A veiled epoch

Clinging vessels were as usual the wake up call for Chinna. He lay on a dried palm leaf mat covered in a faded thin .He could see the clear white sky through the cracked terra-cotta roof. Last night he slept holding his kaleidoscope .. the one he had made from scratch,now lying safely next to him. The other boys laughed when he told them his plan to make one and today he would prove them wrong. Drops of excitement slowly formed on his otherwise painfully deserted heart. He sat up.. the kaleidoscope safe and secure on his lap as he folded his hands to recite a quick prayer. A practice from the time he could remember and enforced daily by his mother. But not anymore. He was already hungry. The grumbling of his empty tummy was cruel. But there were rules. Strict ones... the first one.. bath is the first thing in the morning. He sat near the hissing fire on the moist muddy floor , clean and fresh,as his sister carefully placed a pot of steaming porridge and buttermilk in front of him. He drained the pot fleetly. Wiping the drizzles  of  buttermilk from the corner of his mouth he got up hurriedly holding his kaleidoscope. Sliding his feet into a worn out pair of sandals with overstretched laces .. he was ready to run out when his sister grabbed his hand pulling him closer to her. “ listen Chinna.. you might hear something.. hurtful ... today.. as usual..you know from people.. just ignore it.. “ her thin fingers running through his wet hair trying to align them in to something aesthetically acceptable .. she bent down and looked in to his eyes.. “ don’t let anyone make you feel bad.. and remember I will be with you.. always..” her eyes looked tired and puffy .. maybe a little red.. was she crying?? Maybe from the smoke of burning woods.. mom’s eyes were red and puffy too.. he remembered.. and she always said “ it’s the smoke from the chula ( the wood burning kind of stove) he was lost in his thoughts when their baby brother began hysterically screaming and kicking the cloth hammock trying to get out. His sister kissed his forehead before she rushed to pick up their baby brother. Akka.. ( elder sister in local language)looked different.. she was this quiet bookworm ..papery pale and skinny but always well kept. A straight A student .. teachers were awed and perhaps a little intimidated by her knowledge .. but no friends. Reading every bit of paper that came her way.. she was always looking for new things to master. It was like some unknown war she was fighting and she had to win..In essence ..She was his exact opposite.he was not very fond of her or her dull boring life anyways..But today.. with no school or books.. her world changed .. . hair tied up in to a wet bun .. she was now busy running around to get things done..taking care of everything at home... she looked older.. she looked like mom.  

Chinna walked out of the house holding on to the kaleidoscope when he saw his father crushing half burned cigarette mercilessly with his feet.. engaged in futile conversation .. tearing down every bit of dignity his mother had left..

The playground ,which was once a luscious paddy field , was already alive with little boys running around. Chinna happily ran towards them waving his kaleidoscope. The boys were pleasantly amazed as they gathered around him to take a closer look. 

After all the admiration and acceptance he received..Chinna felt better as he walked home. But the terrifying emptiness still lingered..

As he stepped into his house he could hear distant chatter coming from the kitchen. His sister sat on the cold floor rocking their baby brother in her lap in the middle of a congregation of women.

“ It was horrible what your mother did”

“ How can a mother leave her children?? That too for a man much younger than herself “

“How can a woman be so selfish?”

“ This poor girl is going to have a cursed life now”

Talking among themselves... yet loud enough ..obnoxious words wrapped in fake pity .. enjoying the little girl’s misfortune. 

Hiding behind the wooden door listening to them.. Chinna was breathing heavily.Stinging ache  in his heart was blindening. He remembered how the same women would speak to his mother.. how they would make her count her misfortunes.. and how she listened to them silently.. only to sob like a child after they left.

The little girl saw her brother half hiding behind the door .. his tearful little eyes tore through her heart. 

She stood up.. carefully placed the asleep baby in his cloth hammock. 

Her eyes were cold. 

“My mother may not be perfect like all of you but to me she is perfect. She has taught all her children well so quit worrying about us and find someone else to shed your hollow compassion.”

The women froze. Never expecting such strength in a helpless little girl, they left without a word. Chinna was amazed. 

Akka.. he hugged her .

Wash up .. let’s have dinner.. she forced a kind smile.

A loud bang on the door made the kids jump. It was their father , drunk as usual but no mother to hit. So he decided to go about the daily routine of throwing empty vessels.. kicking  and breaking everything in sight.  Chinna sat in the corner with his sister who held their wailing baby brother rocking him like their mother used to. This was not new to him but he was scared today. After breaking everything in sight,he looked for his battered wife. Recollection of memories was difficult but a man doesn’t forget when his wife leaves him for someone else. Gathering all the buildup anger he caught his daughter by hair and dragged her out .Chinna caught his baby brother and held him tight.  He closed his eyes tight.. he knew how this would end.. his mother always had black bruises and bleeding wounds all over her.

A loud thud made him run frantically in to the kitchen. Their father was sitting on the ground.. shocked ..and his Akka stood next to him holding a half burned log . She looked monstrous ... cold fierce eyes now burning in anger .. 

“touch me once again and you are dead”

Chinna froze as he watched his father slowly get up and walk out. 

Night felt darker than usual .. he couldn’t sleep.. He looked at his sister sitting  under the cloth hammock 

Akka.. I wish mom was as strong as you.. 

tears filled his eyes as his sister hugged him.. 

Multicolored fireworks bloomed in the velvety sky as the world welcomed another new year. 

Happy new year Akka.. she smiled..as they looked up the brightly colored sky.. wrapped in a kaleidoscope of colors.. they took silent vows.. she.. to be his solid pillar and he ..to never let her smile fade.