From The First Glance

Submitted into Contest #27 in response to: Write a short story that takes place on a train.... view prompt

2 comments

General

On the road to hell, there’s a lot waiting… waiting for the train. Getting there is no easy task brother. Well for those who go down the path. The path of which you will die down below. 

You can’t go through the brightness of the day but must wait through the cover night. There’s no map brother. Just a telephone wire and a railroad track. The platform of which you stand brother. You may ask about the platform number or where it is but brother that is something unknown to even the all-knowing. 

I give you tips and tricks on how to go but how you get there is up to the man below. You can wait for the train. You should know that those who go don’t come back. Your going way down under the ground. 

 Not many went down. The only ones who are there are off to work in mines. Those who have been dampened at the mind. They have no free though and no free will the only will that they have is for the time they die and the contract of which they signed when they signed their lives away. 

Not many had stood at that platform until one day. It was a young boy in love with another. The boy did not go for him, oh no brother. He claims it was love at first sight but little did he know just how far he might go. The trouble he may get into for her. 

To him it was love at first sight, to her he was just another lonely boy trying to phase her with his music. Little did she know him, his music would possibly change her life. 

She needed a way out of this life she would wish to not live and he needed someone to be there for him. 

They met at that old platform, oh yes brother that’s right. The platform where they waited for the train to come takes their life away. 

He did not know what he was getting into from the begging. Well, brother, you see he saw that the oh so lonely girl and met her in between the track and the platform. 

“Oh! Do you mind? Who might you be?” she says actually quite strongly. The girl didn’t let anything get in her way. She has been alone most of her life all have left her. She is scared of those she meets but strong as she tries not to get attached. 

“I’m… well, the name is Forrest,” he says to her. He is often timid although he has a way of meeting people. He has a way with words from the way he writes his music to how he speaks to those he knows. 

“Forrest, interesting name. The names Eve. Are you waiting for the train?” she says to him putting out her hand. What she didn’t know is that he was not there for the same reasons as her. Oh no brother, he was there for her without even knowing her. His heart is wide brother and that’s a fact but you see, brother in the world we live in now,  not much comes of someone like that. He has a gift. 

“Well, you see. I saw you standing here and… well, you looked a little lonely so I decided to come and stand with you. If you don’t mind me asking why to go down below when there’s a whole world above?” you see, they see the world in different views, both similar yet different.

“Wow, how have you survived this long. Especially in the world we live or for what it’s become at least,” she says to him with a smirk on her face. She never even smiles, well not since she was young and that’s for sure. 

“Well maybe, in the end, getting on the train wouldn’t be all that bad,” he says to her, not fully understanding he would never survive, be protected, in a place like that. For those he does not feel are worthy to stay well you see brother lets just say he puts him out of there misery. 

“Do you know where we’re going, we’re going down below.” 


“I’ve heard of the myths, about the world below and about the one who takes the lives of others.”  he had grown up reading about such things. 

“So you must know about the train, the train to down below.”


“The train… there’s a train,” he says with an unsure tone when they hear something. “Tooch, troch, eek,” 

The screeching sound of the train is coming there way. He jumps up on to the platform and grabs her to hold her. She shrugs him off her. 

“You didn’t need to do that. I’m fine it’s just the train. I guess you should be on you better be on your way now.” she says to him almost sincerely which she does not do often. 

“Oh… well, I could go with you. Not like there’s much for me up here.” all he wanted was to get closer to her.


“You, you wouldn’t last two minutes, he would never want you,” she says with a smirk on her face and the slightest look of concern. 

She jumps on trying to keep him away when he jumps in after her. He falls on her not knowing. They lay there for a minute. They look at each other with the most wishful look. Eve stands up pushing him off of her.

“What the… what do you think you’re doing” she says to him with a strong look of despair. 

“I wanted to come with you. You see…”


“Stop your giber gaber!” the constructor yells. “Stand up and get into some seats, right over here.” he looks at Forrest up and down “If you think he’ll take you your out of your bloody mind you hear me. It’s not a place of play.” 

“Thank you, that’s what I’ve been saying…” 


“Shhhh, sit down enjoy because this is the last time you will ever be doing that. Haha,” he says to them laughing a blood curtailing laugh. 

They go to sit in the booth by the back of the train. Eve starts to think whether or not this was the best but she knew what she had to do. There was nothing for her in the world up above. 

“So, what are you running from my lady?” Forrest says to her with the slights grin on his face.

“Running away? So that’s the kind of person you think I am huh. I’m not running from anything. There’s just nothing for me up above.” Eve says to him with a certain craze in her voice. 

“Well all I know is running away is never the solution. I should know…” he has a look of hurt and even heartbreak in his eyes. 

“Don’t start getting all sentimental all of a sudden,” she says laughing, he, however, does not. “It was just a little spoof. Common tell me what’s on your mind.” she has almost never said anything thing like this. You see brother she cares about someone for the first time since, well, since she was very young. She learned to care about someone else when she could hardly learn to care about her own being. 

“It’s been a while. My mom ran away when we were going through some hard times. After that, I ran and have been running, I went to see how they were doing a few years back and let’s just say, it wasn’t good. I left when they needed me the most.” he says with a gleam of tears in his eyes. 

“Oh, well I never really had a family or at least one that stuck around. Money was never an option and my parents were never around so…anyway this is way too sentimental for me so…” she’s never talked about that to anyone. She sees something in him she has not seen in anyone else before.

"How do you stay so strong in times of hard, I want to be like that. Strong and independent. Eve, I've only just met you but I truly am in..." well what he might have said is not much of a mystery brother or maybe it is. I guess we will never know as he was cut off by the sudden stop of the heavy train.

"Ok everyone, get your asses up and get in line to see how your fate change in seconds!" the conductor yells across the train.

Eve and Forrest stand up to walk out when Forrest is stopped. "You must not past for he does not want you. The girl can stay but you must go," he says to Forrest.

"Wait, why I need to be with her, she needs me," Forrest says in his defense.

"No, Forrest look at me. I've been through hell back and have never even been down here. My life is not something you know a lot about, I've gotten myself into some deep shit. I'm better off down here." she says to him almost crying. She stays strong-most the time but when one starts to cry you know they care.

"No, Eve, Don't do this, I need you." he starts crying.

"Forrest look at me. You have a lot going for you. This is my life now. Not yours. I don't really know you that well but I think there's a possibility I was in love with you... Goodbye Forrest." she says to him letting her heavy tears fall down her cold face.

"Eve... I, love you too. Goodbye." after that brother they never had seen each other again.

After everything, they still remembered one another even though they never really knew each other all that well. Brother sometimes the most memorable people are not the ones you've known forever but the ones you've lost even if it be to those you've only just met.





February 08, 2020 04:05

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

2 comments

Amelia F
01:54 Feb 15, 2020

Please elaborate if you will. I could imagine that it might be a little confusing.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Keri Dyck
19:08 Feb 13, 2020

I found it very confusing.

Reply

Show 0 replies
RBE | Illustrated Short Stories | 2024-06

Bring your short stories to life

Fuse character, story, and conflict with tools in Reedsy Studio. 100% free.