“The D Word”

I’m scared.  My name is Ralph and I’m scared.  Mommy and Daddy are yelling at each other more lately and they’ve even mentioned something called, “the D word”.  They don’t think I know what, “the D word” is, but I do.  I do.  “The D word” is dog.  See, I’m a Pomeranian and they don’t have any real children, so I’m their child, and they used to pet me and play with me, but now Mike and Helena only pet me after they argue and cry and they never pet me together anymore.  One time they even argued about who I should comfort and give my lovings to.  I’m “the D word”.  

Mommy, Daddy, and me used to all sleep in the bed together.  I’d guard the bed by sleeping at the foot of the bed and keep everyone safe.  Now, though, Daddy sleeps on the couch downstairs with a blanket and a pillow and Mommy has the big bed all to herself, because of me, “The D word”.  Sometimes Mommy walks me and sometimes Daddy walks me.  I still get scraps from the table, but they eat at different times now.  I shiver in fear more when they’re together and arguing though.  I wish I was a cat, then they wouldn’t be arguing.

Then, Mommy and Daddy cross paths and Mommy says she needs to talk to her At Tour Knee about who is going to get to keep what.  Mommy’s going to be moving back with her Mommy and she wants to take a lot of things.  See, Mommy spends a lot of time petting me, talking to me, and comforting me, during scary thunderstorms and other times too. Daddy tries to, but he doesn’t do as good a job as Mommy.  Mommy also gives me the leftover pot when she’s done cooking.  I know this sounds bad, but I love Mommy more than Daddy.  I do love Daddy and miss him, but I love Mommy more, and now Mommy’s leaving because of me, “The D word”.  

I know us dogs are supposed to be brave and protect our abodes and I’m trying, but it’s hard when I’m the one who’s the problem.  Then, they talk about who is going to take me, Ralph.  Daddy says that he bought me with his money.  I don’t remember that.  I just always remember being in this home.  And that because he bought me, I should stay in this house.  Mommy says that I love her more, which is true, so I should stay with her.  There’s a lot of shouting and Daddy almost punches Mommy, but he doesn’t, and it’s all because of me, “the D word”.

Mommy says she’s taking Daddy to a court, which is where Mommy and Daddy play tennis, to decide whether Mommy or Daddy will keep me.  I wish they’d just stay together, but if I had to choose, I’d choose Mommy. 

A few weeks go by and Mommy packs up three suitcases and a lot of boxes.  I wag my tail and follow her and hope she’ll put me in one of the boxes, so I can go with her, but she doesn’t.  She and some strong white men load the boxes into a big truck, which Mommy says is from U-Haul.  It takes five hours to load this truck.  Then, she picks me up and I’m excited I’m going with her.  She hugs me tight and says she loves me and says I can see her on  weekends and then she puts me down and leaves me at this home.  I wish I knew how not to be a dog, because then “The D word” wouldn’t be a factor and Mommy and Daddy wouldn’t be fighting and we could all stay together in this home and be happy, but I can’t change that I’m a dog, because, I don’t know, I just can’t.  I just can’t.  I’m a dog.  That’s what I am.  That’s all I am. I’m a dog.