Grizzly Sam Addams

Grizzly Sam Addams

Howard Seeley

The sound of the passing street car woke Sam up. As he rolled on his side, his tattered blanket fell to the curb. Huh. Another day. He scratched his unkempt beard, wondering how much lice were living in there with him. Sam picked up the blanket and stuffed it in his backpack. He stood and got his bearings. Howard Street and Arena Parking. Yup. Been here before and probably will be again. He started walking towards Baltimore Street. The 7-Eleven should have some good stuff in their dumpster.

As he walked, he asked himself his age-old question. How did I get here? Sam Addams grew up like most people. He was an average student, one sister and caring parents. Yes, things were going fine for him, until September 11, 2001.

In 2001, Sam was a senior, looking forward to graduating in June, until that tragic day. His plans for college were dashed and he began to wait for that day in June to come. Not so he can look forward to college, but to enlist in the Army. Like many young men in that era, Sam desired to serve his country and help fight in the war against terror. And so, he waited.

When his parent heard of his plans, they did sit by idly. That evening, the battle began. His parents tried to discourage from enlisting at such an early age. “Go to college first,” they said. “Make something of yourself before you decide. If you still wish to join the military afterwards, you’ll have our blessings.” The battle raged on from September to June, but their efforts were in vain.

Even though his parents lost the battle, they took comfort in knowing they had allies during that time. Many of his friends told him about the career opportunities available in the Army and he gave them serious thought. They even told him to graduate first. That way, he could be commissioned and become an officer.

Sadly, there was an adversary, they couldn’t overcome. SFC Frederick Mosby was the local Army recruiter. He was a short, stout man, who served in Vietnam at the tail end of the conflict. When he saw Sam Addams, he knew he had his man. When he saw Sam, he thought he was looking at himself, from a time long past. He took Sam under his wing and lead him down the path, he once followed, the path to become an infantry soldier. He told Sam the Army was short on infantry soldiers and he would be doing a great service to his country. “Our nation needs you, son,” he said. “And you have a responsibility to your country. What, say you?” He handed Sam a copy of a delayed enlistment contract.

Sam glanced at the contract and a sense of belonging came over him. How could I refuse? He picked up a pen and began to sign all the blocks.

June came, and Sam was off to Fort Jackson for boot camp. Before he knew it, basic training was over, and he was off to Advanced Individual Training. The training was difficult but rewarding at the same time.

It was August 2002. Ironically, we would have entered college, if he took another career path. But instead, his day of graduation arrived. Before the commencement ceremony began, he received his orders. He looked at them to see where he was going to be assigned. When he saw the duty assignment, he was sadly disappointed. Instead of going to Iraq to oust Saddam Hussein, he was going to Afghanistan, to fight the Taliban. Who cared about some third world country, where they lived like they were in the twelfth century? But orders were orders and two weeks later, he was landing in Kabul.

It was downhill from there. The first day he went on patrol, a HMMWV, patrolling in front of him, ran over an IED and exploded. The screams of the injured soldiers pierced his ears and never to leave his mind. He ran out to treat the casualties and found them missing limbs and severely burned. This vision, as well was a perpetual visitor.

He did his best to stop the bleeding and tended them until medics arrived. When the medics left, his hands started shaking and wouldn’t stop. That night, he crawled into bed and tried to sleep, but sleep evaded him. The thought of the limbless casualties haunted him along with the sound of screams. Tears rolled down his cheeks.

The next morning, he went on sick call and the doctor gave him something to help him relax. Fortunately, his patrol was uneventful, that day, but that evening, the nightmares began.

For the next year, Sam experienced many days of horror mixed with those days of peace. One morning, Sam’s roommate came in and found Sam trying to hang himself.

Sam was shipped off the next morning to Walter Reed, where they filled him full of various chemicals. Sam got to the point where he could barely remember who he was and at that point, he was released from the service and left to his own devices.

The sun was just coming over the rise, when Sam reached his destination. He was pleasantly surprised to find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. The clerk, working the graveyard shift, threw away the outdated food in the 7-Eleven. The dumpster had more to give, than he could take.

Sam started down Howard Street, chewing on a ham and cheese sandwich, when he was intercepted by a stranger. “Excuse me sir,” he said. You do you happen to be a veteran?”

Sam looked at him suspiciously. “Maybe, so. Why do you ask?”

“Oh, no particular reason. I was just wondering why you’re still living on the street.”

Sam shrugged his shoulders. “This is my home. Where else would I live?”

The stranger stuck his hand out. “My name is James.”

Sam was doubtful about James’s intentions. Still he shook his hand. “I’m Sam.”

James smiled. “Nice to meet you. I was just about to buy a cup of coffee. Would you care to join me?”

Sam couldn’t remember if he was ever in a 7-Eleven store before. He looked inside and saw how bright it was lit.

James touched Sam’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. It doesn’t bite. We’ll go in together. Reluctantly, Sam walked in the store. Within minutes, both walked out, each with a cup of coffee in their hands.

“See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?” said James.

Sam cracked a smile. How long has it been since I had coffee? he said. As a matter of fact, how long has it been, since I smiled? Sam couldn’t answer either question.

His thoughts were interrupted by James’s voice. “Sam, I’m wondering if I you have a moment, I could show you something.”

Red flags raised and the constant sound of comrades, screaming in agony, surged to the front of his mind. Instinctively, he wanted to run away, but by a single strand of resiliency, he didn’t. “What is it?” he asked.

James laughed. “An opportunity to better yourself,” he said.

“I am, who I am,” said Sam. “I can’t change that.”

“You’re right, Sam. You can’t change who you are, but you can change the way you live.” The smile left James’s face. “Do you like living on the street?”

Sam shrugged his shoulders. “It’s my home.”

“But it wasn’t always, was it?”

Sam searched through his foggy memory. Through the cries of pain, he could hear the echoes of laughter from a time long forgotten. The sound of children playing and his mother singing in the kitchen.

The sound of an explosion rattled through his mind and brought him back to the present. “No, it wasn’t,” said Sam. There was a time before today.”

“Would you like to return to that time? That time when you were at peace, a place where you can truly call home?”

Sam dropped his head. “I miss home.”

James began to walk, and he followed. They continued down the street, until they reached their destination. Sam peered through the glass walls and saw several guards and security equipment. The feeling of foreboding began to creep through him. He stepped back from the door.

As he did, James called out. “Don’t worry, Sam. They’re not there to hurt you, but to protect you. Breathe deep and relax. It only takes a minute to pass through them.”

Sam did as he was told. He pushed on the revolving door and entered. He stepped up to the guards and allowed himself to be searched. Then, he was through. Sam sighed with relief and found himself shuffled to the VA’s Public Contact Office.

He sat in the waiting area and found, he wasn’t the only one there. A young woman, who he sat next to, stared at him and quickly changed her seat. Sam looked at himself and realized there wasn’t much to look at. He couldn’t remember ever washing his clothes and wasn’t sure if it was one week or two, since he had a shower.

He was about to get up and leave, when James spoke out again. “Please, Sam, stay. You’re almost at the finish line. Don’t give up on yourself, now.”

The finish line. Did I ever race? Sam tried to think back. He seemed to remember he was a track runner in high school. Coach Robinson always said, “The race isn’t over, until you quit.” More determined than ever, Sam continued to wait.

Finally, the receptionist called his name. Sam went to the counter. “Good morning, sir. My name is Rachel. Thank you for serving our country. How may I help you?”

Sam was speechless. His memory was poor, but he knew for sure he was never called sir and more than that, no ever thanked him for doing his duty to his country. He turned back to James. “What do I say?” he asked.

Rachel looked at Sam questionably. “Who are you talking to sir?”

It was Sam’s turn to be confused. “James, of course.”

“I’m sorry, sir, but there’s no one there.”

Sam looked back again. He looked at James. “I don’t understand. What’s she talking about?”

“Think back, Sam. We met before. Don’t you remember?”

Sam struggled with his thoughts. “Afghanistan,” he said. “The IED. There was a casualty. I stopped the bleeding, but it was too late. I administered CPR, but it didn’t help.”

The image of James began to fade. “Who was he?” he asked.

Sam tried to remember. The image of the horror returned. He looked at the man laying on the ground. He was wearing an Army uniform and had the rank of corporal. The uniform was smeared in blood, but the name tag was untouched. He read the name. James.

The look of recognition came across his face. “I’m scared. What am I supposed to do?”

“Trust, Sam. Trust these people. And when the time comes, pay it forward.” Then, James was gone.

Sam turned back towards Rachel and wiped the tears from his face. “Ma’am, I need help. I’m homeless and I’m sick.”

Rachel broke out in a big smile. “Sir, we’re here to help. Stay right here and I’ll get someone to see you right away.”

As Sam stood there, a sense of peace enveloped him. For the first time, in a long time, he felt something he thought he lost all together. Hope. Whether James saw a ghost or an old memory, it didn’t matter. Either way, he came to save him. God does work in mysterious ways.