Dedicated to You

'Looking out at the raising waves, listening to them crash against the shore, I laid back on the warm sun-kissed sand. I couldn’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be. Gripping your hand softly and glancing over at the deep sea blue butterfly on the tip of your nose as you slept, I smiled.

I noticed your eyes begin to flutter slightly as the sky let out a low growl. Reaching over, I caressed your cheek softly, tracing over your soft, strawberry lips before going back up to the corner of your eye. Watching you slowly fall back to sleep, I looked back up at the sky.

I couldn’t help but let out a small sigh of relief. How could I not? Everything I could ever want was laying right next to me. I turned over onto my side and kissed your cheek gently, watching the butterfly flutter like a cloud into the sky.

Turning my head towards the quickly setting sun, I slowly raised from my spot on the sand, letting go of your hand and, in turn, bending down and lifting you off the ground, smirking as you griped my sundress.

Carrying you to the house as the tiger in the sky growls once more, I couldn’t help but feel another slight tug at the corners of my lips. A warm night, much like this one, was the first day I laid eyes on you.

The way your lavender hair circled around your face near your chin. That flower crown adorning your head, the soft crimson lipstick making your sky-blue eyes pop. You made yourself as irresistible as gravity itself. You look just as gorgeous now as you did then.

The accent of your voice…It truly makes me think my parents have mispronounced my name all my life. The butterflies I felt in my stomach that one day have remained inside my heart ever since then. I guess all I am trying to say, is that I love and loved you more than you shall ever know.

You were my muse. The inspiration behind my story. The magnet that pulled my words onto the page. As I write this dedication for you, I find a lack of words to describe my appreciation for all you have done. I know these words won't reach you until I meet you once again in heaven, but I couldn't think of writing this to anyone else. Written for the one who shall always hold my heart, my longing for you as strong as that of the tides for the moon, my darling Rogue, until I see you once again.'

Shutting the book, Alex let's out a deep sigh. Had it really been six months since her fiancee's passing? She poured her heart and soul into her first book, the one Rogue had always encouraged her to write, since that fatal day. Raising from her seat, Alex picks up her manuscript, placing it neatly within a binder before walking out the door with it. Making her way to the clearing overlooking the sea, the place where a small headstone dwelled, Alex sits upon the sand before it.

"Can you see, my darling? Are you watching? I finished it, just for you, just like you always wanted. Do you remember what day today was supposed to be? How I wish I was able to see you in that dress, you spent so long making it yourself. I know you would have looked stunning, walking down the aisle, the gods and goddesses would have stopped to admire your beauty. If only you had not gone out for a run that night...If only that driver hadn't had so much to drink...If only he hadn't drunkenly passed out behind the wheel of that bronco...If only I had told you not to go..."

Leaning back, Alex lays upon the sandy shores, stretching her hand up towards the clouds above, remaining silent until she notices the deep blue butterfly resting upon the grave of her loved one.

"Ah, I see you miss her as well. Or perhaps she sent you herself? Heh, even within the afterlife, my darling, you are still so full of surprises. You never did like it when I allowed those darkened thoughts to possess my mind, to clutch my heart. Your smile always lifted my spirits, it was like you controlled gravity, the way you made my heart float and flutter like a butterfly."

Sitting up, she pushes her long black hair out of her face before wiping the streams coming from her eyes. Her heart hurt, the memory of her best friend, the thought of the memories they never got to make, hung heavy like chains bound to her soul. Watching the butterfly flutter away, she couldn't help but feel the tension lift every so slightly. Even without Rogue being next to her, she could feel her there, within her sense of pride over her story, her feeling of love for the women she once admired. She would always be with her, within her heart, within the words she wrote.

"I suppose I should get goin I need to deliver this to my manager so we can begin the process of getting it published. Thank you, my love, for all the courage you've bestowed upon me. Even though you don't stand here physically, your spirit lives within these words. The words you inspired and encouraged me to dictate on pen and paper."

Taking a deep breath, Alex stands, brushing off her black dress before making her way to her vehicle. So many emotions flooded her heart, but two stung the most. The overflowing joy of accomplishing one of her major goals, and the deafening scream of longing for the one she wished to share this joy with. Getting into her '89 Chevy Impala, the vehicle she had bought for Rogue on their third anniversary, the day she proposed, Alex begins to make her way into town.

"You used to love this drive, I despised it until I saw the sparkle in your eyes when we passed the flower fields lining the edge of town. I never saw the beauty in it until it flashed across your face. You know, I was going to make your bouquet out of flowers from this field, I could only imagine how your eyes would have lit up. The stars would have been envious."

Pulling up the cage where she was to meet her manager, Alex makes her way to the door, stopping short of opening it. Was she truly ready for this? Could she really accomplish this? She had to try, if not for her own sake, then to honor the memory of the one who pushed her so much to accept and try this feat. Taking a deep breath, she pushes open the door, silently thanking the gods and goddesses for her inspiration, her love, her best friend, her Darling Rogue, one last time.