The Accident

Brent: Accident

I groan and turn my head. There is so much pain. Pain is everywhere. In my fingertips and all the way to my head. I try to open my eyes but whatever is around me is so bright that it hurts.

Finally, I can open my eyes all the way, and I sweep the room. Around me I hear a beeping and breathing. I quickly find that the breathing is me and the beeping is the heart monitor that is taking my heart rate. My vision blurs, but I soon find the eyes of a woman with dark hair and a blue mask.

“Can you tell me your name?” the woman asks. Her voice echos. Is that just in my head, or are we in an echoey room?

“Where am I? What happened?” I ask weakly. My voice sounds muffled.

“You were in an accident. Now, can you tell me your name?”

I stare at the woman for a moment. My name? Yeah, my name . . .

“I don’t . . .” I start, but my vision goes black for what seems like a second.

When I open my eyes next I am in the same room, and someone with brown hair sits against the wall next to me. She is on a cell phone, using her thumb to scroll.

I try to lift my hand to catch her attention, but just the thought gives me pain. I groan and close my eyes tight, trying to ignore the pain.

The girl looks up, and her eyes grow wide. “Brent!” She stands quickly, walking over to me. Her eyes fill with tears that start to drip from her eyes and down her face. “Oh, Brent . . .”

I stare at her. I have a dull feeling that she is someone close, someone special . . .

“Olivia,” I say, recalling my younger sister’s name. Olivia puts her hand over her mouth and falls to her knees at my bedside.

“I’m bad, ain’t I? I did something bad,” I say.

Olivia sobs into her hand and shakes her head. “No, Brent. You’re good. Mom and Dad are just . . . and you’re . . .”

“Mom and Dad?” I ask. “Where are they?”

Olivia wipes her tears and takes my hand, causing me pain. Her brown eyes are serious now, staring into mine with full intent.

“Oh, Brent. They were in the accident with you. You survived and you’ll be fine, but Mom and Dad are—” Her next word is only a whisper that could easily get lost in the wind. “—dead.”

The next few days in the hospital are spent with me falling in and out of consciousness, and me asking Olivia about Mom and Dad. Every time I wake up, I tell myself it’s just a dream, that Mom and Dad are completely fine. But every time Olivia reminds me that they’re dead I feel like it’s my fault. Even though the night of the accident is a blank space in my mind, I still feel like I did something to contribute to their deaths.

Once I am able to stay conscious for more than half an hour, a therapist starts seeing me regularly. At first I just let him talk to me, letting the silence drag on as he waits for me to respond to his questions. Although he is very patient with me, and after two days I begin to talk with him and the doctors. Olivia cried happy tears when I shot a pick-up line at one of the younger doctors. She was pretty, with a nice smile. But I don’t know why it made Olivia so happy.

After two weeks I’m allowed out of the hospital. Olivia and I take the bus, even though I can drive. She doesn’t want me to, and for good reason. The only thing during therapy that I would talk about was how much I hated cars and how I never wanted to drive again.

When we get home all is quiet. At first, I didn't even follow Olivia inside the house. But eventually she grabs my hand and drags me inside.

Inside, a group of three people sit on the couch. They all stand when I enter, staring with wide eyes. A girl with blonde hair and dark eyes, a boy with bright red hair and pale eyes, and a boy with black hair and dark eyes.

“Oh my God, Brent!” The girl with blonde hair exclaims, rushing up to me and hugging me so quickly I stumble backward. When the smell of her perfume comes over me, I remember everything.

I hug her tighter and bury my face in her hair as she cries. All of the pain that I had felt before is now gone and I feel this sudden peace with her arms around me, despite her crying.

“Addilyn,” I whisper, reminding myself of her name. She nods and sniffles, pulling away. I touch my palm to her cheek, wiping her wet face with my thumb. She’s prettier than the young doctor, and suddenly I feel bad about that pick-up line.

I face the two boys. The one with bright red hair who I know is Dexter embraces me first, wrapping his arms around me and patting my back with strong force.

The next boy with dark hair and eyes embraces me next, patting my shoulder but not hugging me. I remember that Jax was never the kind of guy to show affection, and a pat on the shoulder is the best he does.

“We were all so worried that you would be disabled or something,” Dexter says. “Jax and I didn’t know how we would play football without you.” Jax grins and nods.

Addilyn takes my hand and intertwines her fingers with mine, and a sudden heat starts buzzing in my chest. “All they could think about was the football super-star they would lose. I was worried that you were . . . you know . . .” Olivia must have told them about Mom and Dad.

“It’s alright, guys. I’m fine. There’s nothing to worry about now,” I say, even though it’s mostly a lie.

Olivia grins. “Nothing to worry about?” She pats my stomach. “What about dinner? You’re a better cook than any of us, Brent.”

I sigh. “Fine. I’ll cook dinner.”

Addilyn squeezes my hand and then drops it. “I’ll help you. I bought some frozen pizzas, so we can just pop those in the oven. No need to go all out after you’ve just come out of the hospital.”

I smile at her softly and kiss her forehead, which causes a chain reaction of “ewwww!” and “get a room, you two! Gross.”

Addilyn and I just grin, glancing at them. I lean down a second time, aiming for her lips, but she puts a finger on my lips to stop me.

“Not now,” she whispers. “Later, when we’re alone.”

We follow the nurse down the hallway towards Brent’s room. When she opens the door and I see him on the bed, I rush to his side. It takes so much of me to not cry out at his appearance. He looks like he could be . . .

No, I scold myself. Don’t think like that. You can’t think like that.

I take his bruised hand and press his palm to my cheek, so it’s like he’s holding my face in his hand like he often does when he kisses me.

Tears run down my face and I stare at him, murmuring, “Don’t die on me, Shadow boy. You can’t die on me. You’re my shadow.”

I repeat the words over and over, the tears continuing to run down my face without running dry.

You can’t die on me. You’re my shadow.

When I get off the bus I walk down the street, going the way that I went the day Brent fell out of the tree. I am living in old memories, when suddenly I come upon a breathtaking sight that nearly brings me to tears.

Red and pink streamers are weaved into the trees, red and pink hearts hanging from the branches. The picnic table that looks onto the stream is decorated with a white table cloth, and on top of it sits a plate of heart-shaped chocolates.

Valentine’s day! I had completely forgotten!

I turn around and see Brent approaching, a big grin on his face.

“It seems my shadow went ahead of me this time, hm?” I say with a smile.

“Seems so,” he says as he stops in front of me. He looks at the decorations, still smiling. “Do you like it?”

I turn around and sigh. “Like is an understatement. Brent, I love it. I thought Jax went all out, but this . . .”

We sit down at the table and I pick out one of the chocolates. I break it open to reveal a white inside.

“Oh my God, Brent. I can’t believe you,” I say as I stick the chocolate into my mouth.

He grins. “What?”

“How in the world did you know that creme filled chocolates are my favorite?”

“Olivia told me. I asked her.”

“Of course she told you.” Olivia can never keep her mouth shut about anything. “I’m guessing she told you that I have had a crush on you, too?”

He raises his eyebrows. “No, she didn’t tell me that.”

My cheeks suddenly burn, and I have to look away.

Brent sighs. “But . . . I suspected as much. And I’ve been obvious about my feelings from the beginning.”

I turn to look at him again, one eyebrow raised. “You have? When were you obvious? I didn't know until now.”

He laughs. “Really? Me following you around all of freshman year didn’t give it away at all?”

I shrug. “I thought you just wanted to be my friend. That’s what you kept asking me, anyway.”

He grins. “Well, all along I wanted to be more than friends.”

I watch as his cheeks turn bright red just like mine, and he looks down at the table. “Uh, sorry. I’m being cheesy, I know. Olivia informed me on all the romantic pick-up lines from her movies.”

I laugh. “No, no. You’re fine. That was sweet.” But I can’t help feeling a bit awkward, too.

The silence drags on, neither of us saying anything.

“Well,” I say finally. “These chocolates aren’t going to eat themselves. We don’t have to make out like those movies.” I look him in the eyes, and he smiles. “That’s not how we are.”

The rest of our first Valentine’s day as a couple was spent talking and eating chocolates, and enjoying each other’s company. For some girls, all they want to do is kiss a guy. But when it comes to liking Brent, kind, compassionate, understanding Brent, all you want to do is talk.