Suspended Desire

The reception area was decorated in deep purple and black. Made of hand-woven silk, they hung from the crystal chandeliers giving the room a dark and regal aura. Light pink banners were hung on the walls of the ballroom, softening the darkness.

The hall was filled with people as the chatter of small talk and the occasional laughter from different corners of the room never stopped. Smiles were exchanged and so were flirtatious glances. It was tiresome to even be in the room.

At the very back ostood Fabiana, surveying everything that went on, nothing escaped her eye as she tried to quash the nerves that were trying to surface. All she wanted was to take what she needed and leave. She never was a fan of parties and hasn't been to one since her debutante.

Granted, her parents were preoccupied with her sisters, allowing her to slip away unnoticed. But tonight, was different. She was to arrive at the party and be seen mingling, an order by her father, one she couldn't turn down. But it has been an entire year that she had managed to sit out from such parties, balls, and events. To be back here was taking its toll on her. The scrutiny of every eligible man and every competitive lady was starting to bore a hole in her back.

Fabiana sighed heavily under her breath as her steady gaze swept the room. She craned her neck slightly, trying to catch her brother who left her side the moment they had entered. But not even a shadow could be found. The soft twinkling of glass caught her ear and she glanced down at the servant who was trying to catch the attention of the crowd. Once the room quietened, he began his announcement.

"Dearest esteemed guests, on behalf of the host and hostess of the Sullivan house, we thank you for taking the time to grace their humble abode with your presence. We are proud to announce that today, the Lancashire Ballroom is once again open for viewing."

As he finished the crowd erupted into the soft pitter-patter of applause.

"Please, do enter the ballroom and enjoy the paintings that have put up for your enjoyment." The servant bowed and backed away with open arms.

The door opened up and awed gasps could be heard from around the room. Fabiana went on her tiptoes to get a peek and she could very well tell why the host was so proud. Before she could take another step and rush in with the crowd, she felt herself stumbling backward and her heart dropped as she was pulled. If she caused a farce at such an event, her family name would surely be tarnished.

“It’s me, stop stumbling like a fool.” The woman hissed, righting Fabiana by the elbow.

“Marianne, what are you doing here?” Fabiana’s face glowed as she realised who was the perpetrator, Marianne’s smile matched hers as the girls looped their arms and started walking into the ballroom.

“I thought you absolutely detested such events. What are you even doing here?”

Fabiana balanced at her question, “I do indeed. But father had requested for me to attend and you know, I couldn’t turn him down.” She spoke quietly as prim and proper girls should do. An etiquette that has been instilled in them since young.

Marianne gave her a look of understanding and rubbed her back. “Well, since you’re here. Let’s just try to enjoy it?”

Fabiana grimaced but nodded. The nerves in her stomach seemed to have settled slightly with the company of her friend. She couldn’t help but wonder, where her brother had gone. He was told to accompany her but had disappeared the moment they entered.

As Marianne spoke without stopping, it gave Fabiana the chance to breathe and look around the ballroom. It truly was a sight to behold, and absolutely an event worth attending. For a moment, her nerves were forgotten as she basked in the glow of the gold and silver frames. The paintings were captured and elevated in each frame as the glow of the candles reflected a warm and sunny hue. It was as though the sun was in the room with them.

Fabiana excused herself from Marianne as she started to get caught in a conversation with another well-established family. She didn’t want to get drawn into the competition, nor give her nerves any reason to reignite.

Walking further into the ballroom, she nodded and smiled politely at the familiar faces and answered questions while asking for the whereabouts of her brother. As she made it to the other end of the ballroom, Fabiana peers up at the balcony and saw her brother who gave her a smirk and a wave. Beside him stood a lady who raised her glass of champagne in greeting. She nodded and made her way up. 

She greeted her brother and curtsied at the lady.

The lady stood unmoving as Fabiana approach. She wore elegance like a shawl, and sophistication like perfume. Appraising her with sharp eyes, she set her glass of champagne down and offered her hand.

“It was a pleasure to meet you, Fabiana. I have heard many things from Francis.”

“All great things, I hope.” Fabiana smiled and bowed.

“You must know that I have a son about your age. Perhaps our families could get to know each other better.” She smiled kindly and Fabiana’s smile froze on her face.

She should have known her brother would try to get her matched at such an event. Cursing inwardly, she excused herself with awkward politeness. She didn’t know which family the lady was from but based on how Francis operates, she was definitely from old money.

Fabiana wandered deeper into the ballroom and discovered a smaller room. The paintings were slightly smaller, but the work done on them was exquisite.

She let herself fall into its enchantment, forgetting about Francis and the lady.

“They’re exquisite, aren’t they?”

Fabiana turned in shock, a gasp escaped her lips as she spun.

A smirk played on the lips of the man who crept up on her. He walked past her and looked at the painting that she was stuck on. Without an apology, he went into a tirade about the history and the workings of the painting. She was so deep in thought that she hadn’t noticed that he had entered the room.

“My apologies, I should leave. It is unbecoming of me to be alone in a room with a man like you.” Fabiana lowered her eyes, trying to back away to the door.

“'Harrington Sullivan.” He spoke, without turning to look at her.

Fabiana paused in her tracks, unable to help herself, she responded. “Who?”

The man turned around and smiled, the corners of his lips lifting in a way that was absolutely familiar to her. “My name, I’m Harrington Sullivan.”

All at once, it hit her. The first bolt on her memories opened and a wave of nostalgia swept through her. The smile that was absolutely familiar was one that she had seen not long ago, the lady who had so elegantly proposed for their families to be closer, that was his mother.

The second bolt of familiarity hit her as she stared into his honeyed eyes. They were friends, a lifetime ago when they were merely kids. She had always favoured him, but being of different backgrounds, they had eventually been kept apart by their families. However, seeing how he was now, it seemed like his family has indeed flourished. 

The third bolt of awe hit her. The house of Sullivan was his home, this was his party. His ballroom, and his mother the hostess, had raised her glass each time the servant had announced.

It was too much for a night.

“Fabiana Reyes,” he smiled, taking a step closer, “Never a day do I not think of you. I’m here, I’m finally here.” His face softened as he tried to hug her.

She didn’t know what to do.

“I’m sorry. You must have gotten the wrong person.” She lied, turning away, she tried to hurry out. Her heart thundering against her ribcage. Her family was not the one and same as it was from years ago. Where his family had flourished, hers had been in decline. This was absolutely unbecoming.

“Ana, please.” He blocked her way, using her old nickname they used when they were children.

“Ton, please. We’re not children anymore.” She chided without realising that she had used her nickname for him.

“You do remember me, remember us.” He spoke, “I made a promise years ago, and I’m finally here. I’m able to stand on the same stage as you.”

Fabiana shook her head ruefully, “Where your family had turned into what mine was years ago, I can’t say the same for the Reyes family. You are in the circles that we once used to be. Harrington, we are not of the same stature, not then, not now. Please forgive me for my insolence, but I do need to find my brother.”

Fabiana hurried out of the room, no one spared her a glance even as Harrington hurried after her. She ducked and hurried through the crowd while looking for Francis.

She stopped in her tracks as she realised that he was still with Lady Sullivan. He looked over and beckoned for her to join them. She suppressed a growl of frustration and walked over stiffly. They continued to make small talk as Francis charmed his way. She felt his presence approaching them even before she saw him. Lady Sullivan looked over her shoulders and smiled.

While Lady Sullivan had worn elegance like a shawl, he radiated with power. He kissed his mother on the cheek and offered his hand and name to Francis who appraised him as his mother had done with me.

Smiling at him, Francis introduced me with a nudge behind my back.

“Our family’s pride and joy, Fabiana.”

His gaze swept over and she felt her heart stop. His eyes lit up with determination, but he lowered his eyes as he kissed the back of her hand. It wasn’t the place for any sort of reconciliation. Not in front of his mother and her brother.

“Fabiana, it is my pleasure to meet you.”

Knowing that Harrington would follow, Fabiana excused herself on the pretext of getting a drink. As Francis and Lady Sullivan continued their conversation, she slipped away.

“Lord Harrington, please conduct yourself with respect. We are at an esteemed event that your family has hosted and I would hate for anything to happen.” Fabiana gritted out, the glass in her hand nearly slipping as she turned.

The nerves from attending an event after a year of staying away from the limelight have finally burst open. Her head spun as she staggered. Harrington’s eyes widened as he caught her arm.

“Fabiana, please. I do not know why you detest me so. Tell me what I have done?” He asked in hushed tones, the pain in his voice broke through.

“Please, just leave me alone for now. I have had enough for one night.” Fabiana’s hand went to her temple, the arm on her elbow burned through her gloves and she pulled it away just as Francis arrived.

“What is going on here?”

The pair turned to look at him and her throat went dry. But Harrington was one step ahead.

“Fabiana does not seem to be well, Lord Reyes, I hope you will see her home soon.” His voice was hard and accusing as he glared at Francis. He was well aware of what Francis had been doing the whole time. On the pretext of escorting Fabiana, he had spent his time mingling instead.

At his tone, Francis narrowed his eyes, the order was clear.

Nodding, he shepherded Fabiana out of the room.

As they left the room, Fabiana took a chance to peek at the man they had left at the refreshment table. His eyes burned into her, a promise that he will not rest until he gets an answer.

It sent a shiver down her spine, but she couldn’t help but hope that he would indeed do so.

There was still so much for them to speak of.