A Flavour of Kintsugi

"Ew, put that back."

Shay opened her mouth, an argument at the tip of her tongue: You haven't even looked! But it died in her throat as she locked eyes with Iris in the mirror she hadn't before noticed. So she resigned to pout instead.

"Hey!" she said. "It's cute!"

"Yeah, if you're a hobo, maybe."

Shay draped the leopard-print coat over her arm and admitted defeat. "You're rude."

"I'm trying to make sure you don't look like a rug."

"You look like a rug," Shay muttered, hanging the coat back up on the rack with a rueful sigh. "I knew I shouldn't have brought you."

"What, so you can show up to class looking like Cruella DeVille again?" Iris asked, pushing herself up off of the bench and putting her phone in her back pocket. Shay stuck her tongue out as Iris started to sift through the copious amounts of coats. Her face became sourer the longer she did so. "Jeez, do any of these not stink?!"

"Why are you such a bully?" Shay asked.

"Why do you shop here?" Iris asked, gesturing to the high ceilings and lifeless grey walls of the second-hand store. "Everything's stained and smells like broken dreams."

Shay turned back to the coat rack, thumbing over a well-worn leather jacket. She had to look away so Iris didn't see the hurt in her eyes.

After a few moments of awkward silence between them, Iris sighed and continued to search.

Shay ran her palm over a corduroy coat. For a Saturday, the store was sparsely populated, much to Iris' initial shock. Shay swore that was when her friend had made up her mind about this place.

Well, that and the fact that Shay refused to shop anywhere else, despite Iris promising to pay if they could just go to the Banana Republic or le Chateau.

It wasn't like Shay didn't have the money to buy new things; she worked part-time at a nearby grocery store and was responsible with her spending. She didn't even need a new coat, but collecting old clothes was something of an obsession of hers.

She never minded hand-me-downs from her older cousins. She wore her Mom's winter jacket until all of its seams were ripped, not because she wanted to be like them, but because she felt like wearing them was a way of remembering. The stain on her white shirt was from summer camp, where they made slime and she had accidentally got green food colouring on herself. Shay and her friends decided to say that it was snot, and it was putrid green because she ate too much broccoli.

Was it a stupid thing to do? Sure. Did the memory make her laugh? Of course.

That fascination with the memories imprinted onto clothes extended to second-hand things. Everything there had been discarded by their previous owners; it was too big, too small, not quite fashionable enough, or no longer used. Shay liked to make up stories about the scuffs and tears, imagining that the sleeve of that shirt was torn because their ex-lover yanked on it too harshly. Or that the laces of those shoes had been chewed on by the most adorable puppy in the world.

Then there were the clothes that were hardly worn; she liked to think that she was finishing their story by wearing them until she couldn't anymore. Like that Cruella DeVille coat, as Iris had called it. Hardly worn, sad and hanging forgotten on the rack, Shay simply had to bring it home, lest no one else did. That is until Iris had forced her to return it in exchange for store credit.

At least it wasn't on the rack anymore. Hopefully, someone else bought it.

Shay took a closer look at the corduroy coat. It actually had a patchwork sleeve, which instantly caught her interest.

She liked the dull blue colour - it reminded her of dragonfly wings.

Shay stood on her tiptoes to check on Iris. She was over on the far side of the rack, batting away coats as if they were insects as she sifted through them. At least she had moved farther away.

Without judging eyes, Shay allowed herself to trace the patchwork. Upon further inspection, she could see that there were different colour stitches in the colour, and even an out-of-place zipper on one of the pockets.

It was tricky to unzip - rust and time had worn down the tracks. That and it was caught on something.

After more tugging, she managed to get it open and free the piece of paper that was lying within, as if waiting for her. She pulled it out.

"What about this?" Iris asked, snapping Shay out of her thoughts. She crumpled the paper in her fist and jumped away from the jacket. Iris was holding up a brand new trench coat. It was long and beige and looked exactly like one that Iris already owned.

"It's..." Shay tried for a smile. "It's nice!"

"We can be twinsies!" Iris said, smiling for the first time since they entered the store. "You'll look so cute in it! Here, try it on!"

Shay did as she was told, slipping her arms through the sleeves and grimacing as the shoulders fit far too snugly around her shoulders. Iris did up the buttons, ignoring the hesitance in Shay's expression. When she stepped back, her smile widened.

"You're so pretty, Shay," Iris said, looking her up and down with an approving nod that faltered only slightly when they reached her feet. "Maybe on the way back, we can stop by and get you some shoes, too."

Shay frowned and looked down at her sparkly combat boots. The tongue on her right foot had a chunk taken out of it (by dangerous hyena attack, Shay imagined) and the soles were a little worn, but they were comfy!

"I like these shoes," Shay said.

"Shay, you look like you stomped on a clown and got its glittery blood all over you," Iris said, her voice lilting as if she was making a joke and not seriously hurting Shay's feelings. "Like the boots themselves look nice on you, and I think you like that chunky angular look, anywho."

Shay felt like an idiot standing there with her glittery shoes and a too-small coat. She felt like the worst mannequin in the world.

Iris was craning her neck towards the exit. "Come on, we should go and check out."

Shay glanced over her shoulder warily, then chewed her lip. "Uh, sure. But I think I left my phone over by the purses, could you go check?"

Iris shook her head. "How did you not notice your phone was gone?! God, Shay, what am I gonna do with you?"

"I'm an idiot, I guess," Shay said with a pinned-on smile.

"Oh, I know," Iris said, then gave her a departing wave and made for the shoe section. Shay waited until she ducked into an aisle before yanking the trench coat off of her body and hanging it back on the shelf.

She moved back towards the corduroy jacket while unfurling her fist. The neatly folded piece of paper was dense and took a little while to flatten it out. The paper was crumpled, but she could still read what was written through the craggy surface:

July Seventh - I was playing hide and seek tag with Donny and I got caught on a branch. Rip from my elbow to my wrist. Ow.

Shay couldn't believe what she was reading, but she also couldn't stop.

May Twenty-Third - My hood caught on fire and they had to take it out, so I made a new, improved black one. My hair also caught on fire, FYI. Not cool.

A detailed account of everything that had happened to the jacket? That had both sides totally filled out? Shay couldn't stop herself from smiling if she tried.

February Thirty-First (February only having thirty days is fake, by the way) - Donny tried to steal my gum from my pocket and broke the zipper! That little-

"I couldn't find it," Iris said, once again startling Shay. She craned her neck to read the paper, but Shay quickly began re-folding it. "What's that?" Then, after looking around: "Where's the jacket?"

"Right here," Shay said, pulling the corduroy jacket off of the rack and hugging it tight to her chest. Iris was confused. "I'm getting this one."

"What?" Iris asked, sizing up the coat in her arms and frowning. "Why?"

"Because I like it," Shay said simply, turning around and marching towards the checkout.

"What's with you?" Iris asked, laughing because she didn't know what to say. "That's such an ugly shade of blue."

"No it isn't!" Shay shouted, spinning on her heel and letting all of her pent up frustration out all at once. Iris blinked and sat back on her heels, stunned. "It's fine! It's more than fine; I think it's great. And I'm buying it, so ... so there."

Iris raised her hands defensively. "I'm just trying to help, Shay, you-"

"Yeah, well," Shay said, her face going red. "I didn't ask."

Iris scowled. Her tone immediately became biting. "Oh what, you're gonna yell at me because I don't want you to get bullied at school? Get over yourself-"

"No," Shay said, stumbling over her words. Her heart was hammering in her ears. "Y-you get over yourself."

She didn't have anything else to say, so she turned back around and made a beeline to the checkout. The clerk looked hesitant.

"Everything okay, Shay?" he asked, taking the coat from her shaking hands. A few seconds later, Iris stormed out of the store and slammed the door shut behind her. There went Shay's ride home. Oh well, that just meant she wouldn't have to wait before reading more about that corduroy jacket.

"Yeah," she said, quickly paying and hurrying from the store. To distract herself from the guilt twisting in her chest caused by yelling at Iris, she pulled out the paper and read a random annotation, but her eyes drifted down to the very bottom.

October fifth - Well, I haven't worn this thing in a long time. No point in keeping it, so I give this as a (sorta) gift to you, dear reader and/or future owner: make some new memories for me. Adios.

~Eliza

Shay reached into her shopping bag and pulled the jacket out. Without hesitation, she slung it over her shoulders and slipped her arms through the sleeves. It fit snug, but not too tightly.

The walk home was long, but not unpleasant; she had Eliza to keep her company.