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Sad Fiction

Alex pulled back the covers of his bed, swinging his legs over the side. He took a deep breath and began to stand, grasping the table beside him for support. His legs wobbled as he stood upright, but they held. He sighed and glanced behind him to the window beside the door. He couldn't see anyone walking by; another sigh of relief.

He reached down and shakily unplugged the heart monitor, taking the device off of his finger and setting it on the bed behind him.

Moving to grab the IV machine, he used it as a crutch to slowly maneuver to the large window that looked over the city. The going was slow, and his socks slid on the slick hospital floor, but soon enough he made his way over to the large chair beside the window and let himself fall into it.

He attempted to readjust the way he had fallen, but couldn't muster the energy and succumbed. He was uncomfortable but smiled as he gazed outside the window. He could see the pinprick lights of the cars going by below, the people on the sidewalk like ants. He could see two people kiss under a streetlamp before walking away, arms swinging. He smiled and felt a twinge of pain in his chest. He wished he had had the chance to fall in love and experience its wonders.

At another time, Alex wouldn't look upon the city life with such joy and appreciation; he recalled how often he complained about it. Now he would give anything to walk the streets again, or kiss someone under a street lamp.

As he watched, he saw a flicker of movement from the apartment complex across from him. Sitting on a balcony with a small lantern was a girl. He couldn't really make out her face but saw she was waving furiously at him. He waved back.

He watched her duck into her apartment and emerge a few moments later with what looked to be a large whiteboard and a handful of markers. She sat on the balcony and began to write, holding the board up for him to read. He couldn't make anything out and shook his head at her. She frowned and looked around her feet, hopping slightly as she picked up the lantern and held it up to the board. The lighting was still not great, but he could read the words now.

"Hi, how are you?"

He shrugged and gave her a thumbs up. She smiled and used a blanket from the balcony to wipe the board, writing a new message.

"Do you like watching the city at night too?"

He nodded. Erase, rewrite.

"Are you super sick?"

Another nod from Alex.

"Are you going to get better?"

Alex shook his head. The girl frowned and he saw her rub a closed fist in a small circle on her chest, sign language for sorry. He shrugged. He had known from the second his illness came back that he wouldn't be able to beat it a third time, and as such had accepted his fate. He had even become immune to the mournful looks people gave him once they knew his fate.

Alex saw the girl put the board down and wipe her face. She picked up the board again and wrote.

"Do you have cancer?"

He nodded. The next message came slower as the girl became distracted with whatever was on her face. Alex guessed that she was crying.

"I lost my brother to cancer."

He attempted to sign sorry back to her.

"I wasn't with him when he died."

He frowned.

"Can I stay with you until you go?"

He nodded and she gave him a small smile.

"My name is Britta btw."

He waved. She laughed and waved back.

"I think you're cute."

He felt his face flush and blinked away tears. He hadn't heard anyone give him a compliment in a very long time. He always overheard the nurses talking about his looks, how his face was sunken in, his body extremely thin, and he was practically half dead.

He shook his head at her, reaching up to wipe his own face.

Britta nodded back at him.

"Cancer or no cancer, you are the cutest guy I've seen."

Alex looked down at his hands and saw the board flip out of the corner of his eye.

"I wish I could get to know you better."

He nodded and attempted to wipe away another tear, but failed as he began to cry harder. Though it made breathing even more difficult than it already was, he didn't care. It was his last night, why not let himself feel this way one more time?

Britta stayed quiet as he continued to cry, coming to a stop after a good amount of time had passed. He sniffled and looked up at her, but there was no message.

She smiled at him, and he smiled back. They sat and smiled at each other for a while, no more words written. Night slowly began turning to dawn as Alex's breathing became more and more labored. He became aware of the loss of feeling in most of his body and wished he could wave one more time at Britta. He tried to raise his arm, but his body wouldn't cooperate. Britta seemed to take notice of what he was attempting to do and nodded.

The first rays of light hit Britta's balcony and bathed her in its brilliance. Alex gazed in awe as Britta smiled, her deep green eyes misty with tears. He smiled weakly back and began to close his eyes. As he felt himself slipping away, he thought to himself, "She's pretty cute too."

I watched the boy close his eyes, and waited. Part of me hoped he would open them again. A woman came into the room and collapsed beside him, confirming what I knew was true. A few nurses came and moved him from the chair, maneuvering around the woman, her shoulders rising and falling as she cried. I grabbed my whiteboard and wrote one more message down, turning it to face her. The woman looked up from the floor towards me and put a hand to her mouth. She nodded and mouthed thank you to me. I nodded back and began to slowly erase the words.

"He wasn't alone."

June 04, 2021 19:27

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