The Obscure Tradition

Submitted into Contest #271 in response to: Write a story that includes the line “Have we met before?”... view prompt

2 comments

Horror Thriller

Every Six Years

The night was dark and heavy over the small county of Hesse. The stars were hidden behind a veil of thick clouds, and the wind blew with a chill that cut to the bone. However, the ominous atmosphere did not diminish Vanessa’s excitement, a six-year-old girl for whom this day was one of the most special of her life. Her parents had promised her a surprise, one that, according to them, would change her life forever.

The birthday party was held in the main room of the Müller house, decorated with balloons and streamers, though the number of guests was smaller than Vanessa had imagined. Only her parents, her grandfather, and her aunt Elsa were present. There were no friends, no schoolmates. Something in the air felt dense as if everyone was waiting for a crucial moment.

"Are you ready for your surprise, dear?" her mother asked, with a strange smile, as if she knew something Vanessa couldn’t understand.

"Yes, Mommy!" the little girl exclaimed, jumping with excitement.

Her father approached, holding a large package wrapped in dark paper. The color of the package wasn’t cheerful or festive; rather, it was unsettling, as if it were made of shadows. Vanessa felt a small shiver run down her spine but ignored it, blinded by excitement.

"This is a very special gift, Vanessa," her father said, kneeling in front of her and placing the package in her small hands. "It’s a family tradition that at six years old, you receive this gift. Everyone in our family has received it. And now it’s your turn."

The girl looked at the package with curiosity and some nervousness. She tore it open hurriedly, her hands trembling with excitement. Inside, she found a doll. But it wasn’t a regular doll. It had an unchanging expression, a carved smile that didn’t reach its eyes. It was an old porcelain doll, and although its blue glass eyes seemed real, they had something disturbing about them, as if they were observing beyond reality.

"It’s... pretty," Vanessa said, though something inside her whispered that she should let go of it.

"You must hold it tightly and say, 'I accept you, companion,'" her grandfather instructed from his chair, with a raspy, grave voice that allowed no argument.

Vanessa, with a lump in her throat, obeyed. She grabbed the doll tightly and whispered the words, "I accept you, companion."

As soon as the words left her lips, she felt a sudden dizziness. Everything around her began to spin. The ground disappeared beneath her feet, and the lights in the room faded, replaced by total darkness. The air seemed thick as if she were underwater. She wanted to scream, but her voice wouldn’t come out. The darkness enveloped her, and the last thing she saw before losing consciousness was the unyielding smile of the doll.

When Vanessa opened her eyes, she was no longer in her living room. The atmosphere was entirely different. She was in a dark and cold place, the walls were made of stone, and the air was filled with the smell of dampness and decay. She slowly sat up, feeling a sharp pain in her head.

"Where am I?" she murmured, her voice breaking with fear.

Looking around, she realized she was in a cell, with metal bars separating her from a dimly lit hallway by torches. There were no windows, no visible doors, and the only thing accompanying her was the echo of her own movements.

Terror took hold of her. She screamed and pounded on the bars with her small hands, but no one responded. It was as if she were completely alone.

Hours passed, perhaps days. The notion of time faded. The only company she had were shadows that seemed to move at the edge of her vision, whispering things she couldn’t understand. Sometimes, she heard footsteps in the distance, but when she screamed for help, everything returned to an oppressive silence.

One night, while curled up in a corner, she heard the sound of something dragging along the hallway. She immediately tensed, her heart pounding frantically. From the shadows, a figure emerged. It was tall, hunched over, and its face was covered by a hood that hid its features. She could only see a flash of glowing eyes watching her from the darkness.

"You’ve been chosen, little Vanessa," said a deep, distorted voice. "You’re part of the tradition now."

Vanessa didn’t understand what the figure was talking about, but the sense of danger was overwhelming. She backed away, pressing her back against the wall as the being slowly approached. Its long, thin hands reached out to her, and the girl felt fear paralyze her.

"Let me go," she whispered, barely able to speak.

But the being didn’t stop. Its claws reached her, and with a single touch, her entire body tensed in pain. She felt as if something inside her was being torn out, something she couldn’t see or understand.

The following days were a whirlwind of traumatic events. Each night, the hooded figure returned, whispering things that made her shiver in terror. Little Vanessa, once full of life and joy, slowly faded away, her mind fractured by the horrors she experienced daily.

Until one night, something changed. Instead of the hooded figure, she saw a different shadow. It was small, the size of a child. Vanessa, her heart in her throat, approached the bars and saw something that left her frozen: a girl identical to her, with the same clothes, the same golden curls, but with a smile that was more than sinister. That girl watched her in silence, hidden in the dim light.

"Who are you?" Vanessa asked, her voice trembling.

The shadow didn’t respond. It just watched her with that wicked smile, and then disappeared, fading into the air.

The next day, when the cell was opened due to a mistake by the hooded figure, Vanessa seized the opportunity and ran with all her might. She didn’t know where she was going, only that she had to escape that place. She ran through endless hallways, feeling the shadows chasing her. In the distance, she heard the echo of childish laughter, the same one she had heard in the cell.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, she found a door. She flung it open, and upon crossing it, she found herself back in her house. Everything was as before, the party decorations intact, the balloons and streamers hanging from the ceiling. But something was different. Everything was silent.

Vanessa ran to her mother, who was standing in the living room as if waiting for her. The girl, exhausted and trembling, threw herself into her arms.

"Mom!" she cried through tears. "I escaped! I’m here!"

But her mother didn’t hug her. Instead, she looked at her with a vacant expression, as if she didn’t recognize her.

"Have we met before?" she asked, with a coldness that froze Vanessa’s blood.

The girl took a step back, confused and terrified. And then she saw it. Behind her mother, hidden among the shadows, was the other girl. The same one she had seen in that dark place, the girl identical to her. And now, that girl had an even wider smile, a smile that seemed impossible on a human face.

Vanessa then understood that she had never really escaped. Her place had been taken by the shadow that had been stalking her from the beginning.

And the last thing she heard before the darkness enveloped her again was the sinister laughter of her double, who now lived in her place. 

October 11, 2024 16:34

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2 comments

Jess Norton
21:08 Oct 16, 2024

Hi César! I really enjoyed this story. It was not only scary but also heartwrenching. It reminded me a bit of the movie Coraline. I really love the incorporation of this week's prompt. How terrifying it would be to hear from your own mother. Great work!

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02:31 Oct 19, 2024

Thank you Jess, I really appreciate your positive comments, they help me a lot to improve my writing and continue with my writing career, even though I'm 16 years old I'm excited and happy to receive such comments as they show me that I'm doing well.

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