Over a Cup of Tea

Over a Cup of Tea

“Well, how are we going to do this?” Eliza questioned. “I mean, do we go to a fertility clinic and get artificially inseminated, or what?” And then, before Kate could answer, she added, “And who is the father going to be?”

After swallowing the bite of Belgian Waffle Kate had in her mouth, she said, “I don’t know, Honey. I really don’t know. I think I’m okay with the whole artificial insemination thing. What worries me more is not knowing whose DNA I’d be getting.”

“So, the turkey baster is fine; it’s just a matter of the donor.”

“Exactly,” Kate confirms as she crams a piece of bacon into her mouth.

Several days passed with little additional discussion of who the father would be. But it was never far from Kate’s mind. As Thursday rolled around and the girls snuggled into bed together, Eliza finally asked, “So, have you been thinking of any potential dad we could ask for a test tube of sperm?”

“Yes and no,” Kate responded as she turned to her side to face Eliza in the dark of their room. “I’ve decided I don’t want an anonymous donor. This is a life-altering event for us, and I don’t want to take any chances with a stranger’s seed. We could get some total whacko. I’ve been Googling stories of people who have done that and regretted it. Those sperm banks are not the most reliable institutions. There is a case of some doctor in Michigan that fathered over a hundred kids with his own sperm and told the parents that it was from an anonymous donor from a well-respected sperm bank.”

“How did they ever find out?” Eliza questioned.

“DNA testing. Some of the kids, after they became adults, started doing their DNA family tree, and they kept tracing back to this same doctor.”

“Okay,” Eliza said as she turned to face Kate. “I get it, and I agree. I would also feel more comfortable knowing our baby’s genetic heritage. But how are we going to do that? What male relative or friend of ours is going to Jack-off in a bottle for us.”

Kate laughed and began to stroke Eliza’s hair. With their faces only inches apart, Kate asked, “What about your family? Who could we approach?”

Eliza laughed. “Oh my God. Kate, I’ve done everything possible to protect you from my family. As you know, I’m an only child. No siblings. On my mother’s side, they’re all religious wackos. My mother was raised Catholic, but at some point, most of my aunts, uncles and cousins have morphed to become right-wing evangelicals. The Pope was too liberal for most of them. Then on my father’s side, they’re all red-neck Hillbillies. There’s not a single one of them that wouldn’t screw you raw, as long as they could do it on Jerry Springer Live.”

Just the image of that got Kate laughing. And soon Eliza was kissing her passionately. Leading quickly to another night of torrid sex.

Another week went by, with only occasional references to the baby issue. However, the following Sunday at brunch, Eliza finally asked, “Kate, what about your brother, Lance?”

“Eww, no, he’s my brother. Even if it’s done artificially, it’s still incest. I mean, we are blood siblings. There could be all kinds of genetic issues.”

“Okay, okay,” Eliza concurred. There was a short pause before she took both of Kate’s hands and said, “What if I carry the baby? You know, be the surrogate for both of us.”

Now, Eliza always knew she was gay. She never dated boys and certainly never considered having a baby. But Eliza had never been in love like she is now with Kate. So, this did add a perspective to her life that she had never considered. There was a long pause as Kate just stared at her. “Kate, I promise you will be the mom. It will just be your brother’s seed and my egg, and it will forever be our kid. And our kid will have two of the most loving moms any kid could ever have.”

Kate continued to stare at Eliza for a good two minutes before slowly pulling her hands back. “We haven’t approached Lance yet,” she said as her eyes began to fill with tears.

Eliza’s face lightened at the prospect that at least Kate would consider the idea. “Do you think he would do it?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” Kate replied as she took another sip of her Mimosa. “Why don’t we invite him to dinner?”

Eliza had always liked Lance. He was several years older than Kate and had always seemed like the perfect big brother. He was handsome, college educated, single with no steady girlfriends, and most importantly, he was very open-minded—not like any of Eliza’s relatives.

Kate invited him over for dinner the following weekend and subtly informed him that he was to come alone. Lance probably thought that he was being set up for some sort of blind date. And was he ever right.

Kate prepared Lance his favorite dinner, and as Eliza plied him with alcohol, the trap was set. As candlelight flickered and wine flowed freely, Kate finally said, “Lance, Eliza, and I love you very much. And we have an incredible favor to ask of you.”

This wasn’t exactly what Lance was expecting, but he knew something was brewing with these two. Swallowing hard, he asked, “What?”

Eliza and Kate looked at each other nervously. “We want to start a family,” they both said in unison. Kate put her hand over Eliza’s and continued. “We mean that we want to have a baby. And we have been contemplating who would be the best candidate to be the father—if you know what we mean.”

“Yes,” Lance said, in shock over the implication. “You want me to provide the sperm for your love child.”

Eliza interrupted, “Yes. And Lance, I’ll be the one carrying the baby—not Kate. So, there won’t be any issue with incest. And we can do it at a fertilization clinic or a doctor’s office of your choice. And we can go to a lawyer and have a legally binding agreement drawn up to relieve you of any and all fraternal responsibilities and obligations.”

Kate grabbed Eliza’s hand, and as the two young women peered into Lance’s eyes, they could see the wheels turning as Lance contemplated his answer. “I don’t know, girls. I love you both, but that’s a big favor to ask. A really big favor.”

“Well, will you at least think about it, Lance,” Kate begged. “To paraphrase Princess Leia, ‘You are our last hope, Obi-Wan Lancenobi.’”

Lance laughed at that, and the three finished off another bottle of wine before he kissed them both on the cheek and left for the evening.

The girls didn’t hear from Lance for three days, but Lance texted his sister the following Tuesday, ‘Can you meet me for a cup of tea?’

Kate immediately texted back, ‘Of course.’ But she was afraid the news was not going to be good. She didn’t text or call Eliza because she wasn’t sure what Lance had to say. She decided to wait and see before informing her partner.

Kate met Lance at the Enchanted Cup, a tea shop where they frequently met for a mid-morning break. Lance was already there. He had ordered a pot of Darjeeling, which was sitting in the center of the table, steeping as Kate walked in. She was as nervous as she had ever been in her life, but she smiled as she took a seat opposite her brother. Looking up into his eyes as he poured her a cup, Kate couldn’t read his facial expression. So, she still had no more of an idea about his decision than she did when he texted her before she left her office.

Lance knew she was nervous and quickly spoke: “Kate, I’ve come to a decision. I’ll do it, but under several conditions.”

Kate wanted to jump out of her chair and hug him, but she restrained herself long enough to say, “Yes, yes—we agree.”

“Wait,” Lance insisted as he held up his open palm. “I think you’ll agree with this, but here are my conditions: no doctors, no clinics, no turkey basters. I’m not a racehorse or some prized bull. We’ll do it the natural way.” Kate’s face started to drop. “With you in the room. Eliza is not my girlfriend—she is yours. So, I’ll be your stud—but only with you holding her hand.”

This was not what Kate was expecting. But she realized they were in negotiations here. So, she wanted to hear him out. Of course, such a decision would also require Eliza’s approval. But she thought that it was at least possible. “Okay,” Kate said tentatively. “Of course, I’ll have to ask Eliza.”

“Oh, absolutely,” Lance insisted. “And one more thing. No lawyers. The three of us can draw up a simple agreement. We can all sign it. And that will be that: no lawyers, no doctors, no clinics. No one needs to know anything about this but the three of us. And when the kid is grown, if he or she wants to know who their biological father is, well then, that’s fine. But until then, it’s just between us. I’m just Uncle Lance, at least until the kid is an adult.”

The smile quickly returned to Kate’s face. She leaned across the table and gave Lance a quick peck on the cheek. “Thank you, Lance. Thank you. Of course, I’ll have to talk to Eliza, but I think she’ll agree.”

Walking back to her office, Kate couldn’t help but call Eliza. “Oh my God,” she exclaimed as Eliza picked up her phone. “He said yes, he said yes.” Kate paused momentarily before adding the caveat, “Now, there are a few conditions, but I think it is all stuff we can agree with.”

“Like what?” Eliza interjected.