Love Hurts

I looked over at Adam, hoping one day he would forgive me for what I'm about to do. I love him too much for us to go on. The thought of him being alone breaks my heart, but I have to do it.

Just tell him how you feel and explain why you're doing this, but if you tell him the real reason you're leaving him, it's only going to make him want to be with you more.

What if, I act angry at him......

No, you, you can't, he doesn't deserve that, but it will make him get over you better. 

 I walk over to Adam, holding back the tears and anger at myself. He turns around and smiles at me, as he waves his hand to greet me. 

"I wanted to do something special for you this week!"

He said, getting excited like a little kid does when he's about to run downstairs to see what Santa got for him. 

"Seeing that it's almost your birthday and all."

"How about we get a luxurious dinner?"

He says, smirking and using a French accent, grabbing my hand and pulling me closer to him. I couldn't help but laugh at him, but it didn't last long. 

"What's wrong?"

He asked, his smile fading. 

Okay, Lucy, just give him this one perfect night, then break up with him. No, you can't do that, you have to do it now! Act as angry as you can, and break up with him!

"That sounds great Adam, I just hate that you're going to spend so much money on a dinner" 

I say, hoping he bought it. 

"Well, my Lucy deserves the best." 

He said, bowing to me and using the French accent again. 

"Okay then, when do you want to pick me up?"

"Tomorrow at 6,"

He said, his little kid side coming out again. 

I hated doing this, but I want to have one night with him to myself before I leave him, but how could I possibly make him mad? I love him so much, and I couldn't bear to yell at him, but making him mad will make it easier for him to forget about me. 

The next day I debated on what to wear, then I remembered the night we first met I was wearing a yellow dress, so I decided to wear that. I curled my hair and put it in a half up half down hairstyle, and put on the necklace he gave me. I don't know if I could tolerate wearing such a beautiful necklace he gave to me. 

    When Adam comes to pick me up, he is in a teal tuxedo, with his dark brown hair swooped over with gel. 

"You look amazing," He said, taking my arm and leading me to the door.

"Adam?' I say

"Yes?" 

"I want you to know, whatever happens between us, to get everything you want in life."

He looks at me, puzzled for a second, but then says,

"My life is complete as long as you're in it." 

No! What am I doing? Why did I go through with this?

I'm being selfish and I need to stop. If I don't break up with him now, I never will.

We sit down at a booth next to the window, and the waiter asks me what we want to eat. I look at the menu, picking out the cheapest meals I could find. Adam seems to be enjoying every minute of the dinner, under different circumstances I would be having the time of my life, but I know I need to break up with him. I can't stand it any longer, and I look up at Him and say, 

"Adam, …" starting to cry, but I manage to keep most of the tears back. 

"I need to talk to you."

He looks worried, knowing I never cry in front of him unless I have to. 

"Adam, I love you more than I can say, and I want the best for you,"

I say crying for real now.

"Is it about dinner? I know I don't give you a lot, I've just been busy with work, and…"

"No, it's not that. I just don't think we should be seeing each other anymore...."

I say, at this point, I'm crying so much I could fill a pool in my tears. 

"Lucy, I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you!"

he says gently taking my arm, but I pull away.

 "Well, I don't Adam! I don't want to have anything to do with you!!"

I say sobbing but trying to act angry. Adam begins to cry, looking at me disappointed and hurt, but I HAD to do it, I have to make him angry with me, so he'll get over me. I couldn't handle this any longer, I ran to my car and drove away as fast as I could, trying not to cause a wreck from my blurred eyes. 

    That night he texted me a million times, saying it was all going to be okay, and it's alright for me to be angry with him. Why did he have to make this so hard?! I wanted him to be angry with me, but Adam never lost his temper. I just hope one day he'll find the love of his life, he doesn't deserve a dying girl as his girlfriend. I tried to go to sleep, but I couldn't.

Why did I let this relationship go on for this long? I shouldn't have shut him out, but what was I supposed to do?? 

10:45, I got a headache

10:53, I threw up

11:34 I took medication

11:48 I threw up again 

12:16 I called Dr. Hatch

12:37 Dr. Hatch called an ambulance to my house

12:51 I arrive at the hospital

2:15 I can't breathe well

2:31 darkness

Lucy, please answer my calls 9:52

Did I say something wrong? 10:36

I'm sorry Adam, you don't deserve this,

but I can't be with you any more 10:47

Lucy, I don't deserve YOU, please

tell me what I'm doing wrong,

we'll figure it out.10:59

 Adam, I hope you find the

love of your life, and she'll

treat you the way you

deserve. I hope she'll

appreciate you for who

you are. Don't hold back,

do everything you want

to do, I know you will

achieve every goal you

set. 11:38

Please don't leave me Lucy!

You're the only one I'll ever

love, you never gave up on

me and you pushed through

it all even when you shouldn't

 have. 11:57 

Lucy, why are you doing

this? 12:33

I love you so much, Lucy! 1:35

This is Dr. Hatch's office, I regret

to inform you this person

 has passed on and no longer

has this phone number 9:52

What?? 10:11

Ms. Lucy Williams was

diagnosed with Sarcoma

cancer 5 years ago,

and it was not treatable,

I'm sorry. 10:12