My Life As A Second Lead

My Life As A Second Lead

'Every love story in this world end’s up  giving us a second lead  syndrome'

'The second lead who is always the kind one ends up with broken heart'

They said . I never understood why people were so sensitive to some second lead who doesn’t even exist in real life but I realized I was wrong when I experienced the life of a second lead.

He was my friend my best friend . We used to spend all the time with each other, in school and after school . Our parents had a good relation with each other making us more privelaged to have each other. We were kids at that time , but as time passed by my perspective towards him as a friend started taking a different turn about which he was unaware of.

Yes, I’m a boy and I love him since it’s a him my life as a second lead began to take its charge .

Ryan Wang the only bilingual in our whole grade since the most popular guy among girls . But he already had someone else in his mind his second love ,well when he broke up with his first girlfriend I was so happy that I couldn’t even sleep for day’s , but when he told me about the girl he is interested in I couldn’t sleep for day’s but this time with sorrow .

Courtney the girl he loves . A really shy ,introvert but smart at the same time , a personality that not everyone knows about but Ryan does . She kinda got some hints about Ryan being interested in her , ofcourse she had to find that out since he was so obvious . Out of the blue one day she came to our class me trembling inside not knowing what’s going to happen , as blinked I saw her smiling to Ryan saying  “ I can’t wait for you any longer to confess to me , it’s pissing me off“   those golden words were no more gold when she continued and said “lets just date”. And hence him and her became the main leads of this love story while me being the second lead sobbing for the main lead hero to recognise my love and come to me as a superman which I think is quite impossible to happen in real life scenario .

To be honest I don’t hate Courtney well I do have a jealousy towards her but through her I learned something. Being an introvert she showed the courage to come out to Ryan which I wish was someone else though but still to get reminded , I saw her come to our class doorway almost everytime trying to collect courage to say something but returned everytime as always now I get it why she came constantly . She collected every courage in her and confessed that Ryan himself couldn’t do it . And now I think I should start collecting my courage and tell Ryan the truth that seems a bit hard .

“Just break up.”

“Why!!”

“M-ma-maybe you should concentrate on your studies right now , yyou are 17 and you should get into a good university r-r-right.”

“But aren’t you the one who cheered me up to date Courtney , and now the same you are telling me to just dump her I’m sorry but  not knowing the reason I’m not gonna break up with anyone”

He’s right I was the one who always cheered him to  date her , to ask that girl out and stuff but maybe I did that to get myself out loving him , but I failed doing it maybe for the good because now it’s time for me to come out  .

“It’s b-because I love ....”

“No way you can’t   you can’t love her , you are my best friend how can you do this to me ?!?”

“ Yes I love but not her ............You

I Love U     “

He made a really disgusted expression I was so shocked because I have never seen that side of him .

“I don’t even wanna see your face just get lost “

As I was scared of he too was one of those toxic people who will never understand LGBTQ+ people fighting for their rights , I thought.

Just like a polaroid consisting of my life events I tried to lock it up in  the box of failures . Sobbing in a corner lossing my friend and my first love .

Cursed the authorities as much as I could for not normalizing the LGBTQ+ rights because of which people  still are toxic towards us.

Several days passed and I finally started going back to school (my parents were worried though that’s why decided to go back to school) saw Ryan on my way and me trying to just go on on another way but he ran to me held my arm’s and said “I don’t care “  I was confused he didn’t gave me a chance to say anything and just hugged me for a while , the moment he hugged me my heart was literally racing to its highest point a feeling that I never got in my life like ever , I have imagined me  several times kissing him but never thought that in the reality just being hugged by my love would give the most beautiful moment of my life .

“I’m sorry I couldn’t understand you neither did I supported you as a friend it was my job to do so  I’m reallly sorry “

Even though I was so happy in my own world with him I could see where he was goinbut I was ready to face the reality.

“ I was so depressed that day when you said me to dump Courtney that’s why I behaved so horribly that day “

“well it’s totally fine “ I said

“but I don’t think that I can love you  because I can only see you as a friend I am sure you can understand me “

“you know what let’s just forget everything and just get back to those time we used to be together” I was broken just like those second leads but can’t do anything but to hope the best for the main leads .

Ryan Wang and Courtney lived happily ever after just like the  ending  of every typical love story while the second lead as always left broken giving everyone a second lead syndrome .

But even though I think that every love story should have a happy ending but when it comes to my story I think we should just move on because not every love ends with it’s first love . This world is so big and I am sure that I could be able to find another Ryan who totally understands me and loves me . Let’s just make ourselves the main leads of our own stories.