The Lifespan of a Dream

The Lifespan of a Dream

Written by Tammy Varner Hornbeck

           He had come into her life during the aftermath and devastation of a dream dying. She had come into his life as a dream was disintegrating; both believing they would never dream again. Neither of them was young; both had past relationships and marriages whose demons continued to wreak havoc on their hearts and souls. Neither knew if they could trust again, love again, or dream again; but love would prove stronger than their resistance.

           Each night after their evening meal they would take a walk down to the beach near where they lived. Side by side on a blanket they watched the sun’s light slowly fade and counted the stars as they appeared in the coming darkness. This was a new routine for both of them; but it had quickly become essential armor against the world around them.

           “What are we going to dream about tonight?” he asked.

           She squeezed his hand, laid her head upon his shoulder, and answered, “I want to sail around the world.”

           “Really?”

           “Yes. I have wanted to ever since watching Jacques Cousteau on television. I love the ocean and I love boats.”

           “I had the same dream years ago when I was with someone else. She didn’t share the same dream and I gave it up.”

           “I have shared my life with a dreamer.”

           “Neither have I.”

           And so, a new dream was born by of wounded hearts on their last chance of a happily ever after. Through the long workdays, the stress of bills, and the trials of old hurts rearing their ugly heads they kept this same vigil. Whether they were getting along or not; they took their trip to the beach; watched the sun set and shared their thoughts and fears about their newly shared dream. They planned, they talked, they even sometimes argued; but the went without fail.

           They saved for a year and they found a live-a-board boat and bought it. They moved from their one-bedroom apartment onto the boat and began the work of cleaning, organizing, and repairing the inside first. Every spare dollar was put into repairs and supplies. No matter what, at sunset they stopped and sat out on the pier where they were moored and watched the stars appear. Month after month they saved and worked on the boat replacing rigging, repairing, or replacing sails, working on the boat engine, replacing the electronics piece by piece. One year, that was their goal to sail off into the sunset in one year. Three hundred and sixty-five days. One fall. One winter. One spring. One last school year for her as a special education teacher. One last year as a medical technician in the hospital working nights.

           She kept her hope alive by creating check lists of work to be done and things needing purchased then marking them off. He kept his hope alive by watching sailing videos on YouTube. She kept a daily log on their progress in a journal. He kept a check list of repairs and things needed in a small pocket spiral. When the day was over and only after they had returned from their time on the pier; did they compare notes and discuss the next steps or the next sacrifice they had to make to make sure that they reached their goal. Little by little they cut down on luxuries. First, they cancelled their cable service. Next, after waiting for their phone contract to end they signed up for two phones and internet with Consumer Cellular. They cut down on their grocery bill by streamlining their meals similar to those they would be eating if they were at sea. This was hardest on her because she was a country girl who loved to cook and bake. They made a trip back to Texas where they had all their worldly goods in a storage unit. They spent a week having a garage sale to sell off anything and everything they could live without and what they kept for sentimental reasons was transferred to a smaller unit, cutting their bill in half.

           Aside from the financing, they had life changes and skills to acquire. They signed up for scuba diving lessons, which was necessary so they could keep the underside of the boat scraped of barnacles and seaweed as well as to shoot videos for their YouTube channel which would be their new source of income. They began preparing for their captain’s licenses by reading books and taking sample tests online. She learned to curb her book addiction by focusing on books that were necessary for their dream. She ordered books on sailing knots such as The Book of Sailing Knots: How to Tie and Correctly Use over 50 Essential Knots by Peter Own. She bought books on repairs and maintenance such as Don Casey’s Complete Illustrated Sailboat Maintenance Manual. She scoured Amazon for books on sailing itself such as The Complete Sailing Manual by Steve Sleight and Ben Ainslie and World Cruising Routes, Eighth Edition by Jimmy Cornell. They went to Home Depot and bought sample ropes to practice and quiz each other on knots. The mental shift from land lovers to sea legs was the hardest to let go of for them both.

           They talked, they laughed, they fought and argued; but the dream stayed alive and survived the leg work of chasing a dream together and then the time had come. He turned in his two weeks’ notice; she completed the last of her teaching tasks for the school year and said her goodbyes. She has had many moments of doubt and found it ironic that just when she had found the perfect school to work for; her dreams would take her away. Now, their bags were packed, and tomorrow they would set sail at first light. They shared a light meal of sandwiches and bottles of Lipton Green Teas. Without speaking a word, they looked at each other, smiled, and joined hands for one last walk down to the beach where they sat in companionable silence and watched the sun set and the stars appear. The dreaming is over for tomorrow their dream will become a reality.