Invisible

It was 5 p.m. and the sky was slowly turning to dark blue as the day got close to its end. Chris was at a friend’s house, waiting for someone to finish doing their makeup and changing so he could do his, since his costume wasn’t something special; he was appearing as a ghost, simple. 

As soon as Peter finished changing, he came out of the room and gestured to Chris as he himself was struggling with his mask. Chris jumped out of his seat on the small sofa he had been crumbled in. He went to the room which was chaotic. He put his bag down next to a small mirror that was placed on the floor and looked around. 

Clothing pieces everywhere, one’s pants were on the headboard while another T-shirt was hanging on the closet door. “what a mess.” He chuckled. Besides the mess in the room’s interior, the atmosphere was even worse. Nobody would even notice if a bomb exploded right in front of the house. They were being loud as hell. 

He shook his head, laughing quietly at them. Boys’ gatherings should be loud, if not, then they are not boys! 

He opened his bag, taking out the stuff he borrowed from his sister. He wasn’t completely clueless about makeup stuff, but he wasn’t too informed either. He knew the basics, like the moisturizer creams. And that was all he knew beside some home-made masks his mother and sister made from time to time. 

He unlocked his phone and went through his text messages, pausing on this and that till he found the one which contained the introductions on the makeup products he was going to use. 

After some time, he was busy literally dipping his face and hands in white powder, just to make his already pale face look more pale and in the meantime, he listened to others discussing on where to go. It wasn’t a serious discussion but some of them were insisting on going to a club, which others were strongly declining. 

He took out the white layer of mattress he had brought out of his bag and pulled it on his head, a little struggling to find the hole he had cut on it early that day. After securing the fabric on his head, he went for another round of powder. As he opened the container’s cap, his hand slipped and the powder spread everywhere. 

“Ah… the heck” Chris cursed under his breath and rubbed his eye with the back of his hand. “Can you give me a tissue, please?” He asked one of his friends who was sitting next to him. But he didn’t get a reply, nor any effort to make a move to help him out. 

Chris was taken aback, not that he would say anything or do anything. He just laughed the shock away and took one himself. He was always the backup friend in the group. He wasn’t a favourite one, he was the one that everybody remembered when they were in their dark times, but would leave him when they don’t need comfort. 

He was kind of used to this, he wasn’t really bothered because he loved them all. But this action was just too forward to take in. 

He wiped his face quietly, fixing his looks again. He got up and joined others who were ready in the living room. He looked around, everyone was looking weird. He giggled and stood there listening to conversations that were on the go. 

After a while, everyone was ready, so they left the house one by one, so did Chris. Every time he tried to make a comment on a conversation, his words got lost in others’. It was like nobody cared, and nobody heard him. 

It felt kind of normal at first, because of all the behaviours he used to tolerate. But at this point he was just so taken aback, feeling a bit sad. Actually more than a little bit, but he denied it to himself. 

As they walked to the more crowded area of the town, he felt lonelier. Looking at people, literally everyone had somebody with them, talking to them. But there was Chris, being a popular loner, feeling left behind a big crowd of friends. 

“hey, look at this!” Chris said as he got distracted by the big mummy which was placed in front of a house on the other side of the street. He was completely distracted and lost in his never-ending excitement, that he didn’t see the car racing towards him.

He was too shocked to gasp or give any kind of reactions. 

He closed his eyes, already welcoming of the pain and the accident. But nothing happened, no car horns, no crashing. He listened to the sounds, the car getting further away, nobody even gasped at the scenery. 

Chris slowly opened his eyes, he looked around. He saw his friends that were little by little getting smaller in the view. He saw unfamiliar faces that were looking at him. Some with smiles on their faces, some didn’t have any expressions but were welcoming. 

He was confused, he tried to scream and call someone. But his voice echoed in a place which had no capability of echoing any sound. At the very moment, his attention was drawn towards a kid who was running in his direction. He didn’t move a bit, but surprisingly, the kid ran through him. No crashing, no touch, no feels. It felt like he was a part of the air. 

He looked at his hand, more pale, Almost see-through. He felt a warm yet cold touch on his shoulder. Chris flinched, but maintained calm, looking at the figure whom the touch belonged to. 

“welcome son.” His voice sounded old, and kind; “you joined us today, it’s a blessing.” 

“I joined you…?” Chris asked with hesitation; “in what? I didn’t join anything.” His voice shaking, his body started shivering, too. 

The man held his hand, smiling at Chris. “You are what you wear, this is an old forgotten Halloween tradition.” His words ran through Chris’s head, echoing repeatedly and rapidly. 

He was silent, he was confused, he was scared. He couldn’t think straight. Everything was just so hard to imagine, neither believe it. 

He opened his dry lips, talking in the weakest and lowest voice he could make; “so… am I dead…?” he asked, on the edge of breaking in. 

“oh dear, There’s no death in this time.” The old man spoke; “we just fade away when we’re forgotten.” 

-I was already missing, before the night I left. Just me and my shadow, and all of my regrets. Who am I, when I don’t know myself? Who am I, invisble?