Reflection

The whispers are everywhere. No matter where I turn they linger. They reside within these walls I am confided in. This establishment that claims to shape me into someone that society will like. Not this empty shell of a being that people think that they are conversing and coexisting with.

I refuse to say where I live or where I used to live because then you might come to find me and I am not risking my current state of happiness.

Anyways, I had to run so I could live my peaceful life. I tell those around me that I was emancipated and live on my own. I have to work a normal job to keep my shitty one-room apartment, and I could really care less about my school. However, I have to keep a “C” average to not draw much attention to myself.

In someone else's story, I am just a side character. Sometimes I feel like I am nothing more. Just someone to fill the void in someone else's story. Not important. First one to get killed.

Coping with this burning rage in society. Feeling like it owes me something for all the pain it has caused me and granting this urge in giving someone else my pain. Giving them my pain for the world to know my hurt, to hopefully be able to share how I feel. Whether they like it or not similar to how fate handed me this misfortune. However, my revenge will only last so long. Someone I do not know who is after me. I'm not safe. I never will be.

“You’re worthless”

“Useless”

“Waste of space”

“IT.”

“I wish you were never born. It’s your fault”! Well, guess what I wish I wasn't born either. I never recall ever asking for this life. No. Hell. being nearly beaten down physically, emotionally, mentally. No one can help. So I have to help myself.

I have to be smart or I will not survive this hunt. But this time I am the one being hunted and studied to be brought down. No more! No one will ever tear me down again. No one will ever receive that satisfaction again. I don't think anyone ever forgets the first time they buried the body.

It was a nice cold night feeling the cold wind dry the blood coming from my hands from the wooden shovel that was abandoned in the alley. Lumps of mud in the forest being soaked in the blood of Mary and Samael. And for the first time, I felt the sweet release of death. Killing Mary and Samael was exhilarating. It was as if something took over and knew exactly what to do, I do not have a lot of memories of what happened. One moment I had two dead bodies in front of me then I was at the cemetery in front of strangers tombs. Now I kill then bury the body in the forest. Yes, I will be going to hell when I am killed but I am okay with that I was already living there. I think actual hell would be better than what I was “living”.

Even though I was killed long ago and wonder this doomed earth. However, the police don't accept that I am dead because I still walk around creating a body count too high for the local morticians to keep up.

There is this man that is after me and he is dangerous. The only thing that drives him is insanity. Always craving to take murders like me down. Ironic coming from me. He is the one standing in my way of a peaceful life of taking it from others. I live in fear. I can feel his glares in every mirror I look its as if I have seen him before even though I have never met him. I vowed that I would never exist in fear again. The only thing to do now is to kill him. This will be so much fun. Imma call him Omar.

But before I have the pleasure of ripping the life from his body like is slowly but surely doing to mine, I have a few more lives to reclaim. Sadly I never get to know the people I kill it takes the fun out of it. I have one rule don't kill anyone who lives in my town. I can't have people investigating too close to me. The closer the kill the closer they will find me.

Killing Mary and Samael was exhilarating. It was as if something took over and knew exactly what to do, I do not have a lot of memories of what happened. One moment I had two dead bodies in front of me then I was at the cemetery in front of strangers tombs. Now I kill then bury the body in the forest.

Now on to my next kill will be some random person I find in a phonebook a few towns over. I cannot attack “Omar” yet because I don't know who he is. The more I look into him I am inviting him into my life and this twisted reality I call my haven and he will destroy it. No way in hell I am letting that happen.

   Alright time to choose someone. *plays fanfare. And the next soul I will claim is “Sarah Carson” in Casper, Wyoming. I’m so excited! It is however close to where I already killed someone else, but I’ll be fine since it was long ago. Hopefully. I must prepare my gloves, reserve a small room at a local motel, and I must do some research about her to make it easy to lure her away from the public eye.

   I will arrive in Casper, Wyoming soon. I must begin to plan how I want to retrieve her soul. I believe I will go with a simple strangeling. The simplicity makes it easy to cover as a story of suicide. I have recently found out she has just broken up with her boyfriend of two years and is currently not mentally stable. This is always getting better and better.

    My plan to approach her is to meet her at a local bar since she posted on social media that she was going out tonight with friends. I am so happy to be born in this era it makes killing easy and thrilling at the same time. I will go to the bar with a fake I.D. and dress sophisticated to hopefully catch her eye.

   Later that night I went to the bar and saw her there. The youth of today living as if they are invincible and act as if death was so far away. She looked beautiful and it's as if she knew tonight was her last night she wore white. One can't even tell where the dress starts and her skin begins. Soon enough there will be purple everywhere. Luckily her “friends” are idiots and left her alone to go get wasted with guys they just met. I buy her a drink in hopes of starting a conversation. I sit beside her and begin talking and act as if I was so interested in what nonsense she spoke of. After five drinks and talking for an hour, we agree on leaving. Jesus christ why do women talk so much. I told her I was going to show her a special place in the woods.

   We arrive at the forest and she begins to sober up I make sure she feels relaxed and safe seeing her bathe in the moonlight. She’s radiant. I approach her and she closes her eyes thinking I will force myself on her I strike. Her speech is impaired so she cannot scream loud enough. I apply more pressure upon her trachea witnessing her eyes gouging out of her skull until the red spheres cleanly pop out. I cannot wait for someone to find her body it is always so entertaining. It's a pity that she stopped making noises. I loved hearing her muffled screams. To ensure that people suspect that she committed suicide I had to hang her from a tree deep within the forest. I stare at the lifeless beauty that she has become and recall something that always happens after killing someone. The very moment they die it is as if I can see their souls leaving their bodies. It is angelic.

   My name is Sam. I am a teenage boy with no family other than my uncle Philip who is the chief detective in Denver. I don't get to see him much because of work but he inspires me to want to become a detective. My parents died when I was just thirteen and then I went into the foster system. It took awhile for me to go live with my uncle. Even though when I was growing up in the system they said I was destined for a world of crime and was nothing but a bad seed. I refused to believe them and continue to pursue my dream.

   Recently I have heard this rumor where dead bodies are just showing up out of nowhere and finding them in the forest when people are mountain trailing. The more I research the more I can see a connection. It is odd because the bodies are nowhere near each other. However, they all have the same wounds. Someone is out there hunting people and I have to stop them.

   With this crime solved I will finally be able to prove myself to all of those people who doubted me. I could really care less about what happens to me I just want to catch this guy. I could probably make my uncle proud. Don't tell my uncle, but I plan on going to these murder sights to look for clues. Once I arrive I will find my answers.

   As I was on my way to Buffalo, Wyoming when I decided to stay at a motel in Casper. It was already getting late and I don’t want to die for such a dumb reason like sleeping and driving.

   I walked into the office to check into my room. The man looked at me with the most curious glance. However, ever since I got out of my car, I felt that something wasn't right. I feel the need to shower for some reason despite having have showered a few hours ago. I look at the warm water running down my body and its brown as if I was working in the dirt. Standing there baffled and confused in what's happening. I step out of the shower and see a suit on the floor I don't recall packing or even taking on or off. I look in the mirror petrified because I see “someone” that isn't me. He stares at me as if he knew me better than I did. 

“Do you know what time it is?'' He spoke with the most familiar voice, but I wasn’t sure whose.

I reply, “6:15 a.m.” stunned with fear I dared to ask, “Why”? With a very hoarse voice.

“What day is it?'' He said so casually. Ignoring my question.

I reply once again, “October 16th, 2019.”

He just stands there laughing. “Oh Omar, how nice it is to finally meet you. I was scared you were gonna find me first but it turns out I found you,” he said with a smile.

I screamed, “Who are you?! My name isn’t “Omar”, it’s “Sam”!”

“Oh my apologies, I am the person you’ve been looking for. By the way, it's the 17th, not the 16th.”

“What?”

I soon realized what had happened.