New Life

It has been four months since I arrived in this country. Four months seem to be a short period of time, not very transcendental, but they could become an eternity when you are waiting for something. Every day of the last four months, my head has gotten tired of counting the seconds, the minutes, the hours, to be closer to today, august 20^th.

At first, I did not know how much time I had to wait; I was just hoping that it would not be too long. The only assurance I had, was that waiting was unavoidable, and that the amount of time was unpredictable. Actually, I was lucky that it ended up just being four months; the inconvenient was that the first two months I just waited impatiently. However, after the second month had passed, I received the information of the exact date, and I do not know what is better, being at the anticipation of something to happen or having in your hands the advice of when it is going to happen, and just count the days until reaching it. 

As I mentioned, four months are short time; relatively; for instance, I am already getting used to my new life, even though it is very different from before, when I was not an immigrant. I came here and soon found a small place to live and a job as a waitress, and before I noticed, I had a routine, a new one, but still routine: I wake up, have some breakfast, dedicate two hours to my studies (I am getting my master’s degree online), go to the restaurant and work for ten or eleven hours ( I literary cannot complain), and go home to eat some cereal while watching a TV show and then going to bed, to repeat the same activities the next day and the next… and the next.  

Nevertheless, it is a long time also, in the sense of missing my country, my home town, and everything I left to seek a “better life”: I left behind my family, my friends, my cat, and him, the boyfriend which whom I had a relationship for seven years, Daniel.

I miss him the most, because my family is always going to be my family, and my friends are always going to be there for me, and will always keep in touch no matter the distance or the passing of time; family and friends will be in my life, and I know I will see them again; but romantic relationships are very different; romantic relationships simply end, and the ones involved become total strangers and get out of each other’s lives, and never get in touch again.  

Anyways, my previous life is in the past, I guess, now I have to look forward for the future, for whatever is ahead of me. This new life, at the moment sucks a little, but that is okay, the first year of being an immigrant is the hardest one they say, so, I must recognize it has not been that bad so far, just having a job I do not like and living from hand to mouth because I cannot apply to jobs in my field of study (Architecture) since my working visa is still being processed.

A visa, that little piece of paper glutted to your passport (depending on the country you are applying for), is one of the most wanted documents in the world. When you get a visa, you are bestowed some sort of new identity, you start to exist in that new country and join that culture as a new citizen. You become a member of society, and become a number, an added number that will pay taxes and is going to be tracked, monitored and watched. The funny part is that the new residence country does not provide you with this document at the moment you put a foot in its land, but later, after analyzing if you are worthy, and that process could take months, or even years. As a consequence, you are lingering there, being a zero, not leaving but not existing there either, and trying to survive, taking any underpaid job in the meantime. Your prior work experience does not matter, your prior studies and knowledge do not matter, you are a zero, and real numbers treat you in that fashion. It is okay though, it is supposed to get better.

When looking for a job in my field, I was asked “do you have a (temporary) visa?” and I would answer awkwardly “no, but it is being processed, I will have it in no time”. The employer’s answer usually went in the same direction: “we will call you in a few months so you would get your visa, or let us know, as soon as you do”. After a few tries, I just lowered my expectations, for now, and realized that I cannot truly compete without that piece of paper.

Regarding the search of a place to live, the situation is less complicated. Some of them require a visa to grant the right to rent, but some others are more comprehensive, and ask for papers immigrants should have, such as passports, studies certificates, criminal records, to name a few. Constantly, procedures as these are heavy processes. They take time, effort and dealing with burocracy, which is the worst part of it. It is fine, immigrants are supposed to follow the rules and adapt.  

Either way, the wait is almost over, because today is august 20^th, so, I am agitated and relaxed, just eager for hours to pass rapidly. These past four months have been lonely, perhaps that is the reason why I keep uttering monologues. I am returning home from work now, and I cannot breathe of excitement. Finally, Daniel took the flight today, august 20^th; he will walk through my door at any minute to be reunited with me, to become an immigrant here with me and start this new life together.  

By the way, I do not know when I would get my visa; now I can start the waiting of it.