The Colorful Mask

I watch as they cheer. The applause ringing throughout the room defended my ears. I smile at them as sincerely as I can. I watch them blow kisses I don’t desire to blow back. A void in my heart makes me wish I could leave. Where did it go the love for this stage? Why have I fallen victim to this sea of lust? Give me my name instead of this blind fame.

She walked off the

stage. Her manager handed her a bottle of water.

She drank it down slowly

as her manager raved with some of the staff. The coolness of the water was

needed. It helped her mind clear. Slowly washing away the frustration she felt.

 She nearly finished her water before she was finally addressed again.

“Good job out there again today.” She was told.

She looked up from the bottle

and put on a brave face.

“Yeah I rocked it!” She

made herself beam.

“You sure did. Now we

have to make sure you are ready for what is next. You have two more gigs coming

up.”

These words came to her in a heavy blow.

“Yeah…” she said smally.

“Don’t worry if you

keep up this level of performance you are sure to keep shining.” Her manager

beamed.

“…”

“Kay?”

She was distracted by her anxiety. She looked up and putt on excitement.

“Oh yeah. I understand.

I’m just a bit tired.” She answered shortly.

“Alright well, how about we celebrate with barbeque.” Her manager said in an encouraging voice.

“Alright, thanks mom.”

She said with a sigh.

As they drove her mom

yakked on her phone about gigs. Every time she hung up, she dialed another

number. It was vexing. “Talk to me” Kay thought. She sped through a light so

distracted by the phone. Kay felt it would serve them right if they crashed.

They arrived shortly

after her mom hung up again.

“We’re here! Now let’s

celebrate!” Her mom beamed.

“This place looks

expensive…” Kay said wearily.

“Don’t worry your gig

paid well.” Her mom reassured her.

As they got to their

seats people stopped them a lot and asked for pictures. Her mom eagerly let

them take a few. She placed the most colorful smile on as she stood with them

one by one.

“Sorry guys but can you

take this outside?” A waiter said as he approached them.

“Sorry guys! This will

have to do it!” Kay then beamed.

After the commotion

ended, she and her mom took their seats. She was waited on immediately by the

same waiter. Her mom eagerly piled up on her order. She asked many questions

about all the expensive foods. By the time she finished, Kay who had zoned out

noticed the waiter leaving.

“Wait my order-“ Kay

said a bit taken aback

“Don’t worry, hun. I

ordered for you too.” Her mom reassured.

Kay sighed.

“Kay, is that okay?”

She put on a colorful

smile.

“Yeah sure!”

The food arrived after

some time. It smelled delicious. Her mom immediately began to divvy it out. She

immediately noticed the portions were off.

I knew it… She thought. She not only got her favorites; she’s eating the most.

She formed up as much

energy as she could and put on a face of fun.

“Well let’s dig in!”

They ate in silence.

She felt the food was what she needed. It was not long after the meal started

that her mom’s phone began to ring. But to Kay’s surprise she didn’t pick

it up. Her stomach lurched at this. Her mom was so selfish at times. If only

she would not pick up the phone when Kay wanted to talk. She didn't want to

feel this way. Afterall she was her mom.

As her face fell, her

mom looked up. She put on a smile before eating into a rib.

“Is everything okay

here?” The waiter said as he returned.

“Yes. However, I would

like a to-go plate.”

Kay’s heart panged. She

was disappointed her mom was keeping this short after all.

Her mom asked for a check as well.

She immediately began texting afterwards.

Kay didn’t like that she had to tip with her own cash as well as having to use the cash her mom was using. Every bit of those funds was hers and she knew it. Her mom always talked about responsibility but never let her practice beyond her selfish reasons. When does a 16-year-old get her freedom?

They drove down the

road too shortly after leaving. It didn’t look like they were going home.

“Where are we going?”

Kay asked.

“To talk to about

another gig.”

“Wait another!?”

“That’s not a problem.”

Her mom said shortly.

“You’re right it’s

not.” She said as she made a smile form.

It took hours for the

meeting to end but as she left, her mom signed a deal for some gigs at parties.

She couldn’t stand it. Where was her freedom? When will she get a say?

Tiredness began to sink into her.

The next few days were

hectic. She wanted to rest so bad, but her mom made her prepare so much, it was

hell.

The day of the next gig

hit so fast that she thought she would die.

As she waited backstage,

she nearly cried at her exhaustion. At least her mom could try to understand.

She was jolted from her thoughts as she heard her introduction. She ran onto

the stage but as she did a photographer flashed a light directly into her eyes.

She got so disoriented by this that she stumbled over a chord on stage before

she knew it. She landed with such a thud as the mic hit her on the head. A

screech filled the room viscously as the mic blared.

Her mom rushed on stage

as Kay clenched her leg.

“What on earth!?” Mom

said angrily.

“My leg!” She cried.

She cringed in pain but

what scared her more than the pain in her leg was the crowd. Their stares

crushed her. She fell back as she wanted to disappear. In her despair, she

listened as the crowd was told the show was over. The words echoed in her mind

mercilessly. Her mask fell and she began to cry.