10,512 to Zero

If God allows for our paths to intertwine again and we are both still single, maybe then we can still get back together. 

Those were her last words to me… 

Today actually marked the ninth year since she’s left, I thought to myself as I looked through my spacious office’s large windows. It’s almost a decade. And, to be honest with you, I really don’t know how I had managed to get past these nine years without her - my childhood friend, my best friend, my love - Misa. I’m not trying to sound cliche but she was the half to my whole. We grew up side by side as our two parents were close from their youth days and live like two houses apart. Whenever you saw me, Misa would always be right by my side. She’s the type of person that everyone needs in their life: a caring and compassionate person. Her smile could jolt you like an electric current throughout your body and before you know it, there’s a smile planted on your face, too. Misa would always put everyone else’s needs and prioritize them before her own. Always having genuine concern for the well-being of everyone around her even animals and plants. She never wants to see anyone in pain and seeing others in pain causes them pain as well. This is also why she had always dreamt of becoming a doctor to travel across the world to assist those in need. She’s so loving and kind, and is always trying to help others. And whenever she thinks that something is wrong, she would try to make it right. She can be pretty stubborn sometimes. However, she’s also the type to shoulder her own problems because she thinks it would be a burden to others. Which is why, at the start of our relationship (which was like the summer before 9th grade), we had promised that there'd be no secrets between us and we’d always have each other. We were supposed to be each other’s biggest support and a 24/7 shoulder to lean/cry on. 

And yet, she managed to keep from me that she was leaving us, leaving me, to a whole another country. The worst yet, it wasn’t through her that I had found out. It was a Monday when our teacher announced that Misa and her family were leaving for Australia this very day. My eyes grew wide as our friends looked at me to see if I had known. I shook my head. I didn’t. After school, we ran over to her house faster than we’ve ever ran in our lives. By the time we got there, Misa and her parents were already loading their last boxes into a truck. When Misa looked up and saw us, she looked surprised but then looked away. Her parents touched Misa’s shoulder and left us alone, on the porch. All of our friends ran up, crying and hugged her tightly as if she would instantly disappear if they let go. I caught a glimpse of a tear escaping Misa’s eye. If she didn’t want this, why couldn’t she convince her parents to stay? Why didn’t she tell me? Even though I should’ve rushed over and demanded answers, my feet couldn’t help but drag across the floor. They felt heavier than ever. If it was a dream, I wanted to be over. But I knew it wasn’t.

It was just the second week of our senior year when she left. We didn’t even have our first exams, homeworks or projects yet. She never really explained the reason for the move. All she said was that the choice was out of nowhere but her parents wanted to start a new company. Not here but in Australia… Australia of all places. Why not here? She had no voice in the matter but she also couldn’t not go either. Which she also didn’t tell me why. But I do know, for a fact, that she loves her parents to death. She didn’t know if and when she'd ever return. She didn’t want me to be tied down and continue to wait for her. I told her I was willing to but she just simply shook her head. She gently cupped my face and said I want you to be happy even if it means we have to go our separate ways. So when the time comes and you do find someone you love, take the chance and cherish her like you had done for me. Even though we both knew none of us wanted to, the best choice was to break up. My parents came back out and I knew it was time to go. I looked at her for the last time. Her chocolate-covered caramel eyes glistened with tears and a tint of sadness. I touched her eyes and wiped the tears away. I held her face as I leaned in for one final kiss: a kiss to say goodbye, a kiss to remember our memories, a kiss to make up for the time we will lose together. A kiss to seal our final promise.  

 After Misa and her family left, the first few days in the neighborhood and school felt extremely off. In school, I couldn’t concentrate like I used to and the energy of our friends felt really dim. We all really miss her. After school, I would subconsciously walk toward Misa’s house but stood still and looked at the empty house for sale. The flowers in the front yard also began to wilt without Misa’s mother tending to them. At least, we still called and texted each other almost everyday. But it was not as lovers but as best friends who were just, you know, ten thousand five hundred twelve miles apart. No big deal, right? Haha, who am I kidding? We talked for about a year or so before the calls and texts started to become less frequent from her side until it eventually became Sorry, you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel this is in error, please check the number dialed, and please try again. Beep. And believe me, I tried over fifty times. And nothing. Still nothing. Not only that, her social media accounts seemed to have all been deactivated. It was like all traces that she was ever here were slowly disappearing. All that’s left are some of our pictures and our memories. Hopefully they don’t turn to dust and disappear either. At least I know Misa did exist. 

It’s so weird walking to places without her. Especially our neighborhood where we lived for seventeen years. Staying here in New York would just constantly remind me of her and her absence. So I had thought it would be beneficial if I attended college further away. So where did I go? I decided to accept the admission from the west coast’s Ivy - Stanford University. However, stepping afoot the campus still made me think of her, to think of our dream, our dream to attend a university together and for her to go for pre-med and me to go for business. In addition to that, we’d join clubs together and probably try out for intramurals and the school’s track and basketball teams. After all, we were both titled captains at the end of our sophomore year in high school. But, alas, I entered the doors to the gym by myself. For the first time and it certainly wasn’t the last. After all it’s been that way for four years. Sort of. 

If you’re wondering if I actually took Misa’s word and tried to find someone else to love. In truth, I did. Or at least I tried to. Tried to move on and maybe forget about, you know, Misa. But I just couldn’t. I swear I put in like 1000% of my efforts but it just didn’t work out. I tried to love her and forget Misa. I really did. During my sophomore year, I met a girl named Annalise in my business class who was also in our cross country club. She was absolutely charming. Both her laugh and smile were extremely contagious. We dated for almost a year. I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a great time with her. But even after all these years, my entire being was still missing a big chunk of itself. The chunk left by my first love. I never cheated on my girlfriend but my head was already pre-occupied by another person. That’s why I broke up with my girlfriend because I realized my heart could not possibly take another person, it was still yearning for someone else. It just seemed unfair to my girlfriend and I felt bad for not loving her a hundred percent. There was nothing wrong with her. It was me. And I’m so thankful that she was understandable and empathic. She understood my pain and it’s been so long since someone’s ever understood me. I hope Annalise can find someone who sees love like she does. As people say, your first love tends to hold a special place in your mind and heart. However, the heartbreak from your first love also hits you the hardest. Not one day did Misa not fill my thoughts. Even though she wasn’t here, our memories and the far possibility of seeing her again pushed me forward. I wanted her to be proud of me and show me that captivating smile of hers: the one that would melt me right on the spot, just like a mint chocolate ice cream held under the blazing sun. If I was to see Misa again, I want to show her my success and how far I’ve gotten rather than some depressed, red puffy-eyed guy she knew from childhood.

After graduating from Stanford University, I got admitted into the Samuel Curtis Johnson Graduate School of Management at Cornell University. Since I already had over three years of experience under my elder uncle’s company during undergrad, I thought why not go for my MBA (Master of Business Administration). Don’t worry, I actually got into the company like a normal candidate with application, resume, interviews and everything. Besides, my uncle didn’t even recognize me because the last time he visited us was when I was ten. Since he’s both the chairman and CEO for the company he supervised over thirty years, he barely had time to visit any of his family. Only after being promoted to Vice Chairman did I reveal to my uncle who I was. Even at the age of twenty-four, I was the youngest vice chairman to even be appointed for the company. My uncle was delighted to have more family by his side. Other than his job, he’s also devoted to his wife, my aunt. Even though he can’t have any kids, his love for her still radiates everywhere they go. You could clearly tell he loved her dearly. Two years after I received my MBA, my uncle and the board appointed me as their CEO (chief executive officer). Just in case, you didn’t know what it meant. Welp, this is the gist of how I got to the place I am now: standing in my office with large glass windows that look out to the horizon. Excellent view, if I do say so myself. Then, there was a knock on my door. 

“Come in.” I said as I turned around. 

“Sir, the representatives of Banana Inc. have arrived. Our chairman and the Board are also ready for you.” my assistant informed me. 

“Alright, I’ll be right there.” I replied as he closed the door. I gathered up myself and headed out toward the meeting room. The long table is occupied with four people on the left side, whom I assumed were all from Banana Inc., and my uncle alongside three of our Board members on the right side.

“Ah, here’s our young CEO.” my uncle gestured as I walked in. I took my seat at the front, next to my uncle. I gave an acknowledgement nod to our clients. 

“Thanks for making time to join us today.” I said to them. “I’m glad we’re able to make this happen today.” 

“Thank you for having us.” the young man diagonally of me said. “I’m the vice chairman and this is our CEO.” he gestured to the young lady in front of me as she nodded and gave a small smile. She looked around my age but dressed very elegantly with long, extravagant brownish black hair flowing down her back.

“I understand flying here all the way from Australia must have been difficult and tiring.” my uncle added.

“It was at first, but we’re pretty much used to it.” 

“Does anyone need refreshments?” my uncle asked around.  

“I’m okay. Do you guys need anything?” the young lady asked her other members. They seemed to slowly nod. “Ah, if you don't mind. Thank you so much.” she replied. 

“No problem.” my uncle said with a smile and stepped out with another board member. The other people seemed to be talking to each other except me and the young lady in front of me. I thought she felt a bit awkward so I decided to strike up a conversation

“So you’re from Australia?” I asked. She looked a bit surprised and pointed to herself to make sure it was her I was talking to. I nodded. Totally unprofessional to talk personal stuff. But hey, she doesn’t seem to mind. 

“Ah, sorry. Didn’t know if you were talking to me.”

“No worries.”

“But yes, I live in Australia. For almost nine years now.” she answered. 

“I see.” I nodded. “Must be amazing there, huh?” 

“It is. But I think the US is much better.” 

“You think so?”

“Yeah, why not? You don’t think so?”

“Cause it seems nowadays a lot of people are going to Australia.”

“Really? But more people come to the US.”

“I guess so.” 

“Have you been to Australia before?” she asked. 

“I haven’t got the chance to but I have a… friend there.”

“Ahh, I see.” she said. “Do they like it there?”

“I’m not really sure. We kind of lost contact.”

“Oh, I see.” 

“Yeah.” Just then, my uncle came in with some drinks and snacks, too. 

“Here you go.” 

“Ah, this is a bit much.” the young lady exclaimed. 

“Is it? I don’t think so.” my uncle replied. “Help yourselves.” I chuckled. Typical uncle. 

“Why don’t we get down to business?” I said once everyone was settled. “We have several things to cover this afternoon, well, mostly going over our contract.” We spent an hour going over our two companies then to our plans and visions for the partnership. 

“Let’s move onto our final agenda.” my uncle stated. “Bob, could you hand everyone the contract folders?” my uncle asked and immediately, my uncle's assistant was on his feet. “Please look it over and make sure it matches what we’ve said earlier.” We all began looking through it. Fifty fifty percent share, okay… management, okay… liability, okay… contract binding, okay… Yup, everything looked okay to me, I thought to myself as I got to the last page where I had to sign my name. I looked it over to make sure I signed in the right place. And that’s when I saw it. Under the label ‘the CEO of Banana Inc.’ . I examined the paper again to make sure my eyes were not deceiving me. It couldn’t be… I closed the folder and looked up around the same time she did, too. Her facial expression mirrored mine. I could only imagine what she was feeling. Her expression began to soften and the smile I knew too well slowly crept back into existence. I could feel the emptiness in my heart began to slowly stitch up again.

It was confirmed. Misa had returned. 

(TO BE CONTINUED?)