Passageway of Truth

The ride back home after years, the smell of a familiar place that holds memories of your childhood and the sense of belonging that welcomes you proffers a warm feeling that can never be felt anywhere else except the hometown you grew up in. It’s been over four years since Sachi left her house.

Ishaan, Sachi’s four-year-old, was sleeping in the backseat though he would probably be jumping in excitement had he known they were going somewhere new. As they neared the outskirts of Kerala, sadness sank Sachi’s heart. The place did not just house her sweet childhood memories but also some of the worst that made her move out. 

An aged lady came running out of the house towards the car as it pulled up on the front porch. Her face lit up brightly upon the sight of Sachi and even more when she saw Ishaan get up from his sleep, clueless and tired from the long ride. She was Shanti, the house helper and more than that for Sachi’s family for years; someone Sachi grew up with. Shanti hugged them tight enough for the years they had spent apart to vanish. She gestured to them to come in, still finding words to express her happiness. 

Sachi stepped in after much thought. As much as she tried to dodge all thoughts of what happened before she left, they kept coming back like a boomerang. If only erasing memories were easy, happiness would not have been a distant relative for many of us. 

“Sister (Sachi’s mother) will only be here when the travel ban in the UK is over Sachi,” Shanti said. 

Though Sachi left after arguing with her mother, she missed her right now. It is never easy to let go of someone you loved dearly, especially if it’s your mother. It was a tiring journey and so, she retired for the night immediately.

At ten in the morning, Sachi woke up to a sense of emptiness in her stomach. Shanti was in the kitchen. “Is breakfast ready?” she asked. 

“Yes. Also, the Covid-19 situation is escalating, Sachi. You know, we don’t have neighbours close to us to run to for help and the stores are far away. I’ll go to the town in the afternoon to get supplies for the next week.” said Shanti.

Indeed, what brought Sachi back was also the same Covid-19. It was unsafe for Ishaan back in Mumbai and her restaurant had to be closed due to the virus. She really did not have to struggle alone with her child for the affluent background she has but fate had it that she had to leave everything behind, including her mother, and start a life on her own. The uncertainty of life dawned on her with the pandemic situation. Her mother did not deserve the separation and Sachi realised, forgiveness is the best gift she could give herself too. 

In the evening, it was raining heavily. Ishaan had settled in the artificial waterfall in their backyard. After drying him and tucking him tightly on her hips, she brought him on a house tour. They went to the playroom first. She thought she’ll just show him how it looks as it would be dirty. It has been years since they’ve used that room. However, it was clean and neat. 

“Ma,” requested Ishaan as he jumped down and entertained himself there. 

Knowing that he’s not going to follow her at least for the next hour, Sachi took a walk down the hallway. She paused in front of the last room, ran her hands over the knob and stopped. The beautiful moments she had spent with her husband were all locked behind that door. Glancing back at the mirror on the wall opposite, she recalled those times. 

“You look beautiful today,” he said, hugging her from the back that caused her eyeliner to take a detour from the straight line. She turned around, angry. 

“Hug me as tightly as you want now”-she hugged me tighter for a moment before releasing herself from his grip- “because...you won’t be able to wrap your hands fully around me in a few more months”. It took him a moment to realise what she meant. Overjoyed with the enlightenment, he reached for her. She had run off by then. 

Though her mother could not wait to have her grandchild, she was still not 100% in approval of this marriage. For some reason, she never trusted Krish and made them stay with her. Understanding the attachment of a single mother who was abandoned by her husband with a 4-year-old child, Krish agreed to stay with them. He still continued with his business and ran his family with his earnings despite the lack of need to. Krish was the sweetest man Sachi could have had. They had met in college, fallen in love and got married right away. 

In the eighth month of her pregnancy, Sachi was waiting for her mother to pick her up after her weekly prenatal yoga session. That night, she felt the air of the night charged with some unusual vibe. It made her worry but about nothing in particular at all. It was weird because she usually felt high after yoga. The streets seemed darker than usual. The no moon day intensified her uneasiness. Maybe it was because she was closer to delivery. 

The moment she reached home, she called out for someone to make her feel better. But the house was cold and empty. Mother was in town. There was still time for Krish to return from office. Shanti had gone to visit her father. In a few hours, her mother and Shanti returned. Past ten, Krish still hadn’t returned. He did not pick up her calls. She did not have dinner. He did not respond to her messages. She did not sleep. She waited. And waited. And is still waiting after four years. 

There was never a message from him. That, made it hard for her to believe that he was gone. Sachi was sure. The Krish she knew would never ever leave her even if she wanted to. She cried. She could not handle this separation without a proper reason. Hope or be angry; she could not decide. 

Three weeks went by and one day, Sachi was sitting on the front porch. Staring at the gate, she hoped it would swing open and Krish would run towards her. Her mother was tired and could not look at her daughter being this lifeless. 

 “Listen,” she started. “I know he was an important man. But you gotta accept this. He is not going to come back. Your child is gonna be out any time soon. You should not be worrying about anything now. Please move on for the kid.” she said. 

“How could you say that he won’t return? Did you try searching for him? Please mom. Could you please search for him. I’m sure he did not leave us once and for all.” she begged. 

“He took all his belongings with him. He wanted to leave you. Would someone who deliberately left his family come back if we find and called him back? I have seen this before. He is like your dad. He too, left and never returned. Not like you don’t know..” 

Sachi glanced up at her mother. “What?” 

“Trust me, I knew he was not that good. I had always known. I think you are better without him. He never loved you. That’s why he left before you gave birth. Let go of him.”

Sachi sat looking at her mother. Did she just hear her say that? Sachi was sensitive when it came to her relationship. No one could just undermine it just like that. She knew Krish. She trusted him, unlike her mother. 

No one understands me, she thought. She is just concerned about my baby. What matters is not just my baby but my mental health too. I’d rather live without them than constantly hear her undermining my relationship just like that. 

In reality, she could not bear to hear the truth being spat at her just like that. The image she had of Krish, she wanted it to remain. She wanted to live in hope rather than in despair. She moved out of the house, nine months pregnant. Years passed. Sachi never felt like going back. She tried her best to locate Krish but with a child, somehow, she gave up. The light of hope in her though, never doused. She started a restaurant that was Krish’s dream for many years. Then came Covid-19 and knocked down the business. Made life difficult for her. Yet, one good thing, it made her long for her mother’s company. 

“Mom! Come here!” shouted Ishaan, dragging Sachi back to reality. Hoping he did not get injured or anything, Sachi ran to the playroom, her heart pumping, she opened the door. He was safe, at least he looked like he did. Just that he was lying down, facing up, in an awkward position between a life-size cupboard and a wooden horse. His right leg was as on top of the horse and his hands were behind his head. He clearly couldn’t help himself up. Controlling her laughter, Sachi stretched her arms to lift him up. Right when she moved him, she noticed the wood flooring pattern a bit different under the cupboard. 

“Oooh it’s 7p.m. Time for cartoons?” she asked Ishaan. He had completely forgotten about the television in this house of hers and ran towards the living room as soon as she mentioned it. 

Sachi moved the cupboard inch by inch. It was made out of solid wood and was really heavy. What laid beneath was a square area that did not fit the pattern of the rest of the floor and had a handle. She was not that curious about it. She never knew it existed in her house, so why not open it to see, was all that she thought. There was no lock or anything to the handle which all the more made it look very harmless. She pushed it open. Initially, it did not budge but after using her full strength, the opening gave way. It was pitch dark inside. 

She reached her hand inside to feel what was there. After much digging around in the air, she touched a dirty, dust-covered wall-like surface. Grabbing a torch-light from the shelf, she saw that it was a stair that led somewhere down. Now, she was scared. But she did not sense danger. Not even a single second of thought. She went down as though it was pulling her towards it. 

The passageway smelled strange. She could not describe it but the stench was strong. She listened. The electrical buzzing of wasps and mosquitoes surrounded her. It was disturbingly cold. Soon, her feet touched the floor. Still, there was no curiosity driving this quest. She felt her way through the place. Wooden bricks. So, there were walls. Right then, her toe hit something on the floor, sending vibrations down her. The object felt like leather. She shone the torchlight on it. It was a bag. A very familiar one indeed. When it made sense, she dropped herself. It was Krish’s. Fear, worry and puzzled all at once churned her heart. 

After rummaging it, she found his diary between some clothes, all moist and filled with fungus. There was no time to gross-out. One page was folded. She went straight to it. 

“Dear Sachi, 

I hope you find this someday. Oh man I really wish you do.  If you ever find this, DO NOT EVER TELL YOUR MOM ABOUT THIS. Read it fully first. 

Yesterday, when you were at the yoga class, I came back home to get a file I placed in the playroom. And I found this passageway, went down and found two rotting bodies. I was mortified. I called up your mom before going to the police. She came home and began convincing me to just leave it there. I insisted on going to the police. Then, the truth came out. She is not your mother. The two bodies were that of your parents. Your dad did not run away. I still have no clue who this woman is and why she is in your life. Beware, please. She knocked me out after telling me all this. I was here when I woke up with my things. The bodies are missing. She probably buried them and thinks I’m dead too. I have no clue what story she is going to cook about me to you but please don’t hate me. She had always hated me so there’s no way she is gonna do good to you, please be careful. Just go straight to the police. 

I don’t think I’ll survive. I’m getting breathless. As much as I don’t want to give up, I don’t have a choice. Is our kid doing well? Is it a guy or a girl? I’ll never know right. Take care Sachi. I really love you.”

Sachi cried out in silence after reading it. Devastated at his loss. Shocked that her mother is not her mother and had killed Krish and her parents. Never would she have imagined this. The burden of the information she had acquired weighed her down. It answered all her previous questions only to open up more that questioned her life. She ran upstairs with the dairy, pushed the cupboard back to its original spot. As she ran up to the hall, she found Shanti already back home from the town. She did not know what step to take next. 

In an attempt to be normal, Sachi sat in front of the television, turned on the TV. 

“India will be entering a complete lockdown, from midnight today for 21 days,” came the breaking news, leaving Sachi helpless. The time was 11 pm. There would be no transports. Where could she run off to? But could she stay in this house after knowing this much already? She walked over to the kitchen where Shanti was cleaning up. 

“Shaanti ma,” her words were really soft. 

“Thank god, we have stocked up. It would’ve been so troublesome to go town to get groceries. This is such a sudden decision though, don’t you think?”

“Haha, yes,” nervousness was written all over her face. “Ma, do you remember the first time you came here? How long has it been? You never felt like having a family of your own?”. Sachi prayed Shanti doesn’t smell anything. 

“Why do you ask?”

“Just curious. I don’t think anyone can be as selfless as you. But why?” 

“Nothing much Sachi dear. My mother used to work for your dad’s family. She gave birth to me here. She died here. I decided to continue what she was doing as I had no education. It’s sad though, I never met your father.” 

“You haven’t? My mother?” biting her tongue immediately realising the slip she made. She corrected herself, “I mean how did you meet my mother then?”

“Oh, after your grandparents died, your dad went to the UK. He phoned me on the day he was coming back and called me here. I came after a week. Your mother was here with you, crying about her husband. Just like Krish, he had left you. Who knows what happened? Now that I think about it, don’t you think there’s some similarity between his and Krish’s disappearance?” 

Sachi nodded.

“Sometimes I wonder if it's the house. Maybe it’s cursed. Do you think we should call someone spiritual soon?” asked Shanti innocently. 

Sachi placed the puzzle pieces together. Somewhere in the one week Shanti was not here, her current mother has killed her parents, staged the drama that her husband left her and took over her mother’s position. When Krish found out about it, she killed him too. Why? Who was she? There was a lot of research to do. But Sachi could not just frame her as a villain in her life. The days she spent singly bringing up Sachi safely was something she couldn’t overlook. 

Would all these justify the fact she killed three of her relations or anyone for the matter of fact? She needed a lot of time to think. Even if she did go to the police, she had to wait until her mother was back in the country. But first, she needed time to digest the fact that Krish no longer exists. The rest, she had 21 days to think about. Beyond the gratitude she has for her mother, she decided not to let go of that woman without knowing why she entered her life. 

The passageway mystery was solved. It did open up more though. That, Sachi will take care of in a sequel.