Me and Everyone's Voice

The rain was rising from the puddles, which makes it hard to avoid getting wet. I tend to stay along the paths that were never rained on to begin with or spaces that were already dry again. Good thing it’s an unusually warm spring, so most of the water dries away before it can climb to the sky again. Still, it will most likely rain tomorrow if this continues.

Like everyday, I entered a small bakery near my apartment before I got to university. A few people already stood in line. Immediately in front of me was the store’s owner from yesterday. He waved at today’s version of himself when that one came to the front for a moment. When the people in front of him had ordered their items a few minutes later, he ordered a batch of today’s newspaper. Nowadays, the only people who do that anymore are the ones who got here from yesterday and intend to sell them again to the people from their own present. When an employee came from behind the counter to give them to him, he didn’t pay, of course. It’s his shop after all. If he gave his yesterday money to today every day he would loose so much of it to inflation over the years.

When she was done with her boss, the employee at the counter gave me a warm smile. “Good morning, Luna. The usual?”

“Hi.” I still don’t know her name but she has really grown on me. After so much time, it would be weird to ask her what she’s called, right? Now that I think about it, how did she get to know my name? “Yes, the usual please.”

My usual consists of two croissants and a cheese sandwich, also the next day’s newspaper. Trying to access the future news via the internet was still a bit too scary and unsafe for my liking, so I’m stuck with unhandy paper. Apparently it will be a very sunny day tomorrow. Seems like the wind will have dragged the clouds that are forming today all the way back to the high sea by then. So I should probably think of something to do before the weather gets bad again.

“You know”, the bakery girl said. “I don’t think anyone else buys the newspaper daily. What’s in there that’s so interesting to you?”

“Well, why would you not want to know what’s coming for you if you have the opportunity? People would have killed for that knowledge in the past.”

She looked around to make sure the two of us are the only people in the room and helped herself to a piece of cake. “It’s fun to surprise yourself every now and then. I mean it happens anyway, whether you know it or not.”

She’s got a point, I guess.

Outside again I passed over a bridge before I crossed the street. Like every traffic light now, the ones for pedestrians are always green. Not that I need a car at the moment, seeing that I live so close to university, but I don’t think my driver’s license is still valid. After all of this space-time-stuff happened, I tried to drive once and the way people handle street crossings nowadays just gives me too much of a headache on top of my usual one. It’s scary enough to cross the street by foot, even though nothing ever happens.

Somehow, my apothecary was on this street today. I should go get my meds refilled soon. If the place is already here, it can’t hurt to do that now, I guess. When I entered, the place was empty, safe for one employee. Her today version studies at the same university as I do and we even share some lectures. She will work here to pay for her studies apparently.

“Good morning, Luna.”, she cheered as she saw me. “I don’t think I ever told you what a fine young lady you turned into these days.”

I walked up to the counter to find a small paper bag adressed to me already on it. Everything I need was neatly packed inside: anti-depressants, headache medicine and hormone regulators. “Morning, Bridget. You tell me literally every time I come here.” Not that I would ever want her to stop, though. She filled me up with a cozy joy each time I get to hear that. It means a lot, coming from someone like her. She is so pretty that sometimes I wonder if I want to date her or if I was jealous that I wasn’t her myself.

“Sure, sure.”, Bridget insisted. “But not during my university years. Maybe I should talk to my past self about that some time. You know, I was really self-conscious about how beautiful you are while we were studying together.”

“No way! You are absolutely gorgeous, in uni and here.”

“I know, sweety. But you of all people know how long and convoluted the road to self-confidence can be. Especially as an aspiring woman still in the making. Even now I sometimes wish I could be as tall as you are.”

I put the appropriate amount of money on the counter and left with the little bag, not before giving future Bridget a hug and a proper goodbye.

There was that boy again on his way to school. He looked lost in thought as he stared up into the sky. The moon was there, as usual, in all its beauty. Right now it was full and round but there was no way this will last for the entire day. I can only guess what was going on in his head today. Sometimes I wonder if I should tell him about himself and me or if it were better if he found out on his own. Evidently everything will turn out well, I just wonder if I could make it easier on him. But that could very well ruin everything. Is he ready for it? I don’t think anyone ever is.

He looked over in my direction and for a moment I could swear our eyes locked. Did he see it? He couldn’t know, right? He’s still too young to know, at least on his own.

It will happen anyway, whether he knows of it beforehand or not. Surprise yourself every now and then, she said... Then again, it would not be a pleasant surprise, I know that part for sure. I remember it throwing me off a lot. And it’s hard to tell if he’s mentally mature enough to accept it yet. If we crossed paths more regularly, I could help him come to terms with the insecurities that will come. Right now, he’s still happy with his life. I should not give him any needless headaches if it wasn’t absolutely necessary.

If I was still his age, how would I feel if I was told? I probably would not believe her. But if I believed her… I should leave him in peace. Once he finds the road by himself, I can still show him the way to its end. I will talk to him when he’s ready. Yeah, that’s the right thing to do, I think.

Still on the fence, I saw a woman suddenly approach the boy. She was so pretty. In a lot of ways she reminded me of future Bridget but it was very clearly not her, just someone with similar taste. Bridget wasn’t nearly this tall. The woman crouched down and talked to the boy, though the two were too far away for me to listen in. His eyes opened wide in disbelief, even from over here I could see that. The woman smiled at him and pointed into my direction with another few words. They definitely knew I was watching.

She waved him goodbye and his eyes followed her as she walked away from him towards me. Only when she was right next to me, I noticed that I stopped walking. How long have I been standing here now? From up close, she wasn’t as tall anymore but she still had to tilt her head down to look me in the eyes. I wish I had the confidence to tie my hair back like she did. She was everything i aspired to be.

“You’re welcome.”, she said. “Oh and by the way, the bakery girl is called Madeline. You should ask her out.”