Today's the day. They day I finally do it. I’d made a promise to myself that on the first day of spring I would do it. And so today I’m going to do it.
“It’s not that hard just do it,” I told myself steeling my nerves for what's ahead. I rolled out of bed with the knowledge of today I would do it. No backing out today I would finally do it.
I grabbed my jacket and a banana and headed out the door to get the stuff I needed. The whole way there I had my headphones in and was in the deepest mood of my life. I had made my decision and I was going to follow through. I had already prepared it for the most part. I had written the letters and they were laying on my desk at home. I had given my most valuable stuff away and was ready to accept my fate. I continued my arduous trek to get the last final things.
My pay check was in my hand, it was the last one as I had recently quit my job and I headed to the bank to cash it in. Upon arriving I began to notice the change in the weather as winter was leaving. How fitting, as the old season left this earth so would I. As a new season would dawn the season of my life would come to it’s sorry end.
So many people, too many. Oh how crowded this earth had become. If only a few were removed. It would make more space for the rest. More food for everyone and quality of life would improve. Oh well, it wasn’t my problem anymore.
Finally I reached the front of the line.
“Hello, how may I help you today,” came a voice from behind the counter, the words littered with obvious discontentment.
“I umm need to cash this check,” I said without lifting my eyes from off the ground.
The clerk cashed the check and handed my back the measly amount of money.
“Thanks,” I said as I left the booth. I began my trek once again towards the inevitable task I had set for myself. If you asked me where this task came from I would probably have given you a thousand excuses. In all honesty I don’t know. It was kind of there one day. It overwhelmed me to the point I found joy in nothing. At some point I just decided I had had enough. So voila the task. The task that now governed my life and told my feet where to step. Step, step, step, inching onwards towards my doom, step, step, step.
Eventually I found myself outside a gun shop. It was a little shop nothing much really, but I wasn’ looking for something ornate it would have what I needed. I steeled myself to enter the store when I heard a voice.
“Susie get back here.” I turned on a dime past years of military training kicking in. I saw a woman chasing her dog who had obviously broken free of her grasp. My feet forgot their task and dashed after the dog as I swiftly jumped onto it as it grew closer to the street.
“Got ya, ya little bugger,” I said before I even knew the words came out of my mouth. I began to pick myself up as the girl came over. I caught my first good look at her and she was stunning. It was the kind of moment that you see in the movies. Her hair seemed to blow like an extra was standing just out of shot with a hair blower. My jaw was so wide you could’ve stuck a whole movie script in it.
“Oh my God thank you!” The girl said as she grew closer. “I was afraid she was going to take off into the traffic.”
“Huh, oh yeah, you're welcome,” I said, not fully sure of what had just happened. One second I was standing in front of the gun store and the next the most beautiful woman I had ever seen was standing here staring at me. Wait, why's she staring at me. Oh the dog!
“Here you go miss…”
“Mary,” she said in the most adorable country girl accent.
“Here you go miss Mary.”
“Thank you, so much. You're my hero.” Hero… I hadn’t heard that word in a while. I remember hearing it on the way out as they loaded my wounded buddy into the helicopter. They said I saved lives, but the only one that mattered to me was my brother and I couldn't save his. Suddenly I remembered why I was here.
“No problem, but I really have to go.”
“Nonsense, you saved my dog I owe you, and you aren’t going anywhere till I pay you back.”
“I’m sorry miss but I really must be going,” I said half wanting her to stop me.
“Yeah right, you're not going anywhere. I always repay my debts.” She half dragged my down the street as the store grew further and further away.
“We’re going to diner down the street, you save my dog, the least I can do is buy you some lunch.” Lunch all of a sudden I was paying attention to her again. The banana was long gone and I was starving.
“I mean if you’re offering food I’m not going to say no.”
“Thought so.” She picked up her pace and I had to jog to keep up with her. Jogging beside her I began to notice her beauty once again. She was stunning the air blew perfectly through her golden blond hair as she practically ran towards the dinner. I nearly tripped over a fire hydrant as I watched her run with not a care in a world.
“Watch yourself, don’t want you to fall.” She said without looking back.
We finally reached the dinner and I had the best meal of my life. We laughed and joked the whole time. Mary was what had been missing from my life, joy. We spent the whole day just exploring the city and walking on the boardwalk. It was magnificent and as the sun set over the beach, we took a seat on a nearby bench. Orange hues broke through the sky and we just sat there watching it go down. As for the task, today wasn’t the day and I don’t think that day ever will come.