The single flame

Vague, cold rain drops were blurring the windows, the outdoor colours now gone looked all grey, but for once, it didn’t bother me. I felt cosy in the glass house, a cup of hot chocolate in my hands, the sweetness filling the air and my veins. 

It felt like a different life, this indifference towards the world was something new, or similar to my ignorance of Earth back on Azazel. But I wasn’t scared of it. I felt safe between the layers of glass, reflecting the outside world but keeping me apart from it. 

Surrounded by the clear crystals it seemed like we were visible, but we truly were more isolated from it than ever, rain dividing the worlds. 

It’s been some days since we took shelter at Terry and his wife’s residence, and we were nearly both completely healed from the injuries. We were recovering fast and getting some good deep sleep together after the hard days, I didn’t know how may, in the Arena. We kept our conversation faint, talking about the environment that was the city and its surroundings, how different it was from the other places we’ve been. We took walks around the fields, to keep our bodies active. We tried to ignore any discussion that will hurt, but one day, we’d have to talk. About what happened after the Arena, about Edgar. And I was ready. I didn’t think too deep about it. That was it now

“So,” I started talking. “About Edgar...” 

“What?” He simply asked, looking at me silently but his eyes fiery with curiosity. 

“I guess... it’s been hard for him, following a person you don’t think is doing good things. But still taking care of her as you try to survive. I always thought he was fine as we always talked about every decision together. Maybe he changed his mind after... Arthur’s incident. Or he would have talked to me first! Or even kill me the first time he could. I guess I messed up, right? Trying to trust those scientists. Giving our blood to test, how could I have imagined they would control us?” 

“You did what you though was right for everyone, Dylan. You can’t save everybody; you did your best.” 

“Exactly, I did what I thought was the best. If something’s good for you, that doesn’t mean it’s good for others. Maybe I am the villain and Edgar is the hero.”

I never asked what was the best choice for them, I feel like I didn’t have the chance, I was distant to people even if I wanted to know them. I was too scared of myself ruining everything. 

“Oh, I so want to slap you.” I was startled, looking in his eyes with my eyebrows raised. But he didn’t let me answer that he rushed to continue speaking, or more like scolding me. 

“What do you want to do for others, Dylan? People don’t need babysitting, we can just live how we want, we don’t need to depend on someone or have someone to depend on us. It’s just the two of us, again. We’re alone, and we will always be. I’m sorry you got involved with me and ruined your pacific exploration.”

“Do you think I would have left you if I had the chance?” I lowered my voice. I had no idea he felt guilty about the situation, he was always cold-blooded and took decision like he was created for it. But the fact that he felt in part responsible made me feel less lonely. To be selfish, he said. 

“My brain says yes but my heart says no. You’re too attracted to this homunculus.” His lips turned upward in a sweet smile, and I dragged my legs over my chest, getting warm from his look. I wanted to hug him tight and never let go. 

“So you have a heart, ah?” I topped my chin on my knees, a playful smile on my face. I was happy he told me those words, but I was so embarrassed I had to stand up to him. 

“That hurts.” Tragedy faked over his face as he placed a hand on his chest. It was nice to joke around with him; his stoic face no more there when I was with him. I felt closer to him than ever. I just had to get myself kicked in the butt more often. Thinking about how the relationship between us grown up made me feel like not everything in my life went wrong.  

“Can you have children?” He spat his tea all over his shirt and pants as I burst into a laugh. My lungs were stinging a bit but his reaction was better than I could ever except. I held my stomach with my arms, trying to recompose myself, my legs back on the floor. 

“You reached a new level of obsession.” He looked over at me folding in half in a laugh, him placing back the mug on the table in front of us and grabbing some napkins to tap his clothes. 

“I’m kidding.” I said tearing up and wiping my eyes dry, my laugh finally over. I sometimes asked myself how we could have a normal life, a normal relationship, as he wasn’t human, but a chemical creation. I wasn’t expecting any response, I wanted to make fun of him for once. 

“The answer’s no. I’m infertile.”

I bit the inside of my cheeks. Crap, he took me seriously. I felt a little guilt. That meant I would never see a tiny Lucifer who was still smarter than me. The thought made a sad smile rise on my lips. He was one of a kind, too unique to be able to recreate. But then again, weren’t all the Azazel resources the same specie as him? Could they be called brothers to him? Brother, even if apparently only one at a time was actually living, apart from him. I still had to get my head around what has been working on Azazel since the launch in space, but neither me and Lucifer could discover more from here. And it wasn’t like we had any chance to get back to space. 

“So you also examinated that.” I bit my lower lip as I realized how he must have tested. This conversation was going in a way too embarrassing direction. 

“... C’mon.” He dropped a hand over his face, his hair running wild between his fingers. He looked young and innocent. Somehow, he was. I chuckled, enjoying how he also felt awkward talking about intimate relationships. 

 “You’re blushing.” I teased him again. His boarded chest and shoulder were slightly distracting, his fit figure showing under the wet fabric of the shirt. In this moment he was so careless and friendly, I wanted to jump on him. 

“Would you not?” He sighed ironically and I could see a small delighted smile hiding under his hand. 

“I’m amused. Not that I would ever think you’ll really look at that under the lenses.” I was being honest, it was something I would never do in his place. He was more curious than me, but not of Earth, about how and what makes him different from other humans, and Reborns as well. 

“I had free time okay? Way too much. But you know that means we could sleep together always, right? Zero precautions.” He pulled his hair back, a huge smirk directed to me. He got me. My eyes opened wide unconscionably and I gaped by surprise, I wanted to say something to get back at him, but the only sound my vocal cords produced was a soft high-pitched moan.  

“Don’t say it like that, homunculus.” I said after I recomposed myself. It was my turn to cover my face with both hands, my cheeks on fire. If I had to be honest my mind might have gone that way sometimes when we were together, but never too deep.

But now we were here, alone, no threads chasing us and vice versa. It was us, in the small glass build, the thin sound of rain, and I could focus on him. On us. I felt my heart pound hard in my chest, wanting to get close to him for real. Feel him closer, like never before. I wanted him, and no wound would stop me. His lips, that I always struggled to get thought as he spoke strange questions to me, his thin lips I tasted and felt hot and snug against mine. His always gentle, big and soft hands. His way too hot to be human skin, feeling like I would never need a blanket in winter if I was sleeping with him, as in these days I cheered. Another thought that made me blush hard. I had to stop or I would implode by too many stimuli caused by one immortal guy. I breathed slowly, my hands slipping down my face to get back to him. His gaze still locked with mine, his smile now more sweet, ready to catch me in his arms. And I had no reason to retreat now. 

I shifted my body sideways to him, and doing leverage on my legs I straddled his hips, my breathing dull in my lungs, a carnal desire swelling inside me. 

“Dylan...” His sighed deep for a moment, his hands slipping over my legs to possessively grab my thighs, the heat of his touch travelling through the fabric. His big eyes filled with a dark blue shade of desire. Tonight, I’d take the lead, I wouldn’t stop to my inhibition. My hands met with his face, tracing his jawline, and placing a small finger on his lower lip, faintly pulling it. The corners of his lips curled up as he lifted his face to angle it with mine, and I lowered to kiss him hard, daring and possessive. 

I embraced my instincts, squeezing my body closer to his, his chest brushing mine. My hands slipped down his neck, touching his collarbone and rushing them to infiltrate the bottom of the shirt, feeling his tender skin for the first time. I shivered. I embed my fingers in his hips, and moved back to the shirt, pulling it silently demanding him to remove it. Understanding at the same moment, he hoisted his back from the couch, parting from my lips in time to pull his wet shirt off. He embraced my body tight, his hands now slipping inside the back of my shirt as I went on his reddened lips, tangling my fingers in his messy hair. I wanted more. Goosebumps over my skin, I detracted my face from his and bit my lips, blushing more shades of redness as I lowered my eyes on his now bare, sturdy fitted, perfect pale, chest. His breath was minty and cold on my skin, his eyes observant and passionate. I closed mine for a second, feeling a flame ignite inside my chest. I couldn’t stand his intimate stare: it was driving me crazy. I felt the ardent touch of his lips over my forehead, cheeks and slowly trailing his path down my neck. A soft whine escaped my mouth as he giggled over my skin, sending vibrating stings. 

I suddenly squeezed my thighs around him, another noiseless request I knew was common. Make one step further. We wanted to release our desires, let them go higher. He hummed, lifting his head back. His face determinate but worried. 

“Oh, don’t look at me like that. I started, and we’ll get to the finish line.” He grinned at me, licking his lips, the small worrisome shade in his eyes disappearing, his pupils wider, eaten by bright blue desire. And it was all for me. He lifted himself to stand up, effortlessly carrying my body over his, my legs now tied behind his lower back, my arms floating around his neck, a nervous smile arose on me. It was still my first time. 

As he dropped me hardly on the mattress I gasped, not expecting a direct and rough approach. I snapped a thread in him, gave him a go that would let him do everything he wanted to me, a more enticing and provocative switch turned on. He kneeled down over me, my shirt half away up my chest, and he placed a hand on my tummy, slowly making his way up caressing me. 

“Can’t withdraw now, Dylan. I won’t be sorry.” The voice low, his seducing whisper right in my ear. I wasn’t cold, but the chills were never-ending. Lowering on top of my body, his eager hands and mouth all over me, stripping each other to the skin. 

I let my mind go, collapsing under his leading command of submission. I didn’t think, we explored ourselves, alone, slowly and passionately, as we were the only people in the entire universe. We needed each other, and we wanted to bond together, in that moment. 

He kept going with his sweet tender but malicious hunt on my body, placing wet kisses in intimate spots, his eyes focusing only on me, enjoying every single reactions. He took a longer moment when he found the scar on my thigh, tracing it slowly with one finger and next, his tongue, my cured skin ever more sensitive. 

“Can’t believe I need to thank a Reborn for having you with me right now.” I pouted at his words, sweat drenching my forehead. 

“Well, it’s thanks to you I’m alive.” He closed his eyes and bit my skin inside my thigh, the opposite side of the scar and I moaned in response, surprised. 

“No, you survived this alone. You’re determinate in everything you do. And now you’re here, your body will be mine, like all of you already is.” He lifted his luminous gaze from my leg to meet mine, bright blue and lilac shaded eyes staring at my exposed soul. “And you’re beautiful. Your body, your skin marked with your past, those cold curious eyes, your soft pink tasty lips, all is mine. You probably never realised how damn soft and attracting is your body, Dylan, I feel like I want to eat you up.” 

What was I supposed to answer? My insides and outsides were overheating, I was feeling the same. If this was how Paradise would be, it would collapse over the feeling of love that was growing in me. 

There was something off with the switch I turned on in Lucifer, and I loved every piece of it, deeply. I was conscious of how I immediately switched over that word, but it was becoming too much to not express it. His body moved rising over mine so he would be back on my level, a serious look on his face. The expression of deep burning craving. I finally felt him there, the fire between my tights escalating. The words left my mouth on their own, leaving me surprised as well. 

“Lucifer, I love you.” A soft, timid thrill. But I felt confident. It was the thing I wanted to say, too big to keep it inside. I wanted to give it all to him. 

He smiled and his eyes sweetened as he kissed me slowly and caring, his strong arms embracing my body closer to him. He didn’t answer, but he didn’t need to. I knew he wasn’t sure of what was his feeling, being a non-human had its challenging question to put onto test, and love was one of these. It wasn’t science. But we both were sure he cared and desired me, and I was happy with him showing it over words. Those could come later. 

It was our hot white night; we could melt away. Covered with nothing, a body-on-body parade. Becoming one with Lucifer. And it was like I was reborn, not in a deadly meaning. His heat, his touch, his swelling pleasure mixing with mine. But it felt right, there was nothing we wanted more than this. What would happen in the future would be left for after, we only wanted this moment, graven in our minds, our hearts.