Love Always

Charlie's eyes popped open when someone knocked loudly and repeatedly on his apartment door; a groan escaped his lips as he rolled from his bed and stumbled to the door. He wiped a hand over his face in an attempt to erase the sleep from his eyes.

“I'm coming!” Charlie growled as he squinted at the kitchen clock: 5:15 am. 'Seriously, this had better be good!' He peered through the peephole, a delivery man stood on the other side of the door; the man anxiously looked down and looked as though he were trying to shush something or someone he couldn't see. 'If I had stayed quiet, I could've stayed in bed for another few hours...' groaned Charlie unlocking the door to reveal a now relieved looking delivery man who was holding a large silver cage that contained a large grey bird.

“If you could sign here, please.”

Hesitantly, Charlie gave his signature and took a large stack of white envelopes; the delivery man practically shoved the cage into his arms.

“Wait, who sent the bird?” asked Charlie calling after the man who was making a beeline for the elevator, “I don't know how to take care of a bird!”

“Not my problem!”

Sighing, Charlie shut the door and looked at the bird with raised eyebrows; he looked at the writing on the envelope as he walked into the living room. After carefully placing the cage on the coffee table, he opened the envelope, Charlie squinted at the spidery handwriting before realizing the author of the letter was his grandmother. 'I haven't heard from grandmother since I was at least twelve years old.' he thought

Charlie remembered walking in on his mother arguing with his grandmother; the argument ended with his mother pulling him out to the car, refusing to answer any of his questions. Charlie had waited a few days before trying to talk to her about the argument, the only thing his mother would say was that they wouldn't be going back at all. Yet despite this, he secretly wrote letters to his grandmother; he kept hope that he would write him back for a full year. When he didn't receive any letters, Charlie wrote to her less and less until he simply stopped; he couldn't but feel like his grandmother had abandoned him. He loved going to her house and spending entire summers with her; he felt safe and loved with her while his own mother hired a nanny to look after him. His mother only spent a couple of hours a day with him, yet she always seemed to watch the clock as though she couldn't wait to get back to work.

Sighing, he returned his attention to the letter in his hand:

“My dearest Charlie,

If you are reading this, it means that I have passed on from this life. There is so much I have to tell you and as much as I wish I could tell you in person, these letters will have to do. You are probably surprised by Bertie my Grey African parrot and though I remember that you are not fond of birds however, I have a feeling you two will become the best of friends by the time you get to the last letter.

I last saw you when you were twelve years old and I have so many fond memories with you. The day your mother took you away from me was the hardest day of my life; my heart shattered into a million pieces as your mother drove away. I can still see your sweet face looking back at me. Knowing your mother, she refused to tell anything about the argument we had and I know that with that curious mind of you tried to solve the reason we were forced to be apart.

I hope you will find the answers you are seeking within these letters.

Love you always,

Grandma May

P.S In regards to Bertie, it is best to let him settle and use the long scoop (in the drawer underneath the latch) to slip in between the bars to feed him...I suggest feeding him like this until he gets use to your voice. Bertie can be a bit...particular around people he doesn't know.”

Charlie looked up to see Bertie looking at him, both remained still as though they were unsure of how to proceed with the sudden changes in their lives. He observed the cage, quickly locating the drawer that held the long scoop that would easily deliver the bird feed; 'I'm gonna have to buy food now,' Charlie thought sighing, 'what do they eat? Better question is: why did she give me, of all people, the bird?'

As though in answer to his thoughts about purchasing bird feed, a sharp knock on the door jolted Charlie from his thoughts. Jumping up from his seat, he opened the door to find another delivery man holding a cardboard box. He signed for the package, and without another word shut the door with his free hand; quickly opening the box, he chuckled, 'You thought of everything, didn't you Grandma?'

Inside the box was enough bird feed to last a month.

Filling the scoop with food, Charlie looked warily at the bird as he muttered, “You'd better not bite me...”

Slowly, inching the scoop towards the food bowl, his hand trembled nervously; Bertie kept a close eye on the scoop, dipping his head towards the food. Releasing the breath he'd been holding, he dumped the food into the food bowl, Bertie looked from the food to Charlie and back to the food before deciding it was okay to eat. Charlie watched the bird for a few moments, feeling overwhelmed he reread the letter from his grandmother; what she had said was true: his mother refused to tell him why he couldn't see grandma anymore. He felt a twinge of guilt twist in his gut, he could've gone to his grandma May when he was able to drive. 'I guess apart of me felt like she didn't love me anymore because she didn't answer any of my letters,' Charlie thought sorrowful, 'I was angry when she didn't and thought if I stopped sending letters, she'd come to the city to see me.'

Time passed slowly as he sat on the couch, he didn't know what to do and for the first time in years, Charlie felt lost. He looked at the clock and groaned when he realized that his mother would be arriving any moment; Charlie rushed to put on fresh clothes just so he wouldn't have to hear his mother's criticism: “I didn't raise you to be a slob Charles!” this is what he heard often. He knew his mother was high strung, she had a need to keep everything as perfect as she possibly could.

They'd only had one major fight and that was when he'd refused to go to law school; he wanted to be a writer and refused to allow himself to be persuaded to follow a different career path. His mother refused to talk to him for a few weeks, and as much as he hated to admit it...it was the least stressful time in his life that he could remember.

Three short knocks rapped shortly, Charlie took a few deep breath as he walked to the door; he hand hesitated slightly on the door knob. 'Let's get this over with.' he thought unlocking the door and pulled it open to reveal his mother who was already frowning at him.

“Hey mom.” greeted Charlie as she walked past him

“Charles, what is that?”

Charlie followed his mothers line of sight to Bertie who started to squawk and flap his wings for a few minutes before settling down again. Charlie made a beeline to the couch and scooped up the letters before his mother could get her hands on them.

“Bertie arrived this morning from grandma May's lawyer along with bird feed and some very interesting letters.” stated Charlie watching his mom's reaction carefully, he watched her eyes focus on the letters as she spoke

“What...does your grandmother have to say?” stuttered Lillian looking at the stack of letters in her son's hands.

Charlie took his time answering, he curious about his mother's reaction to the letters; he noticed the longer he didn't answer the more agitated she looked. He had never seen his mother act like this before; Lillian was always cool and collected, ready for any situation that could arise.

“She talked about how much she missed me when you suddenly refused to let me see her.” said Charlie his tone strained and tight, “I do have a question for you mom...the letters I wrote to her, you know the ones I gave you to mail to grandma...did you mail them?”

Lillian sat down on the couch and simply gazed at Bertie who seemed to be glaring back at her with what appeared to hatred. Bertie began to squawk again, “Get out, get out”

“No, I didn't mail your letter,” sighed Lillian casting her gaze to the navy blue carpet, “I was so angry with her and my reasons for that were selfish...I wanted to hurt her by taking the one thing she cared about the most...you.”

His grip on the letters tightened as he slowly sank into the arm chair, this revelation hit him in the gut like a sack of bricks. 'I knew she wasn't the warmest person but to do something like this...' Charlie thought as tears filled up his eyes.

“All these years, I thought the worst of her,” growled Charlie angrily, “I thought she didn't love me anymore because she didn't answer any of my letters to her...Grandma May is gone now and she probably left thinking I hated her! You didn't just hurt her mother, your hatred for her hurt me as well!”

“Charlie, I'm so sorry,” whispered Lillian tearfully, “I didn't think about that at the time...”

“Of course you didn't think about it,” snapped Charlie furiously, “why would you? You were jealous of our relationship...I can't count the number of times you practically ran out the door to work instead of spending time with me; I was raised by nannies. I want to know about the fight, you owe me that much at least!”

Lillian sat back on the couch, stunned by her son's anger; not that she blamed him, she kept him away from his grandmother out of spite. Lillian didn't have the best relationship with her mother; her mind drifted back to that day as she closed her eyes and spoke softly:

' “I don't understand why you can't just give me his inheritance mother!” snapped Lillian angrily, “I'm going to make sure he get it when he turns twenty one...”

“This isn't something that can be transferred over from a bank account Lillian,” sighed May briefly closing her eyes, “I'm not going to live forever, and so I want to be able to live long enough to give Charlie his inheritance myself.”

Bertie flapped his wings rapidly, squawking loudly: 'Get out, get out”

“Shut up Bertie!” screamed Lillian shaking her fist at the large parrot

“Don't talk to Bertie like that!” snapped May tears filling her eyes, “Lillian, I am firm in my decision to not make you the trustee of my grandson's inheritance.”

“Well then until you agree to make me the trustee of his inheritance,” snarled Lillian glaring at May, “I promise you that you will never see Charlie again!” '

Charlie placed his head in his hands, it felt as his heart was shattering all over again. 'My own mother kept me away from grandma May because she couldn't get her hands on my inheritance.' through teary eyes, Charlie picked up the next letter and opened it. His eyes widened slightly when he saw how short the letter was:

“My dearest Charlie,

In each letter there will be instructions, not only to care for Bertie but to also earn your inheritance. By now, I am sure you've spoken with your mother. I am also sure that you are angry with her; please don't let anger destroy your relationship with your mother. This task is simple...forgive your mother and move on; make your relationship strong again.

P.S Bertie loves listening to Jazz, it will help him relax.

Love always,

Grandma May”

Charlie looked at his mother, he saw the shock on her face from her mothers words. Tentatively, Lillian placed a hand on Charlie's arm and whispered, “I'm willing to try to work on our relationship, if you are.”

“Jazz, jazz.” squawked Bertie suddenly, startling Charlie and Lillian

Laughing softly, Charlie grabbed his cell phone and quickly found some jazz music for Bertie to listen to and sat back down beside his mother. As the music filled the room, he quietly replied, “I'm willing to try...”

Over the next few weeks, Charlie and Lillian read Grandma May's letters together; Charlie began to look forward to his mother's visits. He noticed that the more effort they put into their relationship, the tension between them lessened. Charlie noticed that Bertie seemed to enjoy his company; he was able to feed the Grey African parrot by hand now instead of using the scoop. Charlie began to wonder if he could bring Bertie out of the cage for a couple of hours, 'Does he trust me enough?'

An hour before his mother was to arrive, Charlie sat in front of Bertie and observed the bird for a few moments before slowly moving his hand towards the latch on the cage.

“Alright Bertie, I'm going to open the latch and if you want, you can come out,” stated Charlie using soft tones like the instructions told him, “Grandma May even sent your perch, so that you can feel more at home here with me.”

With the cage door open, Charlie sat back and eagerly watched in anticipation with how Bertie would react to the open door. Bertie bobbed his head up and down, peering through the open door, he watched Charlie for a few minutes. Ten minutes went by before Bertie moved to sit directly in front of the open door; soon he hopped down onto the coffee table and looked around the room as though he was seeing it for the first time.

“Love you Charlie.” squawked Bertie hopping onto Charlie's knee

A wide smile filled his face as he gently patted Bertie's head, “I love you too Bertie.” with those words, Bertie flew to the perch that stood by the window and began to preen. Lillian opened the door, calling out her arrival as she shut the door behind her; she placed a bag of hot breakfast food on the coffee table and looked at Bertie. She smiled at the sight of the preening bird, “He sure seems happy...and that's because of your hard work with him.”

Charlie took a large bite of his breakfast burrito, wiped his fingers on a napkin and picked up the final letter from Grandma May. He took a deep breath, he didn't feel ready to read the last letter, it seemed to soon. His grandmother's letters helped fix his relationship with his mother, to start a relationship with Bertie...the letters even gave him a new idea for a book.

“Dearest Charlie,

When I found out your mother was pregnant with you, I was overjoyed with delight. I knew right away that I wanted to leave you something you'd appreciate, something that would last; by your fifth birthday I knew exactly what I wanted to give you. You are now twenty one years old and as much as I wanted to give it to you in person, I feel comforted knowing that you will love what I am giving you. I am leaving you my house, my land and everything that comes with it.

You will find the keys to all the building in the little drawer on Bertie's cage on the opposite side of the scoop drawer. I love you so much Charlie, I will always be with you.

Lillian, by this time, I expect you have been reading these letters with Charlie and I just want you to know that I love you so much. You're my daughter and no matter what happened between us, it is all forgiven and forgotten.

Love always,

Grandma May