Money Can't Buy Sleepiness

One hour. 

The blonde stood inside the doorway to the subdivision home, frozen in place. The house was silent. Outside, she heard the Toyota Corolla slowly pulling out of the driveway. 

Emily’s hazel eyes scanned the house. The living room was painted in subtle tan colors and looked overly tidy. She noticed that all of the outlets had safety covers, and there were no furniture items with pointed corners in sight. 

Her attention shifted to the hallway. Down the hall were three white doors, all closed. One had a few floral stickers plastered across it, and a colorful wooden sign. 

Madeline. 

She’d have to avoid that door at all costs. 

Emily quietly shuffled into the living room and plopped down onto the plush sofa, sinking deep into it. She gently rested her Louis Vuitton bag onto the couch cushion beside her. Shrugging her cashmere cardigan off, her eyes landed on the silver analog clock above the TV. 

3:36pm. 

It had only been four minutes since Kara left. 

The young woman sighed and slipped her feet out of her Western-style heeled leather booties.

“I guess I’ll just kick back and play on my phone.” Emily softly muttered to herself and took out the device. Kara said she’d only take about an hour at the store. Her words still lingered in her head.

“Thank you so much, Em! You’re the best. This will be so much faster without having to take Maddie. I’m sure she’ll be good. She sleeps like a log – I doubt she’ll even wake up!”  

Easy peasy. Right? Emily glanced at the floral door from where she sat. She took an early childhood class only two years ago in junior year. It wasn’t super extensive, but it did go over the basics of taking care of a baby. She even had a fake, robo-baby she had to take home for a weekend to “take care of”. Sure, her grade on that was just barely above passing, but she knew all the essential stuff. 

Surely, she could handle one six-month-old infant if she woke up? 

A sudden static noise sounded to her left, jolting her upright and out of her thoughts. Her gaze immediately fixated on the blue and white baby monitor on the end table. It emitted another buzz, then she heard a sound that made her instantly panic. 

Crying. 

“Oh no, oh no…. She wasn’t supposed to wake up!” Emily groaned, immediately standing and gripping her phone. Her luxury socks slid across the hardwood floor as she stomped towards the dreaded nursery. 

Her fingers gripped the cold door handle. Reluctantly, she turned it, pushing the door open. 

There she was: Madeline… squirming and sobbing in a dark wooden crib in the middle of the cozy, purple room. 

Emily unlocked her phone screen and went into her contacts quicker than she ever had before. Her thumb scrolled to Kara’s contact icon and hit ‘Call’.

Ring…Ring…Ring…

“Hey! This is Kara. Sorry I missed your call–” 

Click.

Emily removed her finger from the ‘End Call’ button. “Dang it,” she muttered, feeling panic continue to writhe in her gut. The baby’s cries got louder as Madeline’s frustration or crankiness or…whatever it was grew. Letting out another sigh, Emily paced around the room, trying to figure out what to do. She so badly wished to hear that wonderful sound of Kara’s contact ringtone, but her phone remained silent. 

Finally, Emily made her way over to the side of the crib. She peered down at the little brown-haired baby, whose eyes were clenched shut as she cried. Reaching a hand down, Emily gently nudged the infant on her pudgy shoulder.

“Hey, Maddie, can you please, you know…not do that right now?” Emily pleaded with the baby. 

The six-month-old stopped crying and gawked at her with bright, watery blue eyes. Emily’s heart swelled with hope.

Then, the baby’s face scrunched up. 

“No, no, no, wait!” 

Maddie let out a huge wail, causing Emily to grip the side of the crib in frustration. 

“Ugh. Okay, Maddie, seriously… Your mom is going to be home in like–” She toggled her phone screen on. “--thirty more minutes…ish. Can you please just go back to napping?” 

The infant only continued to cry. 

The blonde thought hard but couldn’t recall any of the tips she learned back in school now that she was put on the spot. Clicking her tongue, she leaned down and rested her head on the crib’s side. 

A lightbulb went off in her head. 

She picked herself up and dashed from the room, seeking out her pale pink bag that was left behind on the couch. Her hand rifled through its contents before pulling out a mauve clutch wallet. 

The young woman’s feet padded through the hallway as she returned to the nursery. She appeared at the side of the crib, waving her hand to try and get Maddie’s attention. 

“Heeeeey Maddie! Maddie! Guess what I have!” 

Her slender, delicately manicured fingers swiftly plucked a ten-dollar bill from her wallet. 

“Look, I’ll give this to you if you nap for the rest of the hour.” 

Bleary, saucer eyes gaped at her. Emily waved the piece of currency above the infant, waiting for her tiny, grubby hands to grab it. 

Alas, the baby’s face contorted to a scowl. The waterworks started up. 

“Uh, okay, ten isn’t good enough for you? Expensive taste, but I get it.” She shrugged and flipped through her wallet again. “What about twenty?” She pulled one out and waved it inside the crib. 

Maddie’s wail seemed to grow louder. The infant’s feet, covered by her yellow ducky onesie, kicked softly against her mattress. 

Emily’s eyebrows shot up. “You don’t want it? Really?...Well don’t come crying to me once you realize how expensive college is. Trust me, you might wanna start saving now.” She scoffed and tucked the bill back into its spot within her clutch. 

As Emily left the room to return to her bag, she glanced at her phone again. Still no response from the baby’s mom. The clock read 4:12pm - still about twenty minutes before Kara returned. The young woman pursed her lips in thought, pacing around the living room. She’d always been able to solve her issues with money. All the times she didn’t want to do her homework in school? She just paid someone to do it for her. When her house got trashed after a party she held while her parents were out of town? A few twenties persuaded some of the guests to stay and tidy up for her. 

Any time she had an issue, she could pull out her wallet and get someone to fix it. 

But this baby? No concept of money and how useful it is. Emily was stumped. 

Treading back into the baby’s room, the blonde girl hummed loudly to try and drown out the wailing. She plugged her ears and walked around the bedroom, scanning the area for something to help her. Toys? A baby rattle? Something? 

Then, Emily froze. She removed one hand from her ear and listened. No noise. She shot a panicked look over to the crib and ran up to it, worried something happened to the baby. 

A smile. Maddie was smiling up at her! Her little, chubby cheeks flushed as she cooed at Emily, showing off her one tiny tooth growing in. Emily, dumbfounded, looked behind her. She had no idea why the crying stopped. 

“What is it, Maddie?” She thought for a moment. 

“Was it my humming?” 

Assuming that was the answer, Emily leaned her arms against the crib’s side and started humming again. It was a lullaby this time, a soft and delicate tune. The baby looked content, the quiet crooning soothing her tired mind. For the first time since she arrived at the home, Emily felt at ease. She smiled warmly down at Maddie, whose eyes fluttered closed. 

***

It was 4:43pm when Kara entered the home. She walked in, hauling multiple bags on each arm. Looking around the living room, she noticed Emily’s bag and cardigan on the couch. 

“Em?” she gently called out. She then spotted the blonde girl tiptoeing out of the baby’s room, silently pulling the door shut behind her. Kara smiled at her and started relieving her arms of the bags, placing them on the counter. 

“Sorry, I didn’t see that you tried to call until I pulled in the driveway. I hope she was good for you” Kara said in a hushed voice. 

Emily shrugged, looking away for a moment. “Yeah, it was nothing important. She was good… I mean, she’s just a baby. Not like she can cause a lot of trouble.” 

The mom finished putting the bags down and turned to her friend. “Well, I know I was gone a bit longer than I expected. Thanks so much again for staying to watch her for a bit.” She pulled out her wallet and flipped through the bills inside. “How much do you want for your time?” 

Emily’s hand swatted the air. “Girl, I’m fine. Really. She really just slept the whole time. I don’t need anything.”

She walked over to her purse and gathered it and her cardigan back up. Slipping her boots on, she softly added, “She really is a sweet baby.” 

After they both said their goodbyes, Emily made her way down the driveway to her bright red Mercedes. She opened the door and plopped into the driver’s seat. 

“I definitely could teach her a thing or two about money, though.” 

She smiled, absentmindedly humming the lullaby while driving home.