The Magic of Mushrooms

**SUICIDAL IDEATIONS, MAGIC MUSHROOMS**

On the precipice of the rusted copper arch of the Sienna Bridge in Solstead, Virginia, Vanessa Landon's lithe legs dangled over the brink of her fate. Delicate gusts of warm air flirted with the golden-brown wisps of hair around her sallow face. She sat on the rugged wooden planks beneath her, stabilizing her vulnerability. Her slim, tanned piano fingers grasped tight, the tension palpable in the stark contrast of her pale knuckles against her olive skin. Above her, the sun cast a remarkable dulcet glow that saturated the panoramic view. Yet Vanessa Landon remained oblivious to this breathtaking display. Her gaze fixated on the Prussian blue waters of the Sienna River below.

Vanessa had been sitting there for what felt like hours, torn between the desperate urge to plunge and the fear of the unknown if she did. Obtrusive thoughts obstructed her judgment as rushing water flooded her ears while teetering on the cusp of a life-altering decision. The river seemed to beckon her with its siren song, tempting her to submit to its mighty roar. On the one hand, she felt depleted and exhausted from the pain—the heartache from longing for a partner, a family, loneliness, and the constant struggle to keep her head above water in all failing aspects of her life. However, a beseeching voice surfaced, resonating—a plea for hope.

Vanessa closed her eyes, taking a deep breath as she tried to steady her racing heart. Would she feel anything at all when she jumped? Would it be a sudden, sharp pain, or would it be quick and almost painless? She couldn't help but think of her family, friends, and the people she would leave behind. Would they understand? Would they forgive her?

The sound of footsteps approached from behind, and Vanessa tensed her shoulders, her body clenching the iron rails as she prepared to defend herself against whatever might happen next. It was a man. Burly and broad-shouldered, his dark hair parted in zig-zags by the wind. He halted a few feet from her and rested his head against the railing, his gaze fixed on the rushing water below.

"Contemplating?" He asked without looking at her. "Gonna give it all up? Let the water whisk you away to a new life?" Vanessa's heart accelerated, glimpsing at the man. This skeptic sees right through her. She hesitated, uncertain of how to respond. His observations struck too close to home, echoing the thoughts swirling in her mind for weeks. She felt a lump form in her throat as she choked down his question.

"You've been here before?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. Finally, the man turned to face her, his expression attentive. Vanessa felt a familiar sense of belonging to this outsider as if he had grasped the turmoil within her without any explanation.

He stroked his coarse beard. "The way you're rooted, the way you're retaining yourself... yah, I feel your pain." He paused. A deep breath. "My name's Alex. Been pulled to this bridge the past few months. People come and go all the time, but most of them don't get it. They don't grasp what it's like to be so lost, so desperate for something... anything."

Vanessa swallowed hard, feeling an unexpected synergy surge through her—a carnal connection to this cryptic stranger. "Vanessa, my name," she stuttered. I just want all the pain to stop."

Alex shifted to face her, his steal gray eyes glazed with familiarity. "I know," he said gently. "I've been there. But you know what? I didn't jump. And you know what else? Today, I'm actually starting to feel a little bit better."

"How did you manage to do it?" she asked, barely audible over the river rush. How did you get past it?"

Alex shrugged, his expression distant as he reflected on those dim days. "Honestly, I don't know. It wasn't easy. Some days were worse than others. But I forced myself to get up every morning. Move forward. I tried to find something, anything, that would give me a reason to live."

Vanessa leaned in with interest in what he was saying.

"I started to think about all the people who loved me. My family. Friends. Somehow, that made a difference. It gave me something to fight for. And then there was this girl. She was just like me, you know? Struggling, alone. And I realized that if I could help her, even just a little bit, well, maybe that was my reason for living."

Vanessa swallowed hard, feeling a lump form in her throat. "I'm glad she had someone like you," she managed to say. Vanessa's eyes glistened with tears, touched by the depth of emotion in his words. She recognized that sometimes it only takes one person to make a difference in someone's life. "Thank you for sharing that with me," she said, tracing over a ridge on the steel with her finger.

"And you know, Vanessa... I think you have that in you, too. The strength to keep going and to find your purpose. You just have to let go of whatever is holding you back and reach out to someone. You're not alone in this." His hand shifted on the rail, brushing hers. Vanessa felt a compulsion to lunge. Not off the bridge, but into his arms. That moment made her believe that maybe, just maybe, she could overcome her struggles. If he were by her side.

"I guess there's also another thing that helped enlighten me quite a bit. Made me see things in a different light. See, I have a trusted friend who's a shaman. Met her when I was sitting where you are now. She gave me a bag of mushrooms. Made me feel connected to something bigger. I still have a few. Maybe you'd feel the same if you tried them. Trying something completely new. No pressure. I'll eat them with you. Might help with a little personal exploration in finding the root cause of your suffering."

"Mushrooms?! " Vanessa repeated, surprised. "Magic mushrooms?"

Alex laughed. "Yah, I prefer to call them medicinal mushrooms. I'm not one to partake in the extracurriculars, but this Shaman spoke to my soul at the time. Figured I had nothing to lose. Made me realize there's more to this world once you scratch the surface."

She analyzed his face, searching for any signs of deception. But she only saw sincerity, a deep understanding of her pain, and a desire to help. Vanessa took a shaky breath and nodded. "Okay, I'll try it."

Alex pulled the twisted bag of dried mushrooms from his coat pocket. "Sounds good! Let's find a place to chill and take them." He reached out his hand, and she graciously slid hers into it—like a glove, she thought. Then he gently raised her off the ledge and stood her on the ground next to his large body. Her knees weakened from the lack of blood flow, and her pulse raced with a mixture of excitement and anticipation.

They strolled along the river, never letting her hand go, and guided her into a clearing in a wooded area. The air felt thick with conjuring. The dappled sunlight filtering through the canopy created a mesmerizing dance of shadows on the forest floor.

They sat beside a babbling stream that jutted from the river and eagerly ingested the mushrooms. Vanessa leaned against a moss-covered tree and shut her eyes, eager for the effects to kick in.

About twenty minutes later, Vanessa opened her eyes. The beauty of the forest mesmerized her. She blinks a few times. Everything surrounding her was crystal clear. Birds sang a timeless melody from the branches. Ants marched in structured lines, and butterflies fluttered dust-speckled wings. Oxygenated air fills her lungs. A tiny spark of hope flickered to life within her at that moment. She felt a sense of peace and calm over her as if the forest had welcomed her into its enchanting world. Vanessa took a deep breath, savoring the clarity and connection with nature.

The colors began to intensify, becoming more vibrant and alive. The greens of the leaves seemed to shimmer and pulsate with energy, as if the grove itself were breathing.

The woods took on a new dimension, as if they could communicate using only an intimate language they could understand. The trees whispered ancient wisdom, their branches reaching out like gnarled fingers, inviting them deeper into their realm. The moss-covered rocks beneath their feet felt like cushions of velvet, each step sending ripples of pleasure through Vanessa's body.

With his eyes still closed, Alex asked Vanessa what she saw. She faced him and said, "Beauty. Life in its purest form." She dragged her words, absorbing the deep connection to the essence of existence within her. Alex opened his eyes and saw tears glistening in Vanessa's eyes, and he felt a sense of reverence at her profound words. At that moment, they both shared a deep understanding of the beauty and interconnectedness of all living things. And each other.

They remained silent, basking in the moment's magnificence, grateful for their deep connection with the natural world. "This is where we belong," Vanessa said, "in harmony with nature and each other."

With a sincere smile, Alex hinted at a deeper understanding. "This is just the start of an incredible journey. I'm looking forward to exploring it with you."

The boundaries between reality and the forest blurred as they continued their fungus-induced voyage. Vanessa felt an in-depth connection to every living thing around her. She could feel the heartbeat of the earth, a rhythmic drumming that pulsed in harmony with her own.

Shapes and patterns emerged from the foliage as if the forest were revealing its clandestine secrets. The trees manifested into towering guardians, their branches intertwining to form intricate lattices stretching infinitely into the sky. The sunlight filtered through the apertures, casting ethereal patterns on the forest floor.

Time lost all meaning as they lost themselves in a kaleidoscope of sensations. She felt a profound sense of unity with nature and Alex, as if she were a part of something much more significant than herself, just like Alex had mentioned. The forest became a sanctuary, a place where the boundaries of the mind dissolved, and her soul was set free.

They sat in silence, lost in thought, soaking up the moment, staring into each other's eyes—their souls.

Vanessa felt a change within her, a profound sense of gratitude and wonder at the possibilities.

The forest opened its doors to her, revealing a world of beauty and interconnectedness she had never imagined. For the first time in a long time, she believed in the prospects ahead, having an inkling that everything would be okay.

They hesitated to leave. Gazing at Alex, she realized that she no longer feared the future.

"It was you." He said, pulling her close enough to feel the synchronicity of their hearts pounding in their chests.

"Me? What do you mean?"

"You are the girl I saw. This afternoon. The one in my position. Struggling, alone. That's when I realized that if I could help her, You, even just a little bit, that would be my reason for living."

Vanessa couldn't hold back tears. "You were talking about me that whole time?"

"I think we may have saved each other. You are the missing link I've been searching for." Vanessa felt a wave of emotion wash over her as she realized the intensity of their connection.

"Alex, I feel the same way. You're the voice that wouldn't let me leave—the hope, the promise. You are the one. Filling the void." Alex took Vanessa's hand, a sense of assurance washing over them as they silently shared a knowing look. They felt their bond was as strong as the rusted steel arc they met on. Both of their lives dangling from the turbulent waters. The connection between them was serendipitous—a force indestructible that would undoubtedly overcome the odds and obstacles that came their way. They were ready to face the world together, with the full acceptance that their love would keep them anchored and hopeful."