Sounds in a Vacuum

“What’s that noise?”

“What noise? Are you in or out?”

I tossed my ante into the pot, and cocked my head, listening.

“I don’t hear it” Kirsten replied, tossing in a chip. “Three, please.” Her inscrutable black eyes gave nothing away. The perfect poker face.

“That sound! None of you hear it?” I discarded two cards, distractedly. I kept turning my head, searching for the source of the noise I was hearing.

Greg swiveled his head, then shook it. “Everything sounds normal to me,” he threw down his cards. “Fold.” His perpetually frowning features deepened to a scowl.

Rachel, the dealer, took one card. She placed a finger alongside her ear, then shrugged. “Don’t hear it, either. Your bet.”

Growing more distracted, I bet far too much. “It’s really loud! Like a … Clink? Or a chink…”

“That’s politically incorrect,” Kirsten said, a mischievous grin taking the sting from her words. “And I still don’t hear it. I see your five, and raise ten.”

“Is it a chink, or maybe a tink?” Greg asked. I looked at him, gratefully. He stood up. “Nah, dude, I’m just messing with you. I still don’t hear it.” He slapped me on the shoulder, on the way out the door. “My luck’s run dry, and I’ve got watch in three hours anyway. Good night, all.” The door hissed shut behind him.

Rachel took the pot with four sixes. “A clink, you say?” The expression on her broad face told me she was giving me the benefit of the doubt. “Are you sure it isn’t more of a clunk than a chink? Or, maybe, a chirp?” She couldn’t keep the laughter out of her eyes.

The sound seemed to be getting even louder. It was taking on overtones, and subharmonics … “Very funny, guys.” I said, but my voice was faint and preoccupied. “Now it’s more of a … clang? Or, maybe a twang?” The noise started to echo in my head. It was hard to concentrate on anything else.

“Onomatopoeia,” Kirsten mused. She leaned slightly toward me, concern making her thin face relax into an affectionate expression. “A word for a word that sounds like a sound. But,” she shrugged. “Nope. Don’t hear it.”

On a starship, an unidentified noise can spell disaster. Anything disturbing the soothing background hum of air scrubbers, engines, and other ship’s systems needed to be hunted down and accounted for. I stood, smoothing my uniform jacket. “I’m going to tell the captain,” I said. I hated how prissy and brown-nosed I sounded. Then, I wondered what a brown nose sounded like.

“Game’s over anyway,” Rachel grumbled. Her large hands were surprisingly dexterous, as she swept up the chips, and shuffled the cards. She lumbered to her feet, almost smacking her head on the cabin’s ceiling. “You and your clang twang have screwed up the whole night.” She brushed past me, and ducked out the door.

Kirsten placed a gentle hand on my shoulder. “I will go with you to see Captain Clemens,” she offered. “If you wake him, you will want backup.”

I was so grateful, at that moment, for her trust in what I, and no one else, was experiencing. I gave her a relieved smile. We were both mission specialists, and our bond of trust had been tested in many dangerous environments. Together, we left the lounge.

The strange noise was booming in my head, now. It was so loud that Kirsten had to tap my shoulder to get my attention. I tried to shove the—clunk? Bonk?—to the back of my mind. “Do you still hear it?” She asked. “We have left the room, but you still hear it?”

That was when I started to get scared. I stopped in the passageway and turned in a full circle. The sound was not coming from anywhere, in particular. It was coming from everywhere.

Kirsten must have seen the fear in my expression. She tugged me toward the captain’s cabin. “We’ll go tell Clemens, right now,” She was now all business—the ship’s mate, not my lover, or even my friend. We picked up our pace.

Clemens was not asleep, after all. He was studying the wall screen, sitting at his desk. Steam rose from a fresh cup of coffee. His bushy eyebrows drew together, as he listened to me. “You say it’s a clang? Or a twang? Not a beep, or a cheep, or a scrape?”

I clenched my jaw. “No! No! It’s a boom, now, with a whistle, and a hiss, and …” I broke off, trying to find the right words. “Maybe a crackle? Or a snap?”

“But not a Pop,” Kirsten slapped a hand over her mouth, to keep in the laughter. “I’m sorry. An old Earth reference.” She couldn’t restrain the guffaw, when she saw our blank expressions.

“Hyperdrive is off,” Captain Clemens mused. “We’re coasting toward Tau Ceti Three…”

“POW! Creaky Squee!” I almost screamed. “Yes, that’s the sound! Well … Sort of! It’s so loud! Can either of you hear it now?” They both shook their heads. Kirsten looked genuinely sympathetic.

Suddenly, I turned and fled, ignoring the cries of consternation in my wake. I had to find the source of the noise, before it drowned me! Before whatever was making it endangered the whole ship!

Fortunately, it was a small ship—an explorer, rather than a colony or commercial ship—and in short order, I had raced through all the corridors. I found no source, and the noise chased me. Soon, I heard the footfalls of other crew members chasing me, as well.

Now, the noise was growing more complex. It was a cacophony of twitters and chitters and hums. It pinged and ponged in my head. It sang in my ears, threatening to sweep away my consciousness. And, it grew even louder.

I don’t remember ending up in the engine compartment. I have a vague recollection of staring into the baleful blue eye of the drive core, panting, searching for that strange noise, which was now so loud, it was all I could hear. Then, strong arms grabbed me, and picked me up, and carried me away from there.

That’s how I wound up in Sickbay, being treated for radiation exposure. Dr. Nelson stood over me, and I think he was scolding me, but I could barely hear him, through the roaring, the clamoring, the whining, the screeching…

“Tinnitus!” Dr. Nelson raised his voice. “Ringing or clicking in the ears, without external source. It can be caused by fatigue, or changes in blood pressure, or random neural activity. Have you ever had tinnitus before?”

I shook my head. I realized that I was sobbing quietly. I felt my mind shredding under the intense assault of the noise.

A siren started warbling. It cut through the maddening din in my head. “Alert!” Captain Clemens’ excited voice replaced the alert tone, after a few cycles. “We have confirmed radio frequency emissions of fourth-order complexity from Tau Ceti Three. Initiate first contact protocols, now!”

Once again, I tried to run, but Dr. Nelson had restrained me, which, I guess, made sense, considering I’d been crazy enough to enter the engine compartment without proper radiation gear. “Let me go!” I pleaded. “I have to tell Clemens! Please, let me go!”

Dr. Nelson shook his head. “Don’t you think we should talk about what you’re going through?” He asked, gently. He folded his hands over his belly, and bent his head toward me. “You’re hearing a … What did you call it? A squeak? Or was it a squawk? A scratch?”

“It’s them!” I screamed, unable to keep the fear out of my voice. “It’s whatever’s on the planet we’re headed toward! It’s their thoughts! We have to turn around!”

“I’m here, Jacob,” came Captain Clemens’ voice, from the doorway. “It can’t be them; if you’ll think for a moment, you’ll realize that. Sounds can’t come through a vacuum. And, besides, we’re still several light hours away from the planet…”

“Doc,” I turned toward Nelson, pleading with him to put it together. “Tell the captain what you just told me!”

Dr. Nelson’s expression remained puzzled for a long moment, sending my terror to a crescendo. “You mean … Tinnitus?” He scratched his beard, in thought. “It’s a sort of phantom noise. There are lots of causes, …” He trailed off, both hands now knotted in his beard.

“A sound that’s not really a sound,” I gasped. The noise in my head was so loud, now, that it was making me dizzy. “Just random nerve impulses …”

“It can manifest as a whole range of noises,” Dr. Nelson said, thinking out loud. “From a whine, to a whistle … Clicks, ticks, whirring, scratching,…”

“You hear it still,” Captain Clemens asked me, “Even in here? As loud as you heard it in the lounge, or in my quarters, or in Engineering?”

“Louder,: I whimpered. “It’s them! All their thinking, or talking! All their nerves firing!…”

“But it’s just a … what, a clacking? Or a clattering? A chiming, or tinkling, or …”

Someone in the corridor outside Sickbay screamed. It sounded like Rachel, although I couldn’t imagine Rachel screaming, or even coming close. Then, she burst through the hatch. She almost fell over backwards, when she hit her head on the rim. If Captain Clemens hadn’t reached out to steady her, she would have landed on her bum.

“YOU!” She pointed at me. Restrained in the berth, I felt helpless; all I could do was stare up at her, as she loomed over me. “YOU! I hear your rumble! Or a rattle? Or a … pitter patter … You gave me this noise!” She began to claw at her crew-cut scalp, until Clemens once again took her hands in his.

“You hear it,” he asked Rachel, gently. She nodded, spasmodically. “And it’s a … What did you say? A bing? A bong? A ding?”

“All those,” Rachel said, “and something more! A babble! A scrabble, a hiss, like … On Nova Russia, there are flocks of little birds … It is like the little birds migrating, all chattering and chirping…” Then, she burst into tears. She sank to the deck, on her knees.

“Soon, everyone will hear it,” I cried. “We won’t be able to think! We have to turn around!”

Clemens nodded, turned, and left the sickbay. Shortly after that, I felt the queasy sensation of the inertial compensators, as we changed direction.

A few hours later, the burbling, gurgling, rushing noise in my head faded away. Rachel, too, soon recovered her stalwart composure. She pretended like it never happened.

But, I can’t pretend. Now, in the silence of the night, when my ears tick, or click, or keen, I bolt awake. I sit alone in the relative quiet of a smoothly running starship, listening, just to be sure.

I used to love space exploration. But, I think, when my tour of duty is over, I shall go back to overcrowded, dying, war-torn Earth. I will immerse myself in a city full of people. People making all the noises that they make, all of them familiar and explicable. And, I will stay there, happily, forever.