Grandpa’s Memento

“Oh my gosh, I am definitely getting an asthma attack!” Sheryl quipped, her mouth covered with her old scarf while cleaning the basement along with mom. They were moving in a week.

“Mom, can we again go back to change this decision, please?”  

“No honey, sorry. It’s about your dad’s job. Some small sacrifices need to be made for larger good,” pat came Samantha’s reply, as if she was prepared for the question.

Disappointed, Sheryl continued cleaning the upper shelf when a shiny patch attracted her attention. She dusted the boxes that were covering the patch and removed them to find a guitar that was stacked away neatly, as if it was not meant to be in open but was crying for ‘help-let-me-out-of-here’ anyway.

“Mom, I never knew we had a musician in our family! Who does this belong to?”

Samantha’s eyes widened as she turned towards Sheryl, and Sheryl noticed years dropping from her mom’s face when she laid her eyes on the guitar. The glow and radiance were visible like a clear sky. It was as if Samantha had noticed her first lover.

“Well, it belonged to me, but now it belongs there,” she said, pointing to the shelf.

“Wait, what? YOU used to play the guitar! That’s so cool…”

“Sheryl, honey, please keep it back there.”

“But mom, why? Why did you stop?”

“That’s not important. Please keep it back.”

Sheryl wanted to say something, but knew better than that. Mom was always firm on her stand and perhaps even Lord would agree that moving a mountain would be way easier than make Mom change her decision when she takes one.

***

Sheryl sat by the window, as if in a trance. She always felt grateful for the scenic beauty that she could witness from the window, unlike the concrete jungle that she lived in just few years back. She was also grateful that they were moving to another quiet and scenic place where she wouldn’t have to deal with the busy and chaotic life or have a building window stare back at her.

While these thoughts were passing through her mind, the thoughts — or rather questions — that were racing like an F1 car in her mind were: why did mom leave guitar? Why was she so determined to not have it back in her life? Was she forced to stop it? Was it a reminder of a past event? There were so many questions that needed answer. But one thing was clear: the look on mom’s face when she saw the guitar was enough to convey that the guitar still had an important place in her heart, that it was still her love; even if she wanted to convey otherwise.

Suddenly, Sheryl knew what to do.

***

Sheryl realized the unusual silence that day as the family sat together for dinner and decided to break it. “Dad, you wouldn’t believe what we found today while cleaning the basement!”

“What did you find, love?” Shaun asked before having a bite of the pizza he was relishing.

“Take a guess!”

“Honey…” Shaun was about to say he was too tired for it when Samantha interrupted: “The guitar.”

Shaun looked at her with disbelief which turned into sadness within seconds.

“Dad, now why are you quiet?”

“Nothing honey… it just made me nostalgic…” Shaun replied while smiling at Sheryl.

Moments later, Samantha finished her dinner and went to the kitchen. “Can at least you tell me the ‘deep dark secret’ that guitar holds? Why is mom dead against playing it? I would love and would do anything to see her play it again!” Sheryl asked softly, desperately waiting to know the reason.

“Trust me love, I, too, want the same! But your mom had made the decision long back. That guitar…” Shaun found it difficult to put what he wanted to say in words, “... that guitar reminds her of her father, and unfortunately, of sadness.”

“What? Why?” Sheryl was confused.

“It was your grandpa’s last Christmas gift to her. Your mom was a Rockstar in college, and was a part of the college’s music band. But the guitars she used were rented. Your grandfather saved each penny to buy it for her. And ’86 was the first and the last year he saw her perform at the college fest. He also told her he couldn’t be prouder of her and wanted her to continue doing it.”

“Well, then why did she stop?!”

“Because… I guess… it’s like a part of her died along with him; the part which loved to play the guitar…”

“Why didn’t you talk to her to change her mind?”

“Well, you know Samantha…” Shaun gave her a wry smile.

“Yeah, I know… I know…” Sheryl replied. “But don’t you agree it would be like an injustice to grandpa’s soul if she just lets his precious memento lie there in the dust! Like the opposite of what he really wanted for her!” Sheryl was more aghast than sad at the thought.

“That’s exactly what I had tried telling her,” Shaun replied while sipping his lemonade. “But she said she just couldn’t do it. And it’s understandable… after all, he was all she had had in the world…. besides us!” Shaun quickly added while winking at her.

***

The next day, Sherley brought tickets to the Les Misérables film that had released recently, for the three of them.

“Mom, did you enjoy the film?” Sheryl asked as the three were on their way home after watching the film.

“Well, the actors were really terrific, but I actually prefer the play version,” Samantha smiled.

“Sam, you had contributed to the music of that play in college which was like a tribute to Les Misérables… what was the name again?” Shaun asked.

“Mirelle. And don’t you remember I had to literally drag you to be there to be my support and cheer for me?” Samantha laughed and Shaun joined her saying, “Of course I remember you being nervous as a wreck!”

“Mom! Why didn’t you ever tell me all this? I never knew you were so cool!”

“That’s all in the past honey!”

“Well, don’t you feel that it could have been a part of your present?”

Samantha’s face again turned cold but she didn’t say anything. Shaun held Sheryl’s hands to gesture her to not continue the topic. He found the silence that followed to be a bit eerie.

“It’s not like I didn’t try,” Samantha finally said. “No matter how hard I tried, it didn’t make me feel… ‘soulful’… anymore… if you know what I mean,” she added, trying her best to put her emotions in words. She found herself on the verge of crying, but the tears weren’t there. Both Sheryl and Shaun gave her a hug.

***

Two days later, Samantha was shocked and thrilled at the same time to see her friends, Alex and Diane, who were with her in the college band, turn up at her place.

“So, how’s it going? I am just so glad we finally met after years!” Samantha exclaimed as they sat together for lunch.

“Yeah, Sam, we missed you, too. Why don’t you seriously consider joining us? It would be great to have you on board again!” Diane chirped. “You’ve still got it, girl!”

Just then, Sheryl returned from college. “Ah, there she is! Hey sweetheart!” Diane and Alex gave her a welcome smile.

“Hey! You’ve met my daughter before?”

“Well, have you heard of social media, Sam?” Alex replied teasingly, and everyone laughed.

“Mom is a bit sceptical about it for unknown reasons,” Sheryl joked, “Anyway, how are you both doing?”

“As great as we’re looking!” Diane chirped.

“But seriously, how did you know to find them, Sheryl?” Samantha was still puzzled.

“I asked dad about your bandmates and the rest is history!”

“Sheryl sent us a friend request on Facebook and messaged us that you miss us a lot and would love to meet us!” Alex replied, “and the feelings being mutual, here we are!”

“And we really would love to have you join our ensemble,” Diane said. After a pause, she continued, “We know after uncle’s death, you felt you couldn’t do it. But trust me, it’s otherwise.”

“Diane I really don’t…”

“Mom, if you really had lost interest, you wouldn’t have cried that day when we talked after the movie,” Sheryl interrupted softly.

Diane smiled at Samantha, “Sheryl told me your guitar is stacked away on a shelf, just like your emotions. They just need to come out in the open, honey.”

Samantha experienced catharsis as tears started streaming out to let out the pain and anguish which she had tortured herself with over the years.

“Mom, grandpa wanted you to live your life through the guitar!” Sheryl said while wiping the tears. “For once, please change your decision… please give yourself a chance… please?”

Samantha nodded and hugged her daughter. “But I don’t know about being part of concerts… I don’t know if I have the confidence.”

“Then we can start with videos. We’ll record your performances and post it on Youtube. You’ll get likes and shares,” Sheryl replied.

“And when you feel you have the confidence of performing with us, we’re here always!” Alex replied

Hugging Diane and Alex, she said, “Thanks guys for still believing in me.”

“Ah come on, Sam! You were a Rockstar and you will be!”

***

“Hey you’re Sheryl, Samantha Knowles’ daughter, right?” Sheryl heard her batchmates at her new college watching one of videos of her mom’s guitar performance acknowledge her as she walked to the class.

“Yeah.”

“Your mom’s a Rockstar!”

“Thanks! I know she is!” she replied. Her heart swelled with pride as her mom got the recognition she finally deserved.