Writer's Blockade

The smell of coffee beans, nestled into his mustache. Click-clack, click-clack, click-click-click-click. The, all-too-familiar, sound of the backspace key being pressed repeatedly. The early morning gray, the midnight black. Heavy eyes, aching fingers, growling stomach, jumbled head.

A not-so-young, down-and-going, writer struggles to put his brain to his keyboard. His ideas are always amazing, in theory. His concepts have the potential to be fantastic stories but as soon as he begins to write, he can't figure out how to bring it together. There's been a concept brewing in his mind, for years. It's a four part, science fiction, book series. Maybe being an author just isn't in the cards for him.

Outside of being perceived as a failure, our writer has but a few fears in life. His friends, one day, decide to dare him to encounter one of these fears. During a late night, birthday, celebration, a daddy long-leg makes it's way up a wall. A loud screech leaves his mouth, the moment that his eyes make contact with the eight-legged critter. Arachnophobia has been one of his main fears since childhood. No matter how big or small that the spider may be, it mustn't be anywhere near him.

Highly buzzed, these long time buds of his decide that it would be hilarious to mess with our novelist. They've all been, great, friends since childhood. A group of outcasts and "weirdos", but they've always had each other. His loved ones are the only thing he values more than his dreams. As much as they enjoy to show each other love, they enjoy annoying each other just as much. Like a true family.

"Hey, man. I think it's time we tackle this phobia of yours. It's just a friendly, little guy", someone says with a snicker. Everyone else joins in "Yeah! Come on, here just hold the spider in your hands for ten seconds", another voice shouts. "You know what? I'll give you fifty dollars, right now, if you eat it", the group erupts in laughter. A little drunk himself, he's had it with the decades long banter over his fear of spiders. Before they could even finish enjoying their jest, he snatches the creature off of the wall and pops it into his mouth. He opens his mouth, wide, for proof of what he'd just done. "There! Now where's my money?!". The silence in the room was drown out by the loudness of the shock on everyone's faces.

The very next morning, he opens his laptop. Click-clack, click-clack, click.. Something was different. The, treacherous, backspace key wasn't being hit. Keep going. A glance at the clock startled him, as he realized that hours had flown by. "Are my ideas actually flowing onto 'paper'?". By the end of the day, he'd made more progress than the past few months combined. Another morning approaches, excited to continue the strides that he made the previous day. Click-clack, click-clack, click-click-click. The recognizable feeling of writer's block had fully set back in. Maybe it was a fluke.

Mr. Semi Writer has always been a smidge superstitious. As the night sky approaches, he gets the craziest thought. "Maybe the spider got my brain flowing", brushing it off as a silly notion. Soon, that silly notion became a heap of anxiety, "what if?". He searches every corner of his home to try and locate another spider for him to consume. He spots one in the corner of his garage and swallows it before he can even think about how disgusting this is. Straight to his laptop, he marches. His thoughts, flowing through the screen like water. He feels a sense of euphoria, "Finally? Am I finally going to be able to do it?". He uses the fifty dollars he acquired from his friend's bet to purchase a pet tarantula. It sat by his side over the next couple of months, one hand typing away, the other giving his good luck charm occasional pets.

Completion. Relief. Success. After churning out his long hindered novel, it became an overnight success. Exactly the way he envisioned it. Just, many, many years later. All of his fantastic ideas came to fruition and brought even more acclaim than he envisioned. A number one selling book, in the genre. A huge fan base who can't wait for the next installment. To his surprise, he relished in the fame and notoriety more than anticipated. He thought the joy would just come from finishing his project, but now he's loving the lifestyle that has come with it.

It's been a year since the release of his book, and the people need more. He finally settles down from the excitement of his newfound success and decides to begin writing the sequel. With the help of his lovely pet, it'll be finished in no time. Click.. click.. click. A familiar sensation. Click.. click.. click. He thinks he may need to show it more affection. Nothing seems to be working, was it all just a coincidence? Or maybe he needs to do more. Something new. A different fear to face.

He wonders what else could he tackle? What else has he always been afraid of? Heights. He starts off with trying out a diving board. It took an hour of self prep talk but he eventually jumped off and into the water. Another productive day of writing. Eventually, the diving board stopped bringing results. Bungee jumping. More results. At the peak of this writing cycle, he even resorted to sky diving for the first time. He may have feinted as soon as the instructor jumped, but he did it. And it worked. Book number two, complete.

Another hit. There's even murmurs of directors wanting to adapt this book series into movies. Let's not stop the momentum now, he has to strike while it's hot. No time off, book three must begin now. By now, he realizes that he must continually increase the intensity of his fears to keep the creative juices flowing. But what's next? What could be crazier than sky diving, that doesn't kill him?

Well, this might actually kill him. Attempting to date. Almost the scariest thing in the world. He's always been anxious, awkward, shy. The idea of "putting himself out there" is terrifying. But a book must be written, right? He decides to try dating apps for the first time in his life. It may take him longer to find a match than it would to write the book by conventional methods. A month later, he finally sets up a date. If he feinted before jumping off of the plane, he may be induced into a coma while waiting for his date to arrive to dinner. The date went terribly. But the writing session that night went amazingly.

Over the course of Summer, he went on a dozen dates. None of them panned out, and he did actually try to put his best efforts into meeting someone he clicked with. But by the end of the season, book three was done. Almost there. Just one more and he can finally sit back and enjoy peace and comfort. Reflecting, he lost bit of sight on the root of his passion.

It took a long, silent, session with his own thoughts to conjure up a conduit for his fourth installment. What would bring him the most discomfort? Being alone. Losing his friends. At first, he thought, "well, I could just distance myself from them for a few months until I finish this thing". But then paranoia set in. "If I bring them back into my life, afterwards, would that negate everything? Would it undo the success of the fourth book? Would it need to be a permanent separation from my friends?". Would it be worth it? Technically, without them, I would have never even begun this journey. Even if it was just via their cruel sense of humor".

Our successful writer began to compare his life from before and after his career took off. Did he have more joy spending nights being weird with his friends? Or the feeling of not being perceived as a failure?

Twelve years later, the celebration of the fifteenth anniversary of book one. Highly regarded as a classic beginning of a classic series. Written by an amazing author, who's been on hiatus for about a decade now. To this day, his fans debate about when the final novel will be released.