My 3rd Wife

I wasn’t having much luck in the staying married to death do us part oath. After two failed marriages and belonging to online dating sites such as Zook, Elite, eHarmony, Silver Singles, Christian Mingles, Match, OurTime, Blackpeoplemeet, Findmyflings, Jdate, Be Naughty, Hinge, Ok Cupid, AdultFriendFinder, Bumble, Coffee Meets Bagel, Chappy, Plenty of Fish, 99 Flavors, Cams.Com, Happn, Anomo, Tinder, Clover and The league. Just to name a few online dating sites I have signed up with and not to mention the international online dating sites such as Ukraine Bride Agency, Dream Single, Generation Love, Foreign Girlfriend, eLoveDates, Dates Abroad, International Single Girls, and Angel Return.

I’ve spent a lot of money signing up on those scamming dating sites over the years. But there’s one thing I will never ever do is to send them any money. No matter what horror story they’ve tried to give me.

One time I got an email from an Nigerian African lady I was corresponding with. She stated that she and her sister were being held in bondage and needed 1,000 US dollars or 360,000 Nigerian Naira. I asked her to send me an address so that I could wire the money immediately. I said that I couldn’t have my future wife in sister and law having to worry about anything. Three days later she emailed me a real name and real address. I contacted a professional fraud examiner. 3 days later after that I got an email from who I thought was Mary threatening to “behead” me if I continued my pursuit to expose them.

I don’t believe that I’m a bad looking older gentleman. I keep fit and I never have to worry about money. 9 years ago I hit the Power ball lottery for 212 million dollars. No one knows it but me.  The funny thing about winning the lottery is, that it takes a long time to actually believe you even won. Even after you receive the onetime payment check I decided to take. What I experienced was something called anxiety. Right after watching all 6 of my numbers on the ticket being called out. I suddenly felt excessive worry, feeling agitated, restlessness, fatigue, difficulty concentrating, irritability, tense muscles, trouble falling and staying asleep. I must have checked to see if the windows and doors were locked 80 times after getting that check. Now I had ODC (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).

You would think that after never having to work or even think again. I would be on top of the world instead of seeing a shrink in which I couldn’t even be totally honest with why I knew why I was suffering from Post Dramatic Winning the Lottery Stress Syndrome. (PDWLSS) I didn’t trust anyone.

What kept coming to my fragile mind time after time is when I watched that lottery movie the story of Abraham Shakespeare it being a really tragic epic real life tale. At the age of 40, the Florida man won the $30 million jackpot. After he won, he couldn't say no to those who asked for money, even letting downtrodden strangers live in his home. That trust could have been his downfall. After Dorice Donegan "Dee-Dee" Moore "befriended" Abraham, he went missing. He was eventually found buried in a concrete slab at the home of Moore's boyfriend, and she was convicted of his murder.

I financially took care of my 2 ex wives and 3 children anonymously. Most people don’t care where the money comes from. I didn’t buy anything lavish. In fact I pretended to have lost my mind. Especially quitting my job as a stockbroker. I went so far as to pretend to go homeless for a while living on the streets by day. Eating at all the soup kitchens and at night staying at the condo I purchased for 2.6 million dollars.

You know what I found out that was truly sad. None of the 5 people I gave a million tax free dollars to but my daughter never offered me one red cent or a plugged nickel. According to The Phrase Finder, a plugged coin is one that has had part of it removed and then filled with a lower quality metal. Because nickels are already not worth much, a plugged nickel is completely worthless. The phrase "not worth a plugged nickel" comes from the illegal practice of removing some of the metals from coins and replacing them with cheaper materials. Plugged coins have been tampered with and are therefore no longer legal tender, rendering them completely worthless. The phrase "not worth a plugged nickel" started in the 1880s. Although any coin can be plugged, the nickel is referred to most commonly in the expression.

I Jetsitted around the world until I got bored out of my mind. Most places you visit only show you the luxurious side of their country or famous world city. The world to me is a cesspool.

My final destination is a place called Tuvalu (formerly known as the Ellice Islands), is a country in Polynesia, located in the Pacific Ocean, situated in Oceania and about midway between Hawaii and Australia. The island country lies east-northeast of the Santa Cruz Islands (which belong to the Solomon Islands), southeast of Nauru, south of Kiribati, west of Tokelau, northwest of Samoa and Wallis and Futuna, and north of Fiji.

I felt that I had purchased H.G. Wells time machine on Amazon Prime and went back in time. Tuvalu is among the safest and most remote places in the world. It is the 3rd populated country on earth and the 4th smallest. There are only a few places distant from the world's strife than Tuvalu. The Tuvaluan language and English are the national languages of Tuvalu. The cuisine of Tuvalu is based on the staple of coconut and the many species of fish found in the ocean and lagoons of the atolls. Desserts made on the islands include coconut and coconut milk, instead of animal milk. The traditional foods eaten in Tuvalu are pulka, taro, bananas, breadfruit and coconut. 

Approaching the island by airplane after admirably seeing miles of ocean. I seen a dazzling smear of turquoise and green scenery that suddenly appeared, ringed with coral and studded with tiny, palm-topped islets, sitting vulnerably in the surrounding waters.

Tuvalu’s main island is so startlingly narrow that as the plane neared the airstrip it seems as if it was about to tip into the ocean.

I had been in Tuvalu for over 5 weeks and if ever a place that God intended for me to dwell in, this was the place. The weather, the food, the entertainment, the peace of mind, the sunset, the moon light, the flowers, the Pacific Ocean and most of all the single Polynesians women. On day 36 I met one of those single Polynesian beauties while visiting Tuvalu Philatelic Bureau. The Tuvalu Philatelic Bureau sells all new stamp issues and first day covers at face value. The staff at the bureau offer a very efficient and friendly service, despite the relative isolation of Tuvalu. She was checking out stamps with a 10 inch magnifier. She was Polynesian with a snake tattoo from the top of her bare right shoulder to just below the short skirt on the front left side of her tanned thigh. Her name was Shana. It was love at first sight. 2 months later she became wife number 3.