Manzanillo Nights

“Que cojones está pasando, Mariko?! Que pasa si ellas regresan?”

“If they come back then I might be able to tell you what the hell is going on. But they’re not coming back. Unfortunately.”

“Los mataste?”

“One of them, yes. But it was kind of his own fault.”

“For attacking you?”

“What? No. For shooting the gas tank of the boat I was hiding in. There was a small explosion as I jumped clear, and then it fell off the lift and onto him.”

“Ay Dios mi, that’s terrible. And the other guy?”

“He ran off when he saw the boat rampage.”

“So you’ll go look for him then? To find out what this was all about?”

“Señor. We need you to come with us.”

 “shit.”

“What’s the problem, officers?”

“The havoc you caused this morning in the shipyard, of course.”

“Oh, is that where all that commotion was coming from? What makes you think I know anything about that?”

“Several witnesses saw you running towards the shipyard just before everything happened, señor. So please, just come with us and answer a few questions.”

“Are you sure it was me? You know eye witnesses can be very unreliable in chaotic situations.”

“Señor…there is no one else in all of Manzanillo wearing army boots, no shirt, and Pink Panther board shorts. Please, don’t make this difficult.”

“Honestly, these were on sale at Sam’s Club, so I think you’re making quite a leap. Roberto has a pair, too. Right, Roberto?”

“Señor…”

“Fine. Let’s go have a chat.”

***********************************

“Señor…Andrews, correct? James Andrews?”

“That’s right.”

“Tell me Señor Andrews, why were those men chasing you this morning?”

“You’re asking me the same question that I wanted to ask them.”

“So, you didn’t know these men?”

“I did not. But if you could round up the second hombre, maybe we could all get some answers…or…maybe you already did round him up. He wouldn’t talk?”

“He’s dead, señor.”

“Did he say anything before you killed him?”

“Señor, the men chasing you are of no consequence. Dos matons de mala vida. Someone hired them to find you. Why?”

“Perhaps, and I’m just thinking out loud here, maybe someone with an understanding of this little town and todos matons de mala vida who live here could, I don’t know, do some investigating. Ask around a bit.”

“Oh we have asked around a bit, señor. My partner has found out all about you.”

“Oh, she has? That doesn’t seem fair. Maybe we should go grab lunch and you tell me a little about yourself?”

“Sergeant James Andrews; born in Lancaster, Ohio; enlisted in the US Army out of high school; awarded 2 Bronze Stars while serving 3 tours in Afghanistan; made Corporal in just 21 months...quite the resume.”

“Okay…”

“Resurrected from the dead in 2017 after succumbing to injuries sustained in an ATV accident only for his ghost to turn up in Manzanillo, Colima. Six. Years. Later.”

“Must be another James Andrews. I’ll just get out of your hair while you go look for that one.” 

“Hey…”

“Excuse me, Officer…….Cutey, I’d like to leave now.”

“It’s Cuahuey. And Officer Moreno and I aren’t finished with you yet.”

“No. He can go. It seems Señor Andrews is only guilty of being clumsy in his escape from an ambush. For now. But I think it would be wise for this James Andrews to leave Manzanillo sooner rather than later. Whoever is after you will try again. I do not want your trouble, or your blood, in my town.”

“Fair enough. But for the record, I am not clumsy, Officer Cuahuey.”

***********************************

“Donde esta la moneda, gringo?” 

“Moneda? Moneda, moneda…the money?”

“The coin, pendejo, where is it?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, man. What coin?”

“I guess you’re no use to me then, and I’ll just have to search your things when you’re dead.”

***********************************

“He should be back by now. Something’s wrong. I told you we should’ve all gone. This gringo already escaped this morning, killing Jorge, and he managed to get out of custody of the policia, too. He’s not some beach bum tourist. We need to use more men to take him out.”

“Vamanos.”

“Aren’t you listening to me? We need to take this guy more seriously. I’m not going near him again until we do.”

“You will do exactly as the Generalissimo says. You don’t have a choice, remember? And even if you did, don’t lose sight of the big picture because one man accidentally blew up some boat racking and escaped. Besides, you already played your part, just like Victor is now playing his. And soon, I will play mine.”

************************************

“Oh good, you’re up. I hope I didn’t wake you. It looked like you could use a nap. Don’t worry, I’ll take the gag out in a minute. We do need to talk after all. I need you to tell me about this coin.”

“Donde estoy…?”

“Oh you don’t remember jumping me in my own room, asking me for a coin, and then threatening to kill me? Shame, because you put up a very mediocre fight before I used your own gun to send you to naptime.”

“It’s coming back a bit. Pink Panther, really?”

“You’ve been gagged for hours, and the first thing you want to talk about is my fashion choices? I’m putting the gag back.”

“No, no, no, I like them. Love Pink Panther. Who doesn’t? I’m just jealous.”

“Shut up. Now talk…shut up about my shorts, but talk about the coin. Why are you looking for it? Why are you so sure I have it?“

“I’d rather talk about your fashion choices.”

“This will be a lot easier if you cooperate. I’m not looking for trouble. I’m really just trying to enjoy the beach, hombre.”

“You may not be looking for trouble, but trouble is here. If you wanted a trouble-free beach vacation, maybe you should have gone to Hawaii. But…oh that’s right. You can’t lay on a beach in Hawaii, can you? You have to go somewhere you can disappear. Because the truth is, trouble is always looking for you. Isn’t that right, gringo?”

“Enough chit chat. Who sent you? Tell me now .”

“You won’t kill me. That’s not your style. But even so, there’s no need to. Everything will be revealed in time.”

“Just because I won’t kill you doesn’t mean you’ll like what comes next.” 

“Fine. You helped a man escape the cartel here. He gave you a coin to keep safe or as a reward. I don’t know which. But now I’ve been asked to deliver that coin to someone else. Give it to me, and I won’t bother you anymore. But I can’t promise trouble won’t come your way again.”

“Well, you’re out of luck, amigo. No one gave me anything. So you’ve got the wrong gringo.”

“I have the right gringo. I’m sure of it. But I do believe you. I don’t think you even know what you have or that you have it. Trust me though, others will come for you. So you need to find the coin, and you need to leave Manzanillo.”

“Tell me who sent you.”

“I can’t do that, señor.”

“Okay, well, this conversation has become super boring then. Vamanos.”

“Señor, where are you taking me!”

“Oh right. Better put this back in for the little trip down to the water so you don’t cause a scene.”

*******************************************

“One last chance to tell me what this is all about before you enjoy a few days at sea…right, right. I keep forgetting the gag…now, are you gonna talk?”

“Señor, I cannot tell you what I do not know. What are you going to do with me?”

“See, I don’t believe you, señor. So, you’re going to take a little vacation. I’ll leave the gag off. I’m sure you’ll figure out how to get to the water up at the front of the boat. When the sun finally rises you’ll be miles out to sea. When the gas finally runs out, you’ll be even farther. The way I see it, unless you somehow manage to free your hands and feet, it’ll be two or three days before you’re rescued and dumped back on shore. So I’ll have plenty of time to get the answers that you won’t give me. Adios muchacho.”

“Señor! señor do not do this! You don’t know what you’re getting into. I can help you!”

“Oh, I’m sorry, the time for being helpful has passed. You’ll be fine. Probably. Bon voyage!”

**************************************

“Ummm excuse me! Can you take a picture of us?”

“I’m in a bit of a hurry, honestly.”

“Do you have a meeting in the empty, old mansion on top of this hill? Please, there’s no one else around and we don’t want another selfie.”

“Okay, real quick. Right here?”

“That’s perfect. Be sure to get as much of the Casa in the picture as you can.”

“Got it.”

“Oh, hang on - we’re going to have a picnic on the roof of the mansion. We’ve heard the views are amazing. Care to join us? We brought wine…”

“Well - that does sound like my kind of trouble, but I’m afraid I have to pass.”

“What could be so important way out here in the jungle?”

“A portal to another dimension is opening on the porch off the upstairs den of the abandoned mansion, and if I’m ever going to make it back to my galaxy, I have to walk through it before it closes.”

“Um okay, well, maybe another time, spaceman. That is easily the most interesting rejection anyone’s ever given me. C’mon Rachel.”

************************************************

“C’mon…just give me one bar of service you old phone…”

“If you’re getting this message, I’m either asleep or dead. If I’m asleep, I’ll call you back within four hours. If you don’t answer, I’ll assume you’re dead. Do not leave a message.”

“So dramatic, Larry.”

**********************************************

“Hey! Spaceman! Did you miss your portal?”

“Just barely. Any wine left for me?”

“Plenty. We’ll have to share a glass though. I didn’t bring a third.”

“Gross.”

“Hey now!”

“Fine, fine, if those are your terms. I’m Ry.”

“Ry…I like that. I’m Abigail. This is Rachel. Now, what are you really doing up here today?”

“Wow, no small talk, huh? Ah what the hell - three men in two days have attacked and tried to kill me looking for a gold coin they think I have. I needed to make a discreet phone call to try to end this nonsense, so that I can get back to sand, cervezas, y señoritas.”

“A gold coin? Like an old gold coin?”

“I don’t know. I'm hoping my phone call can clear a few details like that up.”

“Maybe it’s from that shipwreck. Remember, the one we read about online when we were searching for something fun to do?”

“Oh the SS Golden Gate?”

“Yeah! That’s it!”

“The Golden Gate?”

“Yeah, it was this old ship that left from San Francisco and was going to Panama or something, but it only made it as far as Manzanillo. It was sometime in the 1860s, I think. It caught fire and sank. There was $1.4 million in gold on the ship. Apparently most of it was recovered but not all of it. Some of the treasure was said to be stolen by a gang of Mexican thieves not long after it was recovered in the late 1800s, but some of it is still at the bottom of the sea.”

“Do you think you have a coin from the Golden Gate?”

“I don’t have a coin, so no. But maybe.”

“I think your phone is buzzing.”

“Hey Larry - good to know you’re not dead.”

“How many times do I have to tell you not to call me Larry you beach bum?”

“Oh Lare - c’mon now, you know you’d feel like I was mad at you if I called you Lawrence.”

“What do you want?”

“Are you still somewhere around Fort Bliss these days?”

“Maybe. Why?”

“I need a favor.”