Tent Dreams

By the time Chip reached the tent the sun was just setting turning the bay into a blaze of yellow and orange. Inside he slipped off his boots, rolled the last of his stash and inhaling deeply settled back to wait for Abby. After a very long day hustling hand-outs, which netted a paltry $13.45, then several hours twirling a "Pizza Now" sign netting another $24.00 he was ready to kick back. On top of that today was New Years Eve. Abby would be in soon; he snuffed out the joint, saving her half. He had a treat for both of them to ring-in the New Year. He closed his eyes for a moment and dozed off thinking about the past year, finally getting a tent, meeting Abby, finding something in her he had not found ever before; he dozed off, enjoying the buzz.

He awoke to the sound of the tent door zipper; Abby. "Hey sweetheart". She flopped down on the old Persian carpet next to him looking tired and worn. He had tried to guess her age many times, but she would never tell him saying things like "Ageless" or just grinning his question away. He lit the joint and passed it to her; inhaling she closed her eyes. Chip lit the small oil lamp that gave some light and less heat, but they liked the softness of it's glow. Looking at Abby, her eyes closed, breathing softly, he thought how good looking she still was in spite of life on the streets. He saw that she must have been a real beauty in her younger days; the street was taking it's toll; aging her beyond her years. They lay wrapped into each other for warmth and the closeness of each other dozing in the flickering light.

They awoke to the sound of someone shouting obscenities in a loud, steady stream. Chip stuck his head out. The crazy woman three tents down was at it again. Shouting and gesturing to someone or something only she could see. He ducked back inside; "It's ok, just Mildred again. I wish she could get help. Poor thing. What is going to happen to her?" Abby was busy building sandwiches; layering precious cuts of lunch meat and cheese on top of thick slices of sourdough bread fresh from the bakery. Chip produced two beers he had stashed; dinner was simple, but enough to fill the gut and warm the spirit. They sat crossed legged eating and looking at the oil lamp flickering, feeling a warmth of togetherness, perhaps even of family; something neither one had felt in recent memory; here was family, here in this 10' dome tent pitched just off the concrete in a stretch of green. One tent among hundreds in this park; one among perhaps thousands in this city; something not seen since the Great Depression, but here it is and here we are. They knew they had no choice but to get out, escape somehow from this hell hole. Looking at Abby, Chip felt the stirring of emotions not felt since he could remember; a closeness to this women with whom he now shared his whole life and she sharing hers with him; like a painting, colors mixing; like music flooding the soul; like the sunset glow over the bay; mixing, sharing; creating a new whole. A rhapsody of being.

"Happy New Year, honey"! Chip opened his hand revealing the small bag of brown powder; his "surprise" for Abby, for both of them. Abby smiled, "Sweet". They shot up; Chip doing Abby, then himself. The oil lamp filled the tent with warm soft light; they laid back snuggling into the sleeping bag; holding each other tight against the chill night winds. Chip pulled Abby closer, "Good stuff"! They drew soft breath, eyes closed, warming each other and fell gently into their dreams. Then, almost together, in unison they whispered those most sought after words all lovers long to hear, "I love you".

The notice appeared on the back page of the local newspaper: "Couple found dead in Tent City. Coroner's report reads " Cause of death: Overdose". Police are not releasing names until next of kin are found and notified". There it was; just another anonymous drug overdose; happens all the time in the tents. The big thing for me is that I knew Chip and Abby, good people, good neighbors and friends. They spoke often about some day getting out, "getting free". Guess they finally made it.

Many things in Life seem absolute, like Birth and Death. For mere mortals, which we are, we mythologize and enshrine these concepts as immutable; they just are and they are absolute. We're taught that. I personally, like everyone, occasionally indulge myself with these high thoughts, but being the mortals that we are we easily lose ourselves in shrouded clouds of the endless unknowable. Some turn to religion or gambling; some bury themselves in work. Me, I turn to weed and the sunlit sky at dusk, when the bay turns into glowing reds and oranges and the high clouds blaze magic and mystery through their light, and I also like a good dream.

So, back to Chip and Abby. The coroner had to pry them apart; regulations, it seems, but a shame, somehow; something immoral about pulling lovers apart; dead or alive.

They never did locate any next of kin; at least any that came forward; burial is a big expense these days; times are hard and you never know just how far you are from a tent and tent dreams lost in some godforsaken stretch of concrete. Me. I'm content to watch the sun set and the sun rise and sit overlooking the bay, light skipping off waves; a fat spliff in hand and drifting into my own dreams. I've never been big on News Years resolutions; tried it a few times; never worked out for one reason or another. For me New Years resolutions are just worthless dreams; not that I don't believe dreams can come true; just they never seem to for me. I don't waste my time on this "New Year's Resolution" crap. But, who am I to say? Sitting here I see some hint of hope for the world in the glittering light off the waves and in the high clouds filled with sunlight; perhaps, just maybe, if you feel like making life changing resolutions; New Years Eve is as good a time as any.