Being Lisa

Lisa sat behind her desk as she did every day. Her desk chair was set to a higher setting so her feet do not reach the floor because if the chair was any lower it would be impossible for her to use the computer keyboard for her data entry tasks. Her arms would be too low to comfortably rest on the desk while she typed. Even now her arms carried indentations from the edge of the desktop and it caused her forearms to ache., As she lowered her arms to her sides for a much needed rest, her thoughts were on things she would say to her boss the next time he brought more data needing to be input to their system. “You have to find a desk that is lower or a chair that adjusts higher. My typing speed is suffering because I have to stop to get circulation back in my arms. I can’t do the job properly if I don’t have the proper equipment.”

When her arms needed resting again she thought of the co-worker in the cubicles next to her. She constantly chewed gum and liked to chew with her mouth open so all sorts of disgusting sounds interrupted Lisa’s concentration. It slowed her typing speed worse than the desk and chair. The next time they both were in the break room she would tell that woman off good. This was a workplace and chewing gum that loudly with an open mouth was selfish and needed to stop. 

It was break time now so Lisa left her cubicle and headed for the break room. She could use a cup of strong coffee to see her through the last of the day’s work. Before she reached the break room, her boss passed her. “How is everything going, Lisa? Your data entry seems to be improving. Good job!”

“Thank you, sir. Everything is going well now.”

With that they parted ways and Lisa entered the break room. She poured her coffee then looked around to see if a seat was available for her to sit down. She spied only one available. It was right next to the noisy chewing woman in the cubicle next to her but she went to it anyway. As she sat down the woman said, “Hi neighbor. I hear your typing speed has improved since you started here two weeks ago. Way to go.”

“Thank you. My name is Lisa and I’m happy to be here. What brand of chewing gum do you like the most?”

“ I don’t have a favorite brand but I do like to chew gum. It seems to keep my typing rhythm steady. Oops, it’s time for me to go back to work now. See you later.”

As Lisa sat at the now empty table she thought of all the people she wanted to tell off or demand something of. She had to be more aggressive in talking to others. Why couldn’t she actually tell people when they were unfair or thoughtless? There must be something wrong with her. She glanced at the clock on the wall and saw her break time was over. She drank the last of her coffee and went back to her cubicle.

The rest of the afternoon continued with thoughts of people who had taken advantage of her over the years. She had often thought what she would like to say to them when they were not near her but when she was where she could tell them off she never said what she wanted to say. She was always polite and nice the way she had been raised. Well, she was going to change all that. No more nice little girl for her. She was going to find a way to change so she could stand up to others who deserved it.

Every evening and every weekend she searched for a way to change. She wanted to be more aggressive and more blunt. She just had to learn how. She went to the library and took out books on being more aggressive. She read articles on the Internet about how to stand up for yourself. She bought magazines and paperbacks with information on saying what you really thought. Then she learned of someone who advertised teaching you to not be afraid to tell others the true thoughts you have about them so she enrolled in their course.

Three times a week she took their classes. It put a dent in her checking account but she knew it would be worth it the day she could tell her boss to furnish her cubicle with a lower desk and a higher adjusting chair so she could type faster and not have to rest her arms so often or have indentation in her forearms even after she was at home. It would also be worth the money she spent when she told that woman next to her to close her mouth when she chews so more work could be done by those around her.  And while she was thinking about it, she wanted to tell her sister what a spoiled brat she was. She got by with three times what Lisa ever did growing up. 

Then there was her ex-boyfriend who dropped her for a tramp who was willing to sleep with him on the first date. That one she wanted to tell that she hoped he caught an STD from his new girlfriend.  As lessons went on, she thought of every person in her life she had intended telling off but never had. Now she thought of all the things she would tell them when her lessons were over. What a great feeling she would have when all of them were told what she had wanted to tell teem all  these years! 

Classes ended and Lisa felt like a whole new person. No longer would she bite back her words. No more of thinking about things she wanted to say to others. Now she could actually let loose and say them. Her first day at work she marched to her bosses’ office and gave him the ultimatum of furnishing her cubicle to fit her or she would turn him into corporate. He told her to clear out her cubicle and leave because she was fired.

As she passed the gum chewing woman she let told her all the things she had thought of for the months she had worked there. The gum chewing woman laughed in her face. On her way out she told every employee she had bit her tongue not to tell off exactly what she thought of them. Their answers told her what they now thought of her. When she got home she telephoned her sister to vent over the decade and a half of her sister being spoiled while she received all the punishments. Her sister told her to never call or visit her again. All the money she spent on the course to be able to tell people off had cost her the job, friends and family. Now she understood why she had remained silent most of her life. The cost to speak her mind was much to high. It was even more expensive than the lessons to be more expressive. Lisa went back to being the person she really was with a vow never to speak her mind like that again. She soon had a new job, new friends and her sister took her back when she promised never to call her spoiled ever again. Gee, it was great to be the real Lisa again.