Frist Kiss

I live in the very small town of Riverbend and one great thing about growning up in a small town, is I consider myself one of the lucky ones.

I have never known what its like to have fancy clothes or expensive things. My wardrobe consisted of cutoff jeans and tank tops, and shoes were optional. I have the whole outside as my playground and the freedom to roam without the fear of being hurt or kidnapped because everyone knows who I am and where I was supposed to be. Which makes getting into trouble challenging, but like any child that grows up in a small town in the south, I know how to get into trouble. Challenge accepted. 

Being the second oldest of three children, as the middle child, I am often forgotten or overlooked. This didn't bother me in the least. It just means that I can get away with more. 

My sister Amber, is two years older, which she reminds me of over and over again. It is a diatribe of "You have to listen to me because I am older than you..." At which point I would stop listening to anything she had to say. 

We are a comparison of opposites'. She is all grace and refinement. Every dark blonde hair in place, with outfits that brought out the sparkle in her cornflower blue eyes. I am awkward, clumsy and my dark blonde hair is always a mess, my green eyes didn't sparkle unless I was laughing, which I do often. We are often told that we looked just like our mamma and were going to grow up pretty. How does one grow up pretty? I am still trying to figure that one out. 

On the other hand my brother Jackson is two years younger, than my advanced 13 years and to me, he is just a bothersome nuisance that my parents had, only to irritate me.

He didn't look like my sister and I, at all. He is all dark and brooding with amazing blue eyes and dark brown curly hair. He is tall for an 11 year old and the adults would often say that he was going to be a heartbreaker when he grew up. I don't know what that means and I feel bad for him. It would be awful to be the one that broke hearts because you got older. Adults say the strangest things. 

I often come up with creative ways to leave him behind, so I can hang out with my cousin Jeff and of course his best friend Cole.

Being 13, I had better things to do than keep an eye on my little brother. So this task is left, on many occasion, to my older sister. Which would irritate her, which in turn would irritate my brother.

I, however, would just smile to myself because, I effectively irritated both siblings by one action. If anything, I am efficient in my lack of responsibility. 

My cousins best friend Cole, is my crush and I am younger than him by three years, and in my mind he always seems so much older, and wiser than any of the others he hangs around with. Yes including my cousin Jeff. I really started to see him differently when I turned thirteen. I havev hit my "I like boys" faze and I often find myself dreaming about his chocolate brown hair, that is always just a bit too long. 

My hands just itch to touch it. I just know that it will be soft as silk. His eyes are the color of blue that reminds me of summer skies. When he looks at me, my insides just go to mush. I love the sound of his voice, it's deep, almost melodic and every word he says, just washs over me like, ripples on a calm lake. My thirteen year old heart is in love. 

I have tried so many times to get him to see me as more than just a kid, but to no avail. I am still just the kid who follows him around no matter what I say or do. 

I had almost given up hopen of him really seeing me when the prefect opportunity presented itself, my sister Amber is turning sixteen and she is having a huge sweet sixteen party. For the first time our parents are allowing boys to be invited. This is my big chance to nab me my man. 

I just had to get him alone. For this to work I needed my sister to invite Cole, only problem was, she and Cole didn't see eye to eye on about, well, anything. All because of a little misunderstanding with a snake and a frog, that happened to end up in her backpack at school a few years ago. It's not my fault that she's such a girl and can't take a joke. 

I begged and pleaded with my sister to invite Cole. She told me no, every time I have asked. Not one it be detoured easily, I kept on asking, and begging her until she finally gave in, but only after I promised to do her chores for the next week. She reluctantly invited him and I put my plans into action. Cole was going to be my first kiss, he just didn't know it. 

After much thought and deliberation, I felt that my plan was fool proof and ready to be executed. I was ready for anything and no one was going to stop me from getting that kiss from him. I had worked out every detail, well as much detail as my thirteen year old mind could come up with. 

The day of the party I was on pins and needles. Every time the door would open my heart would pick up speed, the anticipation was killing me. I kept pacing and looking out the window. Finally I saw his beat up white Chevy pickup coming up the long dirt drive and park. When he got out of his truck, looking dangerous and sexy in his cowboy hat and tight fitting jeans, I nearly fainted. 

He had on a simple light blue western button up shirt, with the first few buttons undone. Just looking at him made my heart go into overdrive. I let him in and he ruffled my hair and said "Hey kiddo" I ground my teeth and balled up my fist. I hated when he did that. I really wanted to just punch him but I took a deep breath and unclenched my fists and smiled brightly at him. 

I know, or at least I hoped, I was looking my best. I have my long blond hair curled and gently flowing down my back in soft waves. I was cursed with board straight hair that would only end up wavy no matter how much I curled it, but I curled it none the less.

My new jeans were a little tight but I thought it showed off my butt to a good advantage. I have on my favorite sky blue sweater, it hugs my small frame and made what little breasts I have, seem much fuller. 

Don't tell anyone but I am secretly proud of my boobs, I am larger than my sister, and she is two years older. She would make fun of me but, I knew she was just jealous because I had developed before her. 

Once inside Cole quickly found his buddies, which only consisted of my cousin Jeff and his other friends, Jacob and Frankie and left me standing at the door without a backward glance. 

I have tried to get his attention for most of the night, with no luck. I walkwd by him a number of times saying things like "Hey, Cole would you like some cake?" Or "So have you seen the whole house yet?" He would just laugh and ruffled my hair like I was a pet.

Nothing I have done seems to get his attention. My plan was not as fool proof as I thought.

I sigh, loudly.

I am just about to give up when I saw him make his way to the bathroom. Yes, finally! I know this is my only shot so, I follow him and wait in the hall right outside the bathroom. I hold my breath and pray that no one will have the urge to pee any time soon. 

My prayers were answered. The hallway remains clear as he comes out of the bathroom. Taking av deep breath, I lean back on the wall across the door and slouch like I am bored, I give him my best sexy look and say all breathy, "So what does a girl have to do to get you alone?"

I stand there with my heart beating so fast and loud that I just know he can hear it. I sucked in a breath as he looks me up and down. 

He smiles that slow sexy smile that makes me want to sink into a puddle and says "So little Ella wants to get me alone?"

I just nod my head as my mouth goes dry and I look up at him with my, what I hoped was sexy, green eyes and smile.

He steps closer and cages me against the wall with his arms on both sides of me. He licks his lips and says in a low growl against my ear "What Ella wants...," My heart skips several beats and I get light headed."...she gets"  Oh sweet baby Jesus! I nearly faint with want.

This was it the moment I had worked for and planned for. I was finally going to get my kiss. I just stand there starring at him drinking in his warmth. His sky blue eyes look into my green ones and he leans in close, never breaking eye contact. I can feel my body begin to heat up all over. My breathing becomes shallow. 

I feel the heat of his breath on my face as he whispers close to my ear "Isabella, be careful what you wish for."

He pulls back slightly as he continues to looks in my eyes, his gaze lowers to my lips, I can't help but lick my lips under his close scrutiny, his gaze tracks my movement and I think I see his eyes change color and become brighter, but it's gone in an instant and he looks down, I think it must be a trick of the light. 

I clear my throat and he looks up into my eyes again, he lightly brushes a stray lock of hair off my face and tucks it behind my ear. He leans in close again and his lips brush mine. Just a light touching of his lips against mine and I let out a soft sigh. He leans in and starts to nuzzle my neck, he takes a deep breath, then suddenly he stands up straight and stares at me for a long moment, he shakes his head and I think he whispers "It can't be." but I am not sure, then he grabs my hand and leads me to the first open door, which happened to be my sister Amber's room. 

Once inside he shuts the door and stands in front of me. He cup's my face with his hands and brushes my cheeks with his thumbs. He leans down and again just lightly brushes his lips against mine. I sigh again and lean into him.

He pulls back "It seems that you have grown up on me little Ella," he looks intently at me. He shakes his head and whispers "when did that happen?" he closes his eyes and lets out a long sigh. 

I give him a bright smile and shake my head. "I don't know. I have always..." I don't get to finish my sentence. He captures my lips with a hard kiss that steals my breath. His lips move over mine hard at first but then soften as his tongue lightly teases my lips. I am at a loss, I don't know what to do, I have never kissed a guy before. I open my mouth to tell him this when he plunges his tongue in my mouth and begins to explore. I stand frozen not even able to breath.

My stillness breaks the spell and he pulls back from my lips and chuckles softly.

"So, am I your first kiss?" I think I hear a low growl in his chest, and his eyes become brighter "Good!" He says gruffly and I just nod my head to stunned to speak. 

The things his kiss dose to my body is soul shattering. I lick my lips and again he follows the movement. He bends his head and captures my lips again. I tentatively let my tongue touch his lips. He makes a low growling noise deep in his chest, I shiver and feel my body heat up. I move my hands to press on his chest as I slowly slide them up and around his neck. I press my body against his and the heat he's giving off feels like I have been branded. 

He deepens the kiss and I follow his lead. His hands leave my face and brush over my shoulders, down my arms and then to my waist. He pulls me in closer never taking his mouth from mine. He keeps one hand on my waist and the other slowly rubs up my side until he gently cups my breast. 

At his touch I jump, not prepared for the jolt to my body from the feel of his hands. He pulls away from my lips and looks at me.

He has a faintly surprised look on his handsome face. He looks down at his hand cupping my breast and he shakes his head. "Ella, I, there is something you don't know, I mean I need to tell you..." He doesn't get to finish his remark as the door swings open and the lights are switched on.

I blink rapidly as my eyes adjust to the now bright room. Cole whips his head around and I swear he snarls at my sister who stands there with her mouth open and closing. 

She looks like my little brothers gold fish and I put my hand over my mouth to cover the giggle that erupted.

She slams the door and snarls back at Cole, "What in the hillbilly hell is going on in here?" Really did my super cool older sister just say hillbilly hell? 

She tries to sound stern and bossy but her voice comes off squeaky and I can't help it, I erupt into laughter. She frowns at me and points her finger at Cole who has not moved. His hand is still on my breast. My sister sees this and rushes over and slaps his hand. 

"Keep your grubby paws off my baby sister!" He drops his hand and shakes his head and just stands there with a lost look on his face. I want to reach up and touch his face and I move toward him only to be jerked back by my sister. 

"Oh no you don't! You are so lucky I don't go get mom and dad and tell them what that mongrel..." She tilts her head in Coal's direction "was doing to you. If I had known this is what you were going to do, I would have never invited you Cole!" 

I stop letting her drag me out of the room and jerk my arm free from her grasp. Thru my teeth I say "He wasn't doing anything I didn't want him to do!" 

My sister shakes her head and gently takes my hand. She is patting my hand lightly as she says in a low voice. "Honey, guys like Cole, well they don't really care about girls like you...." 

I interrupt her and say defiantly "He is standing right here! Don't talk as if he's not in the room, and what do you mean girls like me?" at my words Cole comes back from where ever his mind was. 

"Your sisters' right." I look at him dumbfounded that he was agreeing with my sister. 

"But, Cole I..." 

He cuts me off and says coldly "Hey, kid she's right. I was just wanting to see how far you'd go, one willing girl is just as good as another. No skin off my nose. Thanks for the distraction."

He looks away and runs his hand thru his hair. I try again to speak to him he just waves it off. I reach out to touch his arm and he quickly moves out of my reach. 

My sister stands next to me and puts her arm around my shoulder. "I think you need to leave now Cole. I don't ever want to see you around my sister again, and I think you know why." 

He looks at me for a very long moment. I think I see longing and maybe regret in his beautiful blue eyes and then a flash of brightness. He shakes his head, turns and he walks quietly away and doesn't look back. 

I stare at the empty door way. My heart is breaking and I am at a loss. I had him right here. I reach up and touch my lips with my fingertips. They are still tingling from his kisses. I turn to my sister and say quietly.

"I love him you know." She leads me to her bed and we sit down. I begin to pick absently at her yellow and blue lace bedspread as I stare blindly around her colorful room. 

She picks up my hand and holds it tightly. "Sweetie, I know you think you're in love, but you are only thirteen. He's just, not the right..."she pauses. "...type of guy for you." She reaches up and brushes back a stray lock of hair from my cheek. I begin to cry, because Cole had just done the same thing.

"Oh baby girl, He will use you and when he's done just walk away. His kind always do." She finishes her speech and hugs me as I continue to quietly cry. I know that I love him if I didn't this wouldn't hurt so much. 

My sister continues to hold me murmuring soothing words. I don't listen, I just sit numb and confused. I so wanted him to be my first for everything. 

After a while Amber leaves me in her room. She wanted to stay with me but it was her birthday party and just because my world had ended didn't mean her party should.

So I tell her I am fine, but I am not up for seeing anyone for the rest of the night. She hugs me one last time and quietly leaves.

I continue to cry, but the memory of that kiss doesn't fade. I walk back to my room and shut the door. I lean against it and slowly sink to the floor. I process what Cole said to me. I know he didn't mean a word of it, because he's my soul mate and no matter what my sister says, I am going to have him. He's going to be mine.

Because what my sister doesn't know is when you find your soul mate you are destined to be together.