Tamara's stumble

                Lazily, she woke up after her lie-in and made herself a delicious breakfast. As the lovely smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted into her nostrils, she inhaled deeply. Listening to her favorite music from her Bose speakers, she waltzed through her breakfast and left the vessels in the sink.

                                                                                "What shall I do with myself now?" asked Tamara. She was sitting comfortably in her living room. The weather was just perfect for late morning. Mindlessly, she walked about in the room. Finally, deciding to do something different, she went to the attic. Donning her mask and gloves as a precaution, Tamara fished among the cardboard cartons infesting the attic. She found abandoned and dusty books in plenty. As she looked at the titles, memories seem to flood her.

                                                                                In one of those dusty books, a paperback, "The Adventures of Don Quixote: Complete and Unabridged", she found a wrinkled old photograph. She took a deep breath as she examined it. It was the picture of a toddler learning to walk. She was clutching the fingers of her mother and trying to stand. "Was it I?" she wondered. It was not a clear picture. She idly turned it back to find something scribbled there.

                                                                                She took the photograph to the living room and sat at her study table. Switching the table lamp on, she examined the writing. Written cursively, the script looked familiar to Tamara. "Yes, got it!" she shouted as she recognized her mother's scrawl.

                                                                                "What did Mum write here?" she thought as she tried to read the words. She wrote them in her mother tongue. And Tamara had difficulty reading the single line. She had not learned her mother tongue, Telugu, properly, as her parents concentrated on her English education in those days. She remembered her mum fondly. She was Tamara’s friend, too. She had passed away recently, after a brief fight with cancer of the lungs.

                                                                                Reminiscing those days of seeing her mom suffer brought tears to Tamara. Wiping them away, she kept looking at the words written. Slowly she remembered the basics of the language her mom had taught her when she was a toddler.

                                                                                "I need some coffee now!" she thought and went to her kitchen to put her percolator on. As the burbling sound of the coffee bubbling through sounded melodious, she poured the boiling decoction into her favorite cup. Adding a dash of cream into it, she took the cup and slowly reached her study table. Sipping her coffee, she tried to look at the words. She took her dictionary and studied.

                                                                               Her cup was almost finished as she triumphantly wrote down the words in English. "Tamara stumbles on her feet at home, July 2005."

                                                                                "How things were in those days?" she mused as she looked at the cute little frock she was wearing in the photo. She took time to scrutinize the clothes of her mother. Quickly glancing at what she was wearing now, she realized that the clothes were almost similar.

                                                                                With a start, she realized, "I am my mother's age when she got this photo taken with me."

                                                                               Tamara sank into a reverie, blissfully. She remembered the struggles of her mom as she single-handedly brought up her brother and Tamara. They had lost their father as toddlers and their mum continued as a single mom. How they used to struggle with financial and other difficulties. How difficult it was in school to manage as a fatherless girl.

                                                                                She became thankful to God as she looked around. God has blessed both of them, her brother Rohan and her, abundantly. Rohan had completed his education and was working as a Chartered Accountant. He was married and blessed with two daughters. His wife Lavanya and the two kids Akshara and Ananya lived not too far from here.

                                                                                "What about me?" she asked herself. As if in answer, her cell phone chirped. It was her brother, Rohan, "Hello Sis, Good morning! How is the first day of your holiday?"

                                                                                "Yo! Bro. Am well. Looking at some old photographs from the attic."

                                                                                "Don't forget that you are having your dinner with us this night. I will come to pick you up at 8 pm. Be ready. Bye!"

                                                                                "Okey-doke bro. See you later."

                                                                                At dinner that night, they talked quietly. Both Rohan and his wife Lavanya were very gentle with Tamara. They didn't grill her. They let her talk. The love that shone out of their eyes melted Tamara's heart.

                                                                                Over the dessert, she spoke her heart, "I know that both of you love me much and are concerned about me. I have come to a decision regarding my life. I would like to share this with you both, my loved ones."

Over the dessert, she spoke her heart, "I know that both of you love me much and are concerned about me. I have come to a decision regarding my life. I would like to share this with you both, my loved ones."

                                                                                 As tears brimmed her eyes, Tamara wiped them with her napkin, and continued to speak, "The loss of mum shattered me, as you might have noticed. She had been my focus as far as my emotional life went. Of course, I cherished you both as my family. But as mum was living with me, her death left a deep chasm in my home and in my life too. My grief was slow to come, but it did, and it overwhelmed me."

                                                                                Rohan went to Tamara, silently putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. She continued to share, "It took me some time to process my grief. I do know that as we are all saved sinners, we will be reunited with mum one day. But the physical sense of mum’s absence was daunting, to me. My work as a banker took up much of my daytime, but the nights alone were terrible. Especially after I went on staying at my home."

                                                                                "I understand that Tamara," said Rohan. He finished his ice cream and put the bowl on the table. Tamara continued, "I have now concluded of sorts, Bro. I think I will have to take a call and look for a suitable life partner. It is high time that I too enjoy a family, like you both are. I have been praying for this. Please pray for this and help me out."

                                                                                Rohan glanced briefly at his wife Lavanya. They smiled. Lavanya spoke for both of them, "Dear Tamara, we were praying for you fervently for all these days. And we came to the same conclusion. Let us now see whom the Lord will provide for you."

                                                                                "Why don't we kneel down and pray to God as a family?" asked Rohan. All three of them got down on their knees and prayed. Rohan led them, "Our Father in Heaven, we thank you and praise you. We adore You O Lord because you are the great and glorious Lord God! We join with the heavenly host in praising you, Lord. We confess that we have not been faithful to you all the time.

                                                                                But you are always faithful to us. Thank you, Lord. Thank you for all the blessings you gave us. Thank you for our godly mother, who prayed for us so much while she was here on this earth. Now we are praying Lord for my sister Tamara. You have your own plans for her. Please reveal them to us and let her follow in the way you want her to. Bless her Lord, we ask with a godly husband. Listen to our prayer, we beseech you.

                                                                                Bless us with your wisdom in the future steps we need to take, Lord. Thank you. We ask all this in the Name of our Lord and Saviour, Lord Jesus Christ,"

                                                                                Tamara and Lavanya joined him in saying, "Amen"

                                                                                After a few months, Rohan and Lavanya visited with Tamara. She was glowing. She had called them to call on her. As soon as she gave them some coffee, she started telling them what was weighing her heart.

                                                                                "Dear Rohan and Lavanya, I think the Lord is showing me His will. I am quite sure that this proposal which has come to me from our Pastor Charles is the right one for me. I have prayed for the past few weeks about him. I feel a sense of peace from the Lord. I also have a leading from the Word of God.”

                                                                                "Thanks be to our prayer-answering Lord God. We are so happy for you. We need to find out from the Pastor whether he, that man also prayed about it and got clearance from God. If that is the case we can go ahead with your marriage plans," said Rohan.

                                                                                Lavanya added, "I think Rohan and I will go and meet the Pastor personally over the next weekend and find out about this man. His name is Victor, I think. Have you met him, Tamara, by the bye?"

                                                                                "Yes, his name is Victor. But I didn't meet him yet. Planning to do so at the Pastor's home after you both meet him."

                                                                                "Looking forward to God's blessings on you Tamara," said Rohan.

                                                                                "Yes Rohan, thanks and praise be to the Lord our God for all His benefits towards us. God showed me this way through Mum's small scribble on the back of an old photo. She had written it when we were kids. She just wrote a line about my first steps. That single line of hers worked on me, Bro. Praise be to God."