Walter, Eddie, and the Crocodile Monster

Submitted into Contest #235 in response to: Write a story that includes someone saying, “You can’t run forever.”... view prompt

10 comments

Fiction Kids

Walter came crashing through the back door. He zipped into the playroom and dumped out a bin of costumes. Frantic, he dug through the clothing, and gave a sigh of relief when he found what he was looking for. 

Walter slid a red superhero mask over his eyes, then threw a red and yellow cape around his neck.  He fumbled  with the velcro. In his rush, he struggled to get it to stick.

“Ugh! Why won’t this stay?” Walter grumbled.

“Slow down and focus, Buddy,” his mom, who was reading a book on the couch, reminded him.

“Mom, I have to run. I need to do it fast!” he insisted.

He stomped his foot and tried again. Walter smashed the two velcro pieces together, and when he saw that they were holding, he flew out the door.

“Eddie! Let’s run!” Walter urged his twin brother.

Eddie hopped down from the big dome climber. He trailed behind as Walter led him from one end of the backyard to the other.

“Walter? Why are we running?” Eddie wanted to know.

His face was red, and beads of sweat were starting to form at his temples.

“Because there’s a monster. It’s a crocodile monster. With a super long tail. Run, fastly!” Walter exclaimed.

Eddie, huffing and puffing, did his best to keep up. Walter guided him around the perimeter of the fence, and eventually lapped him.

“I think the crocodile monster is gone now,” Eddie said.

In his hopefulness, he slowed to a fast walk.

“No, it’s not. Run faster, or it will get us!” Walter cried.

“Can’t we just hide from it?” Eddie asked.

“Running is the only way to get away,” Walter informed him, as he passed his brother once again.

“But I’m not as fast as you. I can’t keep running,” Eddie pointed out.

Walter began to zigzag across the yard.

“You have to use your legs. Only move your legs and you will go fast,” Walter promised.

“But I am tired. I don’t think I want to play this anymore,” Eddie admitted. 

He sat down on a stump and tried to catch his breath.

“I never get tired,” Walter boasted.

“But Walter, I am tired, and you can’t run forever. You will get hungry, and your feet will hurt,” Eddie argued.

“My feet will never hurt because I am really strong,” Walter told him.

Though the boys were twins, they were as different as could be. Walter was physically smaller than Eddie, but he was bigger in every other sense. He was louder, stronger, messier, and faster. 

Walter had grand ideas, made elaborate plans, and took big risks, with confidence. Eddie was quiet, and always played by the rules. He waited to be told what to do, and was often praised for his ability to do as he was told. He was the preferred brother in every classroom and sports team the boys had ever been on together.

The backyard was the one area where Walter got to shine. He loved to play outside, because he could fully be himself. He could be loud, and move in big ways, without being punished for it. 

Walter felt powerful when he was running, climbing, or fighting imaginary bad guys. When Walter was playing, he finally had an advantage over his brother. It was almost like he couldn’t help creating play scenarios that showcased the way his physical abilities were above Eddie’s.

Walter looked back and saw that Eddie was hunched over on the stump, looking at the ground. He had a stick  in one hand, and he used it to dig in the dirt.

“Yeah! Eddie! Get your sword! We have to fight the crocodile monster!” Walter exclaimed.

He ran to the wood pile and pulled out his own stick. It was longer than his arm. He started to swing it around, hoping to strike the imaginary creature.

“Eddie! Help me!” Walter cried.

Eddie jumped up with his stick that instantly became a sword. He was cautious as he made his way over to Walter. He copied the way his brother was swinging his weapon at the monster. Eddie’s efforts were halfhearted at first, but his enthusiasm increased with each swat.

“Eddie, I’ll distract him while you run!” Walter instructed his brother.

“Get him, Walter!” Eddie shouted.

Walter swung his sword, spinning and darting until he finally struck the creature. Eddie ran to the dome climber and crawled to the top.

“I got him!” Walter cried.

His celebration only lasted a moment.

“Oh no, that made him angry! Eddie, we have to run again!” Walter cried.

“No, I’m not running. The monster can’t get me when I’m way up here,” Eddie argued.

“He can! The crocodile monster’s long tail can reach really high!” Walter warned his brother.

“Walter, since you like to run, how about you keep running. Since I don’t like to run, I’ll do something else,” Eddie suggested.

Walter took a moment to consider Eddie’s proposal.

“Yes. You go to the mud kitchen and make a poisoned treat for the monster. I will keep running away,” he  agreed.

Eddie got busy filling a bowl with dirt. He added chalk dust, rocks, water from the hose, and poisoned acorns to his concoction. Walter continued to sprint all around the yard. He narrowly escaped the jaws and tail of the crocodile monster on several occasions.

“Walter, the poison food is done. Feed it to the monster!” Eddie called to his brother.

Walter dashed over to Eddie and grabbed the bowl. The poisoned treat resembled bubbling brownie batter. Walter almost wanted to have a taste himself. 

He set the bowl down in the middle of the yard, and ran for safety. The boys cheered as the crocodile monster started eating the treat. As soon as it had consumed the whole bowl, the monster shriveled up and disappeared, long tail and all.

“Eddie, should WE go inside and have a treat?” Walter wondered.

“Yes,” Eddie replied.

“I’ll race you to the door!” Walter shouted.

He took off running, leaving Eddie in the dust.

February 02, 2024 03:18

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10 comments

Aaron Bowen
14:42 Feb 05, 2024

You pulled off the transition into imagination smoothly enough that the crocodile monster, on some level, actually registers as a threat. Maybe its because you clearly communicate your protagonist's need to please his brother? In any event, being able to create a conflict that doesn't actually exist is impressive.

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Ty Warmbrodt
02:03 Feb 05, 2024

I'm 47 and still fighting crocodile monsters. Fun story, Chelsey. Took me back to my youth.

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Alexis Araneta
15:28 Feb 04, 2024

As usual, a very imaginative take on the prompt. Lovely job !

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Chelsey B
15:55 Feb 04, 2024

Thank you.

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13:58 Feb 04, 2024

That was fun to read! Reminded me of being a kid.

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David Sweet
17:52 Feb 03, 2024

A fun story! Kids do love to run. It seems they run everywhere they go because life can't catch them fast enough. Too bad many of us lose that love to stay a step ahead of life (and any crocodile monsters) that creep into our daily lives! Thanks for sharing.

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Christy Morgan
03:47 Feb 03, 2024

I have twins - you captured it, Chelsey!

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03:25 Feb 03, 2024

Cute story. Yes. Twins are different in temperament and personality.

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John Rutherford
12:54 Feb 02, 2024

This is imaginative stuff, very good.

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Mary Bendickson
05:30 Feb 02, 2024

Child's play. You made it look easy.

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