Surprises and Sadness

Surprises And Sadness

“ Hi mom, it’s me… Kaitlyn.” I held her hand.

“ Hi Katelyn.” 

“ Mom…”

“ Yes honey?”

“ You know you can call me Katie.”

“ Yeah.”

“ Mom….” 

Mom starts to cry.

 “ Mom, why have you been gone for a few days?”

“ Katie, Darling.” 

“ But mom, I missed you.” Going on the verge of tears.

“ Honey, you know you have your Aunt to take care of you while I’m gone.”

“ I know, but when are you going to come back home?”

“ I might not…”

“ What do you mean you're not?”

“ Mom, I missed you a lot. You’ve been gone for a week.”

“ I’m sorry. I have something important to tell you.”

“ Mom, I love you.”

“ I love you to Katie.”

“ Please come home.”

“ I’m sorry.”

I  went across the room.

“ Anything new doc?”

“ You might not wanna know.”

“ Tell me please.”

“ Don’t tell her, I’ll tell her.” She sits up.”

“ Okay, I’ll let you two have your time.”

“ Thank you doctor.”

“ I got…”

“ You got what?”

“ Cancer.” 

“ What kind?”

“ Lung cancer, stage 4.”

“ Oh my god, is this the end?” I covered my mouth in panic.

“ They are going to unplug my life support from me today...” She coughed.

“ Mom, I’m staying.”

“ No , it’s too late. They unplugged me and I only have a few minutes.” She coughed

“ To live?”

“ Yes…”

“ MOM I AM STAYING.”

“ Just remember this… I’ll always be with you.” 

“ No… I’m not letting you die without saying goodbye.”

“ I’m so sorry honey.” She rubbed my back, “ I should’ve told you earlier. But I just didn’t want you to know.”

“ Why?”

“ Because I didn't want you to know even though it’s too late. I’m sorry. I love you.” She wiped my tears from my cheek.

“ I love you too mom, please don’t go.”

“ Goodbye Katie.”

“ No mom. Don’t go! Mom!?!?!” I start screaming/crying.

*Knock knock*

“ Come in.” I whip my tears.

“ I’m sorry hun, I’m so sorry for your loss. She’s in a better place now. I know she loves you very much and will always be with you.”

“ I love her too.”

“ She knows hun.”

“ I have to go.”

“ Of course, your aunt is right outside.” She escorted me to the lobby and my aunt started crying and hugged me.

The rest of the night I stayed in my room and had snacks in my room to calm me down. I put the song: Just say you won’t let go By James Arthur to put me in my feelings and let out a good cry.

‘Dear Mom, I know you're not here but just know how much I love you. You're in a better place and when I die, I’ll be able to see you.I lie in bed with tears running down my face, I won't lie, I miss you each day of my life. Funny, how you always spoke of death and that you were preparing me for that day you would leave and never return. ... Honestly I didn't think it would be that soon.’

The next morning, I said ‘Good Morning’ to my mom and headed downstairs.

“ Good morning Katie!”

“ Good morning aunt Josie.”

“ Awe, why the sad face?” She asked.

“ I just can’t believe mom died last night.”

“ I know, I miss her. But put that sadness away because I cooked chocolate chip pancakes”. She had a sing song voice.

As we ate, we told funny stories about mom and her in their childhood and made each other laugh.

“ You better go outside.”

“ Why?”

“ ‘Cause your boyfriend is honking for you. Now here’s your lunch, do you have your books?”

“ Yes.”

“ Binder?”

I looked in my backpack. “ Yes.”

“ Here’s a card for your birthday, after school you have to get changed for your birthday, okay?”

“ Got it, can I invite my friends?”

“ Your mom would want the whole school to be there.” She giggled.

“ Okay, bye.”

“ Hello birthday girl.” Jake kissed me.

“ Hi, you look extra jittery today. Did something happen?” I teased him.

“ Very funny.”

“ It’s ok baby.”

When I got to school, all of my friends wished me a ' Happy Birthday’ which made me sad because I won’t be coming home to mom.

“ Hey Katie.”

“ Hey, what’s up?”

“ Why were you sad today?”

“ Don’t worry about it, I’m fine.” I forced a smile.

“ Put that smile away and tell me what’s going on.” 

“ Alex, I just don’t feel like talking about it okay?” I raised my voice a little but everyone heard it.

 And it made my boyfriend come running after me.

“ Katie!?”

“ Why are you crying?” Jake asked.

“ I just miss her.” I cried.

“ Miss who?” 

“ My mom…”

“ Oh, what happened?”

“ Last night I found out my mom had lung cancer...” A tear rolled down my cheek. “ And died just last night.”

“ That’s horrible, I’m sorry.”

“ It’s fine, it’s not your mom.” I sniffed.

“ I know, but I don’t want a sad girlfriend so  let’s cheer you up.” He hugged me.

“ What are we going to do?”

“ I’m going to make you happy by  getting coffee and cookies before your next classes and do a little bit exploring in the mall.”

“ Jake, are you sure what you're doing? Because when I go to the mall, I shop and you might not like it.”

“ I might find something. These are the things you like and I want you to be happy again” He reassured me.

“ Okay.”

He held my hand and we went to his care which was a Mercedes.

“ So, Jake…”

“ Yeah?”

“ My aunt Josephine wants to throw a party for me at my house. And you're invited if you want to come.”

“ Of course! I wouldn’t miss your 18th birthday party. Who’se all going to be there?”

“ Alex, Maggie, Jane, Camilla, Lori, Brianna, Tara, and Ally. If it’s okay with you.”

“ Katie, it’s your party. You don’t have to ask me for permission.”

“ But you're my boyfriend and I don’t want to cause a problem.”

“ Babe, it’s cool.”

“ Oh, and you have to be on your best behavior.” I teased him.

“ I will, I promise.”

“ Okay.”

As we got to the drive through of Starbucks, I ordered an Iced coffee with a cake pop which I was so excited about because I heard that they're so good.

“ Can I help you?” Asked a woman with a gentle voice over the speaker system.

“ Um, can my girlfriend have Iced coffee with a cake pop?”

“ Of course you can, Anything for you sir?”

“ Can I have a Croissant?”

“ Ok, it’s going to be $3.83 at the window.”

“ Here’s your iced coffee, cake pop, and croissant.” She handed it to Jake.

We drove for about 15 minutes to the mall which is in Portland where all the good stores are. Jake parked his car to the closest parking spot to the mall which was surprising because the Portland mall is always busy or that we were just lucky.

“ So, what store do you want to go to first?”

“ Easy food court.”

“ But you just ate.”

“ I know, but I got to eat all my feelings.”

Jake took a deep breath and said, “ Ok, fine. What do you feel like eating?”

“ I’ll look when I get there, 'cmon.”

As we got into the mall, the mall was unexpectedly packed but not really packed.

“ Ok, here’s the food court. What do I want to eat.”

“ I’ll pay.”

“ Katie, it’s your birthday. You can’t pay for food on your birthday.”

“ Thanks, I want ice cream.”

“ That’s it?”

“ Yeah.”

“ Ok, here you go.”

“ Thank you!”

“ You're welcome, I put it in a cup because I thought you wanted to shop with the ice cream.”

“ Jake, this IS what I wanted.”

“ Ok, now where do you want to go?”

“ Hot Topic.”

“ Ok.”

“ So, what are we looking for?”

“ Just ripped jeans and a graphic T.”

“ Ok.”

“ Need a bag?” Asked an assistant.

“ No thank you.”

We walked around the mall for 20 minutes which gave me enough time to get to class afterward.

“ Have fun?”

“ Yeah.”

“ Did you?”

“ Don’t worry, I had fun making my girlfriend happy.”

“ Awe.” I kissed him and we drove back to school.

“ Hey, Katie?”

“ Yes?”

“ I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for making you mad earlier.”

“ It’s okay, I just had a bad day and just needed to cool off.”

“ Phew, so we’re good?”

“ We’re good.”

After school I had the best party ever, ice cream cake, lots of people, fairy lights, tables and chairs, etc. And this party was so exciting and romantic which was the theme I was looking for. Even though my mom isn’t here, I know she’s looking down on me right now.”