Crisis and Opportunity

Jess looked at her completed vision board and was excited for the year to come. She looked at her three main parts, the largest parts by far. A large four bedroom house complete with a quarter acre lawn and a white picket fence. It was a perfect house to house a perfect family. Speaking of family, to the bottom right of the house was a picture of a tall, dark handsome man with a dress shirt slightly open to reveal a chest that would put most marines to shame and the faint outline of rock hard abs underneath. She had taken the picture from a romance novel on Canva called ‘CEO Billionaire’. The next picture had nothing to do with others, just her. A creative desk space, general area really with a laptop, camera, coffee, plant and an inspirational quote. Jess could see herself working there, being creative and doing her own thing. 

‘New year, new me!’ Jess said. 

‘That’s funny, because it looks a lot like the same you from the last vision board last year.’

Jess turned around to see her sister, Sam, leaning against her bedroom doorway with a smirk on her face. 

‘’Don’t you have a classroom of teenagers to bore to death Sam?’ Jess said.

‘School doesn’t start for another week because of how Christmas fell on the calendar. I thought I’d stick around a few extra days to hang out with mom, and annoy you of course’

Sam entered the room to take a closer look at the vision board. 

‘Sure, come right in. By all means, judge away.’ Jess said.

‘Way ahead of you. That is a nice looking home. Only four bedrooms?’

‘It’s my starter home. I didn’t want to be too ambitious. This is only a vision board for this year.’

‘I see a lot of pictures but not a lot of captions and actual ideas on how this is all going to become a reality this year’

‘Well, if you must know, the purpose of the vision board is to declare to the universe know what it is that you would like in your life and if I am positive enough and send out good vibes, then the universe will manifest it for me. If you are caught up on how, well, who am I to tell the universe how to do its job?’

Sam looked at her sister with a raised eyebrow. 

‘It’s important to have goals Sam. I vaguely remember you saying that to me once.’

‘Yes, but it would appear that you are treating your goals like a child’s wish list to Santa Claus. How does that work now that you are a grown adult? That is if university students can be described as such. Do you even know what a house like that costs in Toronto? Or even in the suburbs?’

‘I don’t know, a couple million maybe?’

‘And do you know how much a down payment would be on a property with that amount? What kind of mortgage payment you would be making each month?’

‘No I don’t, because my corporate banking sister had a brain fart and quit her job to become a lowly high school business teacher. 

Jess saw that the comment actually had an effect on her sister. This was not usually the case. 

‘A couple thousand?’ Jess asked. 

Sam’s stunned expression returned to her previous one of disbelief. 

‘In Toronto that house would cost you, yes, about two million dollars. One and change in the burbs. A down payment for that is in the hundreds of thousands. You’re looking at mortgage payment probably around $5000.00 a year, before you even think about other expenses. 

‘Like food and entertainment?’

‘Like property taxes and utilities. Any sense of saving for that kind of money? What kind of investments or the income you’ll need? Again, your board is heavy on pictures, but I think the universe should be manifesting a financial plan for you. ’

‘Well, whatever. Look, the board is meant to be taken in its entirety.’

Sam looked deeper at the vision board. 

‘An Ikea desk is going to help you make that money?’

‘No, this is where I will have my job. I will be working from home and have a little inspirational space for me to be creative. And it will be great. I will be so productive. And since I’ll be living at home making tons of money, there won’t be any rent to pay. So take that.’

‘Hey, that’s awesome. Now let me ask the next logical question. What exactly are you going to be doing being creative? What precisely are you going to produce?

‘Hmm, maybe I’ll be an influencer. My instagram page has a couple thousand followers.

‘As one of your followers, allow me to say how absolutely amazing it is to see a quote about beauty is only skin deep and true beauty resides within, followed by three bikini pictures. 

‘I got a lot of followers from those bikini pictures.’ 

‘Maybe this is an opportunity for you to start an OnlyFans.’

Jess laughed

‘Mom would absolutely love that.’ Jess said.

‘I mean, it might be where you meet that rich, good looking man that is also going to be manifested into your life this year.’

‘Yes, he will also be helping me in accomplishing these goals.’

‘Does that sound overly healthy? I mean having to depend on someone to make your dreams a reality? How do you plan on meeting this guy? By swiping right, or going to the college bars on campus, or in your English and Psychology courses at school? 

‘I don’t know, mutual friends? The universe will manifest the opportunity, and I take advantage of that’

‘And what do you have to offer this rich, good looking, athletic and charming man? Out of all the girls or guys out there, what are you manifesting’

‘You know, I think I’ve had enough of this quality sister time, especially if all you’re going to do is shit on it and me. The last thing I need is advice to you when it comes to relationships.’

Jess had landed another blow. 

‘’I’m sorry. I just think that this wishful thinking and positive outlook stuff without a plan is silly. And you’re right it does suck being dumped. But in the end it was good. Sarah and I weren’t vibing as much as late as we did in the beginning. I don’t think she understood the career change nor did I think she wanted to go on this growth journey with me. But I don’t regret my decisions or choices. I am better for them.’

‘I liked Sarah’

‘Me too. But despite all the wishful thinking, there wasn’t an opportunity for growth there.’ 

Sam sat down beside her. 

‘If it's the quality sisterly advice and feedback you’re looking for then I would recommend doing what I did as a path for growth and happiness.’ 

‘What’s that?’ Jess asked

‘Have a daily existential crisis.’ 

‘Come again?’

Every morning when I was on Bay St. I would go down to the concourse and have myself a mini-meltdown. I would think about how toxic my work culture was, the KPI’s I wasn’t on pace to meeting, that could be fired at any point given the turnover rate in the industry, how I had to hide who I was in order to network effectively so as not to offend some gray haired senior VP with old school values. I’d have my coffee and freak out.’ 

‘I didn’t know you went through all that. I always thought you were good at your job.’

‘Oh I was good, in fact, I was exceptional. I felt like I had to be. I got promoted like clockwork, but I was miserable at the same time. So one morning, I bought a notebook and wrote down all the things that were stressing me out and making me feel that way. I thought about what I wanted, and I figured that I wanted to teach and make a positive difference in young people’s lives. To teach them how to navigate the business world that I had to learn the hard way.’ 

‘I always wondered why you switched.’ 

‘Instead of being passive, I got busy. Busy taking the steps to change my life. In that same notebook I wrote an action plan, a checklist of all the things I had to do to become less miserable and more me. To lead the life that I wanted to lead. And then I put that plan into action.’ 

‘I knew you were busy, but I didn’t realize you were that busy changing your life.’ 

‘The weird thing is once I made the decision to quit, I immediately felt better. I felt liberated. I came out to my colleagues and I even started to exceed all my KPI’s. They kept piling on the pressure and while some of my colleagues broke, I laughed it off because I didn’t care.’ 

‘I would imagine there would be a bit of a lawsuit if you came out and then they fired you.’ 

‘You know, they did the opposite. They tried to promote me.’ 

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, I got called into the VP’s office and they offered to make me a manager. I said I was thankful but I gave them my two weeks notice instead.’

‘That’s kind of badass sis’ 

‘Meh, not really. I was going to quit that week anyway. I had just received my bonus and teacher's college was going to start in a month.’ 

Sam put her arm around Jess’s shoulders. 

‘Look, the point that I’m trying to make is that just throwing pictures on a bristol board is not going to get you to your goals. You need to think about what sucks in your life and what you’re going to do to fix it. Make a plan.’ Sam said. 

‘So what you’re saying is I need to get anxious, get a plan and get going.’ 

‘Exactly! That’s how you get the opportunities for growth in your life.’ 

‘What if that doesn’t work for me?’

‘You’re still young. There’s always OnlyFans.’