Wǒ huì fāguāng : I will shine

Taiyang was waiting for someone in a coffee shop. He had been living in New York for the last six years and was a human rights activist. His eyes were fixed at the door, he was jittery and palpably anxious and already had six cups of coffee. There was a news flash on the big screen in the center of the café, the headline in bold letters: "North Korea tests 3 more missiles.”His eyes suddenly looked very deep as if he was hit by a maelstrom. He was not jittery anymore. Time stood still and Taiyang was lost in deep evocation of memories.

In a tenebrous squalid room, on a decript bed ,laid a woman in deep distress.She was hemmed by nurses ,who were trying to allay her pain. “Pusi , pusi,” in a chorus exhorting the woman to push harder. The woman appeared pale and emaciated.She was palpably out of energy but her baby wasn’t out of her womb.The chorus grew louder “deo yeolsimhi,deo yeolsimhi,” She kept grappling and at last she gave birth to a healthy baby boy.The head nurse cut off the umbilical cord and exclaimed “ Namjae Ya." The woman took the new born in her arms , kissed his forehead and sobbingly in an incoherent voice said: “nae namja,"(my son). Albeit she had just given birth , she was fretting about what would happen to this new life, who was born inside a North Korean labour camp.The nurses took away her kid as she fell asleep. The new born was registered as: “ namja agi ibaeg”, which meant baby no 200. His mother wasn’t given a chance name to him. His father had n't even seen him yet. He was sent to a nursey few miles away , where he was raised till he was ready to join his parents in toiling hard for their “supreme leader”.

Growing up the boy hardly had any interactions with his family. From an early age he was being taught about the supreme leader and his "diviness".The "supreme leader" was a "consecrated" figure and his subjects had to devote their lives to fulfil his wishes and complete his mission to make Korea a preponderance force in the world. People who disobeyed the regime were persecuted and ostracised. Even their children were not exonerated. These people had to work till their last breath. Propaganda was ingrained in young children's mind from an early age, so that there were no disruptions in the smooth conduct of the regime. The boy grew up in that camp and was living a miserable life.He was five , when he started picking up stones with his father. Often he would drop these heavy stones on his feet and hurt himself badly .His father with great obloquy would continue on working , with his son crying out loud in pain. His little feet and fingers were bruised and had deep cuts . The morbidity was unpalatable . Abhorrence of humanity was at display ,the ideas of relation, humanity, emotions and intimacy were oblivious to the children who were born there. They were growing up in wretchedness and sordity.A place where a mother was happy to see a stillborn child than bring another life in the abyss. The boy's mother was on the verge of breakdown. She had been grotesquely raped by a prison guard and was pregnant with his child. She was contemplating escape. She was discussing this with her husband ,with the boy sitting beside her.He heard her mother discussing treason as it was taught to him. According to the propaganda ,people who discussed escaping or escaped had to be punished severely and pain would be wreaked on those who helped them or concealed information about such people.His mother had forgotten that albeit she had given him birth she hadn't raised him .She wasn’t given a chance to raise , to love the child . An innocuous assumption that that her child understood his relation with her, would turn out to be fatal for her. The obsequious boy insouciantly told the guards about what he heard . She was hanged the very next day. She screeched but to no succor.She was dragged through the stones ,broken glasses that laid in her path . With blood seeping through her body and tears coming out of her eyes, she exclaimed:"nae adeul salanghae” ( I love you son). Those were her last words. Her husband stood there bawling and in opprobrium. His weakness was smoothering him . The boy was emotionless ,not a single tear came out of his eyes .He was just 8 and his mother was dead because of him but he didn't understand that, he didn’t know what had happened ,what had been taken away from him.

The camp stood near the North korea -China border. An electric barbedwire fence separated the camp from China. Many had tried to escape but were either electrocuted by the wire or shot dead by the guards

The boy was pulling a cart full of bricks and was finding it extremely difficult to pull the cart. Continuing his tenuous journey ,

barefoot ,walking through sediments and glasses heavily panting with every step.The cart got stuck he tried to remove the stone which was scuppering it’s movement but to no avail. Inundated he apoplectically pulled the cart, the wheels skid and cart was unbalanced . The whole cart fell over him, the bricks laid scattered and the boy was badly injured. He was taken to the medical room. He was bandaged ,there were bruises all over his body. He laid there groaning in pain. But in just 15 minutes he made his way back to the ground. Limping he went back to work.The accident had a drastic impact on him. He was anxious, fearful of getting hurt again. He didn't want to work anymore. He realised how alone he was . His father hadn’t been seen since his mother's death, he was all alone as before but now he was living in trepidation. He was in too much pain to continue working but the wretched men around him didn’t care about that. He started making mistakes .His little fingers and arms just didn't have the strength to carry on. He was flogged everyday for being "inefficient", it was just unbearable now. There were cuts all through his body, he wanted to screech in pain but was afraid of being beaten again. His already emaciated figure ,started to look more pale and gaunt. He was being smoothered. Till one day. It was heavily raining . In the inclement weather the guards stood under the sheds warming themselves . While the workers shiveringly worked in the rain. The boy was working near the barbed fence he kept looking at the fence repeatedly, he knew that people escaped from there . That accident had him resentful . He didn’t want to work anymore. There was a loud thunderous lightning , he dropped the cart and started running towards the fence. He knew this was the moment . The guards didn't notice him, it was getting dark and he was too small. He reached pretty close to the fence , when one of them shouted"geumanhae,"(stop you f***er). He didn’t look back. It was too late for them to catch him .He didnt look back .He crossed the fence and as fate would have it ,electricity wire was off .He cut himself again but it didn't hurt this time, he didn't look back ,he crossed that border and kept running.

Inundated by injustice ,wretchedness and the grotesque life he was leading ,the boy who was ingrained with propaganda since his birth became resentful of the depraved institution, which had incarcerated him since birth . A boy who hadn’t made a single decision of his life till that point ended up making the most significant decision of his life. He ran like a fledged bird, there was freedom, there was catharsis ,he was hit by a maelstrom. He didn’t fell anything for years except pain. He saw his mother die in front of him and felt nothing, that's how deep his scars were .His body was bruised but it didn’t hurt any more ,the were no barriers anymore. He was drenched . He was tired. He was nine and had just started breathing .

It was past dusk then he started to slow down.He was out of breath, tired and hungry. Soon he couldnt see anything , he was gasping and then he fell down. An old man heard something and came out of his house to see. He saw a small ,gaunt boy, unconscious , drenched and laid prostrated at his entrance. He picked him up took him inside and took care of him . The old man realised that he was another migrant.The old man didn’t hand over the boy to the authorities fearing that they would send him to an orphanage and he won't be taken care of .The old man had been living alone for a while so he didnt mind having company. The two formed a close, poignant relation. The old man taught the boy about discipline, compassion ,humanity, love and desire. He also gave him a name, "Taiyang". After few years , the old man fell sick. The boy looked after him till his last breath. Before dying his last words to Taiyang were: "ni hui da fang yicai"(promise me you will shine).

He started coughing ,Taiyang went to kitchen to bring water ,by the time he came back,the old man was no more. Taiyang cried all night .He was bearaving, an emotion that the old man instilled in him. Taiyang, 13 ,left that village and somehow reached South Korea .The old man always told him to runaway when he wasn't there anymore. "Wo hui fanguang",said Taiyang before leaving the graveyard.

Taiyang was rehabilitated in South Korea.He attained a degree and became a human rights activist. His work brought him to USA ,where he had been living for last 6 years.

"Taiyang,Taiyang,"shocked as if he woke up from a long dream."oh ,you are here, what took you so long, before Tangmi could answer ,Taiyang took a box of his pocket, he didn't want to wait anymore, so he knelt down on one knee and said: "Will you marry me?"

Tangmi suprised and with tears flowing through her eyes replied: "yes,we will." He got up and kissed her . And then asked obfuscatingly : "we?" Tangmi leaned over him and softly (in his ears)-" I'm pregnant." Taiyang inundated by emotions hugged her tightly.

The End.