Smooth-ish Criminal

I was single for awhile and did the normal Millennial thing and joined every dating app you can think of. Few months in I am swiping away and see this guy; dark skin, husky, not un-attractive but I was broadening my horizons. I swipe to whichever direction meant I was intrigued and wanted to match, we match! Before long he sends me a message and we start chatting. A couple days of this and we have decided to meet up for coffee.

It's date time and I get to the place early, as I always am for everything. I wait for about ten minutes, no sign of him. So, I hop in line and order my coffee. He shows up. He rolls up in a black SUV, dark tinted windows, black t-shirt, black jeans, dark sunglasses... sure doesn't match my choice of printed leggings and pink shoes that I wore for running errands. His look has a personality about it. Arrogant, self-absorbed, and high maintenance are some things that pop into my head once I take in his appearance. He's really awkward, says "Hi" to me and hops in line behind me. There is very little conversation while we are waiting, he only notes after I've ordered that I seem to know exactly what I want. He isn't wrong. At this point I already know I shouldn't have come to this meet-up.

We wait silently for our coffees then struggle to find a table in an entirely empty coffee shop. We get seated, he pulls out two phones and sets them in the middle of the tiny, round table. Then the boring questions start. You said you had kids? Where are you from? Do you like Netflix? A phone dings. He picks it up, texts like mad and sets it down. Boring conversation continues, we aren't getting anywhere. A phone buzzes. He picks up the other phone, texts something, checks an app and sets it down. Then the other phone dings again; he picks it up, responds, sets it down. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. I ask him why he has two phones because I cannot be involved with a mobster or drug dealer. He smiles "No, I'm a contractor. I work with the military a lot. You're funny, I like that." A little longer at this coffee date and we are leaving. He leans in for a hug and promise we will do something again really soon.

About a week later I realize I didn't hear anything from him so I reach out, "Hey! How's your day been?" No response, no surprise. A few days later he texts me some "Hey" equivalent. I may have taken the sassy road and basically stated I wasn't interested, he has two phones which he used the entire date and couldn't bother to text me back for days? Been there, done that and I know he's not into me. I added a 'best of luck out there' for good measure and good karma.

You know how they say it's a small world? Let me tell you, it's true. Several months later and I'm sitting at work reading an article about a man who has been running a fake business, charging people for work he and other contractors weren't completing, no one could reach the company for comment and so on. The guy was sent to jail on some charges and had to bond out, I go research that. I pull up the information and I recognize him; it's the guy I met for coffee. He even used a fake name on his dating page, like that would never come out? I imagine that the reason he didn't contact me again was in fact because I told him I worked in law enforcement, at the jail and he knew this would catch up with him and land him in a cell.

A bad date and ghosting that came full circle for me. Justice.