Special Silence

January 20th, 11:11 am

Her. I watched as she walked in the coffee shop, gorgeous long blonde hair that fell perfectly into ringlets that clung tight to her head. She stared at the ground, and I could tell she was reluctant to be here. I watched as her brother (I think) tapped her shoulder and asked her a question. Her lips curled into a smile and it was contagious. I found myself smiling at her, but just to myself. I kept watching as she went and ordered. She looked like an angel, her pale skin, her hair, and her eyes were perfect. They were like emeralds, speckled with gold. I think I love her. I turned to leave and then I lost sight of her. Panicking trying to find her, I ended up smashing into her, coffee spilling everywhere, and in all the madness we locked eyes. We rose off the floor and I was too stunned to speak. She was even more gorgeous up close. Her features were like someone carved them into perfect detail. She was dainty and tall. She had to be around my age. “H-hi,” I  stumbled over my words as my cheeks flushed. She smiled, tucking a curl behind her ear. “Sorry about that, I need to learn to watch where I’m walking.” I opened my mouth to say something else but a barista came toward us, trying to mop up the mess and I quickly swallowed my words. We both waited until she left, leaving us in our awkward silence. Unsure of what to do next, my hand sticks out in front of me and before I can stop myself I blurt out, “I’m Sophia, and I think you're really pretty, in fact I was watching you and that's how we ended up in this mess.” Shocked, my hand flies to my mouth and covers it. She giggled nervously and I could barely hear her when she squeaked her name, “I’m Lily.” She looked like she was about to say something else when her brother waved her over. “I have to go, it was nice meeting you, Sophia.” Lily turned to walk away but stopped, glancing back at me. “I think you’re really pretty too.” And ran off. 

12:00 pm

“Who was that girl you were talking to?” Ben asked as we got closer to the lodge. I fiddled with one of the drawstrings on my hoodie, “Her name’s Sophia.” I couldn't conceal my smile as her name left my lips. I tried to ignore the little flutter in my chest as I thought about her, returning to Ben. “I’d never seen her before, she accidentally bumped into me and was just being friendly.” Ben glanced back at me and raised an eyebrow, “Just being friendly, huh?” “What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked, pushing him off the path. Ben laughed, his eyes having a lively, playful look to them. “I don't have crazy good hearing so I don't know what she said to make you do your flirty giggle but I’m sure it was something more than just friendly.” It was my turn to raise my eyebrows as I crossed my arms over my chest. “My flirty giggle?” Ben nodded, a giant grin spreading across his face. “Plus she was staring at you the whole time we were in there.” I blushed, quickly turning my face away but apparently not fast enough before Ben sees it and nudges my shoulder as we walk into the lodge. “Does someone have a little crush?” He asked and I glared, making sure my look was cold enough to get him to shut up. I don't need my older brother meddling in my love life. He held up his hands and smiled softly, “Hey, I wont get involved. But you should totally try and get her number. You two looked cute together.” He paused and I shook my head, letting my eyes fall to my feet. “Plus if you finally get a girlfriend you’ll stop trying to tag along with my plans so much.” And before I could glare again Ben ran over to our parents sitting on a sofa by the fire. I sighed, knowing I should join them but my heart thumped as thoughts of Sophia spiraled around in my head. It picked up to a blissful place to the point where I felt like I was floating. She was a beautiful mess that practically jumped into my arms and I couldn't get the interaction out of my head. The way her eyes darted around while the barista cleaned up between us and all we could do was stand there, helplessly drowning in our own silence. I needed that feeling back. I pulled out my phone, turning right back out the door and started to run back to the coffee shop. “You good, Lily?” Ben asks on the other side of the phone. “I left something at the coffee shop, tell mom and dad I’ll be back in a few.” I could feel Ben grinning through the phone as he said okay and hung up. I needed to see Sophia again. As I raced back to the coffee shop, my curls flew behind me, the fresh, winter air greeting me again. I was panting by the time I was enveloped by the warmth of the shop. As I glanced around the shop, I realized it was too late, she was gone. Feeling defeated, I left, dragging myself back out the door. This was my fault. I had let her get away. I started my way back to the lodge, staring as my boots made footprints in the snow. I wasn’t watching where I was going as usual and ran face first into someone's chest. “Sorry! I need to watch wher-.” Sophia.  

4:00 pm

Lily. Her cheeks were red from the cold, and her hair had become a tangled mess. She looked perfect. I slid off my jacket and wrapped it around her shivering body. Lily coughed out her words,  our noses just inches apart. “I- uh, I was looking for you. Although I’m kind of surprised I actually found you.” I smiled to myself. “Unbelievably enough, I was doing the same. I guess it’s fate that we found each other.” I watched as her eyes lit up, and her cheeks flushed with the perfect rosy red. She cleared her throat, inching back a few steps. “This is more awkward than I imagined it when I was running here.” She stopped, pursing her lips. “Could I have your phone number? Or your snap, anything works really,” She quickly added. Her cheeks grew redder the more she rambled on and I tried to hide my smile, in awe of how amazing the girl in front of me was. I handed her my phone and watched as she messed up typing her number, then struggled to figure out what to put for the name category. She settled on “lily” with a little heart next to it. She handed the phone back to me, and I slid it into my pocket. We stared at each other in silence. Our silence. I felt like I was in a dream, like it was all too good to be true. So I asked, “Are you real? Or am I dreaming, because this is something out of a movie.” She giggled, “I think I’m real,” she pinched herself  and smiled her contagious smile. I took her hand and wrapped her in a bear hug, my emotions overflowing. She tensed up at first, but slowly relaxed into my hold and I could feel her smiling into my sweat shirt. “Are you here on vacation or do you live here?” She asked, stepping back. I let my arms fall to my side, and tried to string a sentence together. “I’m actually working here for the winter, running the ski lifts and such. I’m actually staying at the Snow Lodge, just up the hill.” Lily’s lips formed an excited smile and she gasped, “no way, me too!” I felt the excitement rise in me and she started jumping up and down. Soon enough, we were just jumping and laughing together and I felt complete. It felt like my life that had started out as a bunch of scattered puzzle pieces had finally been finished. Lily was that last piece. We slowed down, our faces getting closer and closer. I held her gaze for what felt like forever. Her gaze dropped down from my eyes to my lips and I brushed my fingertips against hers. “Can I kiss you?” Her face lit up even more and her eyes fluttered as she nodded. I cupped my hands around her face and leaned in, feeling her melt against my lips. I pulled away and before she could step back I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her in for a hug. She squeezed me back tightly and I leaned down to her ear. “Thank you,” I whispered. She moved her head to look at me, studying my eyes. “For what?” “Being here. I know we kind of rushed this but everything feels right. Things have been dark, but you were the light, Lily. You were my light.” Lily grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze before breaking away, her phone vibrating in her pocket. She picked it up, still flustered as she talked to someone over the phone. She nodded a few times before hanging up and giving me a pouty look. “I have to go again, my parents want me back.” She rested her head on my shoulder, “I don't wanna go.” I tilted her chin towards me and smiled, “You won't have to wait long until we see each other again. Are you going skiing tomorrow? I’m working the ski lift.” “Yeah, I’ll try and catch you before you get too busy with work. Promise you’ll look out for me?” I smiled, shaking my head. “I don't think I’d be able to miss you.” A soft, sweet smile curved the corner of her rosy lips as she dropped my hand. “Bye, Sophia.” She said quietly and I tried to calm my racing heart as she started to walk the other way. “Goodbye Lily.”

January 21, 10:30 am

“Hello? Lily? Anyone in there?” I snapped out of my thoughts, bringing my attention back to my breakfast. “Are you thinking about your secret girlfriend?” Ben asked under his breath so our parents didn't hear. I already have Ben meddling in my love life, the last thing I need is my workaholic parents getting involved. And boy am I glad Ben understands that. I kicked him under the table, hissing at him. “You promised you’d stay out of it.” Ben nodded, pulling on one of his golden curls. “Fine, be that way. But you better snap out of whatever you’re going through long enough to last a few hours. If you’re this distracted on the slopes you’re gonna end up skiing right off a mountain top.” I chuckled and sighed. He was right, I would ski off a mountain top. We made our way to the lifts and I felt giddy excitement coming on as we got closer. Looking everywhere for her, my eyes finally land on her bright red hair. Glancing around at my family, I saw no one was paying any attention so I made my way over to her and wrapped my hands around her waist. She turned around and glowed when she saw me. She wrapped me into a hug and kissed my forehead. “Hi,” She whispered. “Ready to go on the ski lift with me?” “I can’t yet, my break isn't until 11:30.” Hearing my groan she quickly reassured me, “It’s okay, I can watch you go ski from the top.” She helped me sneak past the line and on to the first lift, “Okay, I’m going to go start the lift, and by the time you get back up I can go with you.” I smiled at her and nodded. I watched her as she started the lfit and I was soaring above the trees. I looked back and she blew me a kiss. Settling into my seat, I enjoyed the view and the fresh air in my lungs. The ski lift stopped and I hopped off. I started gaining momentum and I watched as the trees whizz past me. The crisp air whipped my curls all around my face, blocking my view. I felt my skis almost slide out from under me when I hit slick ice. I tried to regain my balance, panic swelling in my throat. I turned to the side, trying to stop myself but a sharp branch hanging down slashed across my face. I forced my eyes open, falling forward onto my knees and regained my awareness. I looked back, realizing I had gone off-piste. I took a deep breath in, lifting one of my gloved hands to my forehead where the branch had hit me, pretty sure it was bleeding. “You’re fine Lily. You’ll get back on the slopes, call for help and spend the rest of the day inside with Sophia.” I told myself, using a nearby branch to pull myself back onto my feet. I made my way back to the slopes. I started to see the ropes marking the trail peeking out.  Skiing faster and faster I’m feet away from merging onto the trail when I slam into a rock I hadn't noticed before. I cry out, falling over it as something else plows into my back. I fall to my side, curling into a ball as my entire body throbs. Someone calls my name but my vision is spotted with black dots until it entirely fades out and everything goes black. 

11:45 am

As I wait for Lily to finish the course, I busy myself with things in the operating booth. I look up to watch her ski, she looks so graceful, and free. I continue to watch when she suddenly strays off-piste, disappearing into the woods. Panicking, my eyes darted back and forth watching for her to come back. She merges onto the path, falling over a boulder and rams into an on-coming skier. She drops to the ground, lifeless and frozen. I rushed to call the toboggan, fear causing sweat to drip down my brow. I began pacing around the booth, the EMT’s couldn't arrive fast enough. When they finally did I rushed to see her stretched out on toboggan. Her face was cold and hard, like it was frozen in fear. I wanted to reach out, try to comfort her, keep her warm, do something other than standing there helplessly. The skier Lily had run into hurries over and not until he got super close did I realize it’s her brother I had seen a few other times. He tried to run closer to Lily but one of the EMT’s advised him to stay back. He paced back and forth as they took her away, throwing his gloves and helmet to the side as well as his skis and poles. “I don't know what to do. I need to do something.” He said over and over. Finally he turned to me and looked me up and down, cocking his head. “You look familiar,” He said slowly, stepping closer. “Lily and I have talked a few times, I ran into her at the cafe.” He raised his eyebrows, momentarily stopping his nerves about Lily. “Oh, so you’re her secret girlfriend she wont stop simping over?” “She told you?” “No, I’m just really nosy.” Silence fell over us and Ben tapped his foot nervously. “Do you have a car? My parents took the one we bought but I need some way to get to the hospital.” I nodded and Ben followed me back to the lodge parking lot. We made our way to my car, and drove in silence. We arrived at the hospital to find Lily passed out in a bed, with a black eye. She slept the entire night, Ben and I sitting next to her bed, overtaken by nerves. We tried to make small talk but with an injured Lily in front of us it was hard to focus on anything. I think I dozed off eventually around 4 in the morning because when I opened my eyes a few hours later Ben was gone with a note on his chair saying he had gone to get food. I moved my chair closer to Lily’s bed and layed my hand over hers, praying she would wake up soon. Finally her eyes fluttered open, and even in her worst state of being in the hospital she was as beautiful as ever. 

January 22, 8:38 am

Her. I had known she was special the minute we locked eyes. Her fiery red hair falling over her eyes as she reached down to pick up the cups off the floor. And now, her round, glittering, hazel eyes staring down at me filled with care and worry. Her dark, fine lips curved into a giant grin and she dipped down to kiss my forehead. Everything about her was perfectly imperfect. That’s how we were together. Imperfect. That’s how I liked it. With her I didn't have to worry about who I had to be or who was better than me. It was just us. The rush of the world stopped spinning around us and we had a few moments alone, in our own special silence. I hoped that’s how it would be for the rest of eternity. Just us, in our perfectly imperfect mess.