mouth. She stood up to get more.

“Helen! Lay off the popcorn!” Sera snapped.

  Sera rolled her eyes.

“I’m sorry, my roommate just ate her fourth bowl of popcorn…” she informed the dispatcher.

  Ernest rubbed his chin.

“Maybe it was just a person in a creepy costume,” he theorized.

Javier had a bandage on his nose now.

“There is no way! Who recovers that quickly from being hit by a car then sprints after us like a track star?! This is some supernatural Steven King kind of crap!” he replied.

  Helen grabbed a candy bar.

“Well, whatever it was, I’m glad we’re away from it.” she said as she bit into the candy bar.

“Helen! That’s not a healthy way to deal with your feelings!” Sera snapped.

  She hung up the phone.

“We are going to the police department.” Sera announced.

Ernest looked surprised.

“Why?” he asked.

  Sera shrugged.

“I wanted to make sure they’ll actually deal with it.” she replied.

  Javier rolled his eyes.

“Come on, let's go with her in case she causes any trouble.” he droned.

  They walked out the door. 

“Did you wipe off the blood?” Helen asked.

Sera nodded.

“Yup. Not my first time wiping blood off something.” she replied.

  Ernest froze.

“Guys… What’s that?” Ernest asked.

  In the distance was a clown-like figure. He held up a chainsaw and smiled at them.

“FREAKING BOOK IT!” Sera screamed.

  The group ran to the car and drove off. The clown chuckled.