The Will of Her Will

Ruth was a bitter woman - strong and determined - with a strong will… Though shrew, she appeared to be calm, mature, and collected. She was an African-American woman. She was proud and confident. But, still, she was bitter. Ruth had what most women dreamed of. She would have a husband, three children (girls), and a house (with a white picket fence.) Okay - maybe, there was no white picket fence. But, still, there was a house.

Ruth was born in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. She had five siblings - four brothers and one sister. Her parents migrated to Philadelphia from the South. When she was a teenager, her parents moved her and her siblings from Philadelphia to Newark, New Jersey. And this is where her story begins… This is where Ruth begins to make decisions that will affect everyone around her.

It all started with the Will. Both of Ruth’s parents died from cancer. Each fighting for their life, and one dying right after the other. However, Ruth, decided to tell everyone that her parents died in a car crash. There was a settlement involved and she would become the beneficiary. Ruth was the eldest girl, but not the eldest child. Three of her brothers were born before her.

But, still, Ruth found a way to change her parent’s Will. It was her wish... Her will… And it would be her way… And so Ruth went on to destroy anyone who got in her way. She was determined to reap all of the benefits and rights thereof - as would be specified in the new Will. When the Will was read, mouths fell open. Lips quivered. Hands and feet shook. But, still, no one said a word.

And so life went on… Ruth met another man and divorced her first husband - the father of two of her three daughters. Only one person knew the father of her third daughter. Ruth married the next man. She moved out of the projects in Newark. Her new husband bought her a nice house and helped raise her three daughters. She was living the life she had always dreamed about. And only her siblings would know her secrets.

Ruth’s brothers (the three older ones) became drug addicts and alcoholics, like her first husband. Ruth didn’t take kindly to them and kept them at a distance. Ruth was much closer to her younger brother and sister. But, still, she kept them at arm’s length. Unlike her older siblings, her younger brother and sister were invited to family outings. They shared in each other’s lives, all while living a lie.

Ruth’s one and only sister had been threatened by her and was deathly afraid of her. Her younger brother and sister would soon marry their partners and have children of their own. They lived separate lives, but came together as a family - during holidays. Ruth’s two youngest daughters each gave birth - causing Ruth to become a grandmother. All of the grandchildren were born out of wedlock, which was unpleasing to Ruth.

In the public eye, Ruth bragged and boasted - putting up a good front. Behind closed doors, she showed discontentment and disdain. But, still, Ruth, was revered as the matriarch of the family. She had a very strange relationship with her eldest grandchild. Maybe, it was because she had been estranged from her own child - her middle daughter. This middle child would become a thorn in Ruth’s side.

She became a drug addict and alcoholic, like Ruth’s first husband and three eldest brothers. She would go on to destroy her life and everyone who got in her way. She too showed discontentment and disdain for her own daughter - her only daughter - her only child. But for different reasons… As life went on, and the hatred between Ruth and her middle daughter grew, so did the hatred between Ruth and her eldest granddaughter.

Before long, Ruth’s eldest granddaughter became pregnant. She too had given birth at an early age. However, unlike her grandmother and her mother, the eldest granddaughter gave birth to a son. She then went on to graduate from college and became successful. The eldest granddaughter also became very close to her great-aunt (her grandmother’s younger sister.)

As time went on, Ruth’s secrets and lies began to unfold. The granddaughter learned about the Will. She learned all about the properties, stores, houses, monies - and all the things that should have been willed to her great-aunt and great-uncles. Her grandmother had been deceitful. It was shameful. But, still, she was her grandmother - and these things happened way before she was born.

As the eldest granddaughter’s mother became ill, and her youngest aunt succumbed to drugs, her grandfather and eldest aunt were also taken away from her. Though she learned that he was not her biological grandfather, she loved him as her grandfather (nonetheless.) He was the only man she had known as a father. When he passed away, everyone knew that Ruth’s eldest daughter would become the executor of her Will. But, when she too passed away, Ruth had no one else to turn to.

Ruth couldn’t turn to her sister and brothers because she had treated them badly. She couldn’t turn to her middle daughter because she was a drug addict. She couldn’t turn to her youngest daughter (and not because she too was a drug addict…) But because she too learned that her mother was deceitful. She too learned of the shameful things her mother had done. And she too learned that the only man she knew as a father was not her biological father.

Eventually, all of Ruth’s siblings died. Left with no one else to turn to, Ruth turned to her eldest grandchild - the granddaughter whom she had shown so much disdain toward. So much contempt… But, now, still - Ruth needed her. She needed her to become the executor of her Will. And that’s when the eldest granddaughter learned all about the properties, stores, houses, monies - and all the things that should have been willed to her mother and youngest aunt.

Instead, everything - all of Ruth’s worldly possessions would belong to the eldest granddaughter and her son. Ruth had made it very clear that she did not want anything to go to her younger grandchildren. She explained that this was because the youngest granddaughter had given birth to “too many children out of wedlock” and her brother “was a drug addict, who had dropped out of school in the sixth grade.”

It was like the pot calling the kettle black… The number of school dropouts… The number of drug addicts… The number of people in the family who had been held to the cross and crucified by Ruth… But, still, there was the eldest granddaughter - who had risen above her grandmother’s criticisms. And, for this, she would inherit everything. She would take her rightful place on the “throne”, when her grandmother bequeathed her to do so.

Then, something changed… Life had taken a turn and things went awry… Everything was different… There was someone else sitting on the “throne” - someone else would benefit from Ruth’s treachery. When her eldest and favorite daughter passed away, Ruth wanted her eldest granddaughter to come and live with her. Unbeknownst to the eldest granddaughter, this was a stipulation of the Will.

It had not been written, but (in Ruth’s mind) it was “understood” that the eldest granddaughter would pack up her son and all of her belongings and worldly possessions (and move in with her grandmother.) When Ruth, found out that her eldest granddaughter had no intention of doing so, she flew into a rage. Once, again, she began to destroy everything in her path and everyone who got in her way.

When the eldest granddaughter’s son became ill, Ruth was not there for her… She was not there to support her the way a grandmother should. When the eldest granddaughter’s mother passed away, Ruth was not there for her… She was not there to support her the way a grandmother should. But, still, the eldest granddaughter would remain loyal to her grandmother - and would always be there to support her whenever she needed - in a way that a granddaughter should.

Now, Ruth would become ill and die. But, she had done something so awful and so unforgiving that she and her eldest granddaughter had not spoken in over fifteen years. Though the eldest granddaughter was not there in the flesh, she was there in spirit. Her son had called and asked her how to go about changing the conditions of the Will. He too would learn all about the properties, stores, houses, monies - and all the things that should have been willed to his mother.

Several months after Ruth’s death, the eldest granddaughter learned that the Will had been changed - again. The eldest granddaughter expected her son to become the sole beneficiary (although he too had been dabbling in drugs and had dropped out of school.) She suspected that Ruth’s youngest daughter (and only living daughter) would not act as an executor of the Will.

The thing that was surprising was that Ruth’s youngest granddaughter (the one with “too many children born out of wedlock”) had become one of the beneficiaries. The eldest granddaughter was not present for the reading of the Will. But, she obtained a copy… She learned that all the properties, stores, houses, monies - and all the things that should have been willed to her son - were also bequeathed to her younger cousins.

At the bottom of the Will, there was a handwritten note with Ruth’s signature. The eldest granddaughter read the note aloud in her grandmother’s calm, mature, collected - yet bitter and shrewd tone: “The purpose of this note is not intended to hurt anyone, but I do not wish for my eldest granddaughter and youngest daughter to get anything.” That is what my grandmother, Ruth, willed in her Will.